Chapter 18

Hearing the men discuss their careers today, I realized with sudden clarity–I deserved that same confidence, that equal seat at the table.

Jared called again as soon as I got home. I answered while sinking into the couch.

“Why weren’t you answering your phone?” Jared’s suspicion bled through the line.

“Must’ve been on silent. What’s up?” The lie came automatically now.

“Who were you out with? Yvonne said you went out again.” He might as well have been taking attendance.

“Just some college friends,” I said lightly. “They’re all doing well here. Thought I’d reconnect before starting work.”

He seemed to turn my answer over in his head before responding. “You’ve changed lately. What’s going on?”

“Changed how?” I toyed with my hair, suddenly recalling my younger self–the one who wanted to burn bright, not fade into someone’s background.

“You’re dressing differently these days,” Jared said, proving he noticed every detail about me.

look good?” I asked with a playful

not… dignified enough.”

I barked a laugh. “Those wedding vows about loving me unconditionally–were

end was satisfying. “I never said it was bad,” he finally

I had zero patience for his

for a beat. “Fine. Goodbye,” he said

genteel husband who never raised his voice. But that same

what they were given. Coldness turned

college, I used to radiate joy, always smiling, always bright. That changed when I married

offered softly. “Would you care for

steadying breath. This was the

slept deeply that night until the nightmare came

the same helpless terror

with sweat.

pressing my palms against the sink until my reflection–young,

me I

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