Alpha Dom and His Human Surrogate by Caroline Above Story

Chapter 121 – Ella’s Past

Trigger Warning: This chapter contains experiences of abuse and S**ual a*sault – nothing explicit, but please take care reading!

Sinclair

Ella’s small body is completely stiff in my arms, even though we’re in her favorite place. I’ve only bathed with her once before, but it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out how much she loves a bubble bath. She takes at least four a week, and when she’s upset I’ve known her to have a bath even after showering. Until I spoke with Cora about Ella’s self-care practices, I didn’t understand the connection to her childhood experience of neglect, but now that I know I’m determined never to deprive her of the comfort – even if my water bills go through the roof and the city goes into a drought.

“Are you ready to talk this out, trouble?” I inquire, resting my hands on her round tummy and feeling a pulse of stress from the baby. A fresh spark of worry a*sails me, and I know that Rafe is channeling his mother’s fraught emotions. Ella doesn’t respond to my question, and I press on, realizing that the poor little wolf isn’t going to relax until she knows I’m not going to reject her. “Sweetheart, it never even crossed my mind to end things. I love you.”

Ella’s muscles tighten further, though I didn’t think such a thing was possible. “But…” She stammers, twisting around to look at me, “but you left!”

sorry that I walked out.” I reply gently, grazing my knuckles over her cheek. “But it wasn’t because I ever had doubts about us.” I share, wondering about my sweet mate’s reaction. I know some survivors of child abuse view any confrontation as a disaster or threat, but Ella has weathered my anger in the past without any signs of a trauma response. “I was angry that you thought you don’t contribute anything to our relationship, and my wolf lost it when you suggested you

you might end things.” She whispers, staring at the water. “I wasn’t even sure you’d come back… I think… I think maybe I have some abandonment issues I wasn’t completely aware of. And Mike’s betrayal and learning that I’m a wolf has thrown them into very

sorry, baby.” I profess, kissing her head and stroking her spine. “I shouldn’t have left you when you were already upset, I just don’t trust myself not to say things I don’t mean when I’m that angry. The same way I would never

her arms tighten around me. “Thank you,” She hiccups, “and I’m sorry I said I couldn’t be your Luna, but you have to admit that I’m not pulling my weight here. This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to be there

pulling her eyes up to mine. “First of all – you take care of me all the time. You saved my campaign. You keep me calm when I’m being an ogre. You stand up to bullies

“But I didn’t let you.

suggested tying her up. I’ve growled and grumbled at Ella a thousand times. I’ve put her over my knee and overpowered her countless

anywhere but at me. Slight pressure nudges my fingers as Ella gives a slight nod, and then her wide gaze returns to mine, suddenly so vulnerable that

“We’re in a S**ual relationship, Ella. I can’t avoid your triggers if I don’t know what they

and I hate knowing that I’m causing my mate to cry for the upteenth time today.

less, and the sooner

than me, but when she turned eleven and was going to be moved into a dorm with the older girls we both panicked a bit. We’d always been together and didn’t want to be separated, and she also used to crawl

deep breath. “She was always telling me how pretty I was… and that she’d had her eye on me for some time. I didn’t understand what she meant, but she always gave me a really uneasy feeling. In hindsight I think that might have been part of why I was so determined to stay with Cora…