Bye-Bye Jerk, Hello Mr. Right by Rosie Steppe

Chapter 171

I froze.

I hadn't thought about that.

Probably not. I mean, I haven't kissed many people. Even with Jace, who I crushed on for ages, I only ever stole kisses when he was sick, half-asleep, or passed out drunk. And even then, it was just on his cheek or the back of his hand. But earlier with Hayden... our lips actually touched. That wasn't something Jace and I did much.

Jace used to kiss me on the cheek or forehead all the time, but a real kiss? Lips meeting, like really kissing? There was only one time.

I remember him saying, "Rea, we're too close. I just can't do it."

The truth-was, he just didn't love me enough. Someone once told me that when two people kiss, and it's real-like lips and tongues tangling-it's all dopamine. It's supposed to be uncontrollable.

If you can control it, well, that means you're just not that into them.

"I don't like hypotheticals," I finally said to Hayden.

His jaw tightened, and I watched his Adam's apple move as he swallowed. "But I want to know."

The intensity in his eyes was so strong, I could barely breathe under the weight of it.

I let out a sarcastic laugh. "Why's it such a big deal? First time a girl's kissed you?"

"Yes."

one word hit me like a slap, and my smile totally

awful, like a complete jerk: "Well,

one in control, but suddenly it felt

of "make

lips together, made a decision. If I wanted to shut this down, stop whatever hopes

Even the kissing. If you're gonna start

every

you can't handle it, then what choice do I have?" Hayden didn't say a word. I could feel this chill rolling off him, like he was trying to

get it you're all... pure. And yeah, asking you to

+25 BONUS

shove and

rolled down the window, giving

Nothing.

to say more, but bit it back. Instead, I rolled up

in the rearview mirror. Hayden was still there, standing alone in the dark. He looked... abandoned,

guilt hit me

place across from mine, but I couldn't

calling Lena again-still no