Chasing His Kickass Luna Back by Jane Above Story

#Chapter 45: Bad Taste
Abby

“Adam… Are you cheating on me?”

The anticipation of what Adam is about to say feels like a giant pit in my stomach. He stares down at

his hands, his fingers worrying each other in the dim light of the bar.

“Abby,” his voice starts with a tremor, “I’m not cheating on you. I would never do something like that.

Not to anyone, and especially not to you.”

The sound of the soft jazz music I’ve got playing on the speakers almost seems to die down, replaced

by a poignant silence. I’m a little relieved, but not completely. In an odd way, I think that I almost wish

he was cheating on me. It would make things easier. But now, I think that it must only be an even more

complicated explanation, and whatever it is, I’m not sure if I’m ready for it.

“What is it, then?” I ask. Every fiber of my being is attuned to him, waiting.

Adam hesitates for a moment, raking a hand through his hair, a gesture I’ve come to associate with his

nervousness.

“I’m not into women.”

His words crash over me like a tidal wave. I struggle to keep my composure, trying to grasp what he’s

just admitted. My mind goes blank, and then rushes in with a barrage of thoughts.

Confusion, hurt, and disbelief lead the charge.

“You’re… g ay, Adam? And you knew all this time?”

Adam nods slowly. I feel like I’m drowning. “You knew all this time, and yet you still put a ring on my

finger,” I murmur, shaking my head in disbelief. This has got to be some kind of sick dream. “Why did

you get together with me so quickly, then?”

After a moment of tense pause, Adam speaks. “I got together with you so quickly because…” He sighs,

his voice barely above a whisper. “…It made my family happy. It was a way to keep my secret buried

deep.”

in my throat. Tears well up, threatening to spill. “But why me, Adam?” I

me, of

shaky breath, his gaze filled with remorse. “It wasn’t planned, Abby.

was suffocating. Being

moments… they all felt genuine. But as things progressed, it

A lie I trapped

sick. “That’s not fair,” I mutter, blinking away the tears that threaten to come. “You toyed with

know it’s not fair,” he murmurs. “And I know it’s s hitty of

guess throughout our relationship, I just kept telling myself that I

I wasn’t sexually attracted to you, you made

other stuff

me happy.”

bar around us fades, and it’s just the two of us in our bubble of truth

to rage at him, I find

an understanding of the chains society can wrap around someone, chaining

expectations and norms.

tumbling out. “I’m so, so sorry, Abby.

not in the way you should be cared for. Not

romantic way you deserve.”

heel of my hand into my eyes, trying to stem

voice. “Why let it go on for so long without so

mirroring my own emotions. “Fear,” he chokes out. “I was

one person who

all this time, every touch, every

head, quickly, “No, not a lie. Distorted, yes. But I’ve cherished our moments,

you the kind

feel a pang of sympathy. Here

place. But at my expense?

The distant sounds

it all sounds so far away. I feel

slide to the engagement ring on my

wasn’t truly mine. With tears blurring my vision, I carefully

of the gesture

displaying the once treasured ring to Adam. He looks down,

same pain I feel.

and I

I whisper, pushing the ring towards him, my tears now streaming

belong to me anymore.”