SHARON

I wanted to believe that the doctor speaking was a man on a TV screen, an actor. Maybe he works part time as a doctor, maybe his real passion lies in acting; maybe he's practicing his lines for an audition. But they were just maybes, wishful thinking.

His face was set in a straight line and it was evident that he wasn't joking at all. He was telling me the real truth; one I didn't think I would ever be able to swallow.

"So you should take care of yourself and watch out for all of these. Hopefully, you'd conceive again and there'd be no miscarriage."

The tears that had been rolling down my cheeks had doubled. I was aware that I was sobbing loudly as he spoke.

This can't be happening, I thought for the umpteenth time. How can this happen?

"It's okay ma'am. It's-"

"Don't tell me it's okay," I whispered, my voice trembling.

It wasn't okay!

"This can't be happening," I whispered as I dropped my face in my cupped palms.

That pregnancy was everything. It was the key, the solution, the thing that would finally make my marital life better. It was the only thing that would have kept Aiden by my side. Now, it's gone and Aiden might be gone too.

No. I will not lose him. Never.

I sniffed and finally wiped my face.

"I didn't have a miscarriage."

The doctor's brows pulled together. "What?"

"No one must know about this. In fact, it never happened. Please, keep this between us."

The doctor hesitated. "Ma'am, I cannot-"

roughly pushed the chair back

He stood up and rushed to my side. "Please,

don't mention

must have seen the desperation in my eyes because he sighed and nodde stiffly. "It's

I

he really wouldn't tell, I fully expressed my gratitude to him. Then I left his

entered the hospital, I

still was no hint of a stain. I washed my face and

way, I stopped by a store and got a bleach. I washed off every stain of blood from

I briefly entertained the words of the part of

tilted to the bigger part that warned me to

hold on the steering

cannot find out yet. Not

that he'd go running back to

have to keep

Until when?

I conceive again. If I could get pregnant then it could happen

this to

I voiced to

that tiny voice that

that I was doing

right; if it was what would save my marriage from finally

car in the driveway, my heart painfully slammed

now? I wondered. Did the doctor call him? Did he tell

time I was done parking my car, he was out the door, worry lines on

halfway and pulled

looked at me, his gaze searching mine as if he

lot for me

throat just had

The meeting was dume

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