Chasing His Kickass Luna Back by Jane Above Story

#Chapter 45: Bad Taste
Abby

“Adam… Are you cheating on me?”

The anticipation of what Adam is about to say feels like a giant pit in my stomach. He stares down at

his hands, his fingers worrying each other in the dim light of the bar.

“Abby,” his voice starts with a tremor, “I’m not cheating on you. I would never do something like that.

Not to anyone, and especially not to you.”

The sound of the soft jazz music I’ve got playing on the speakers almost seems to die down, replaced

by a poignant silence. I’m a little relieved, but not completely. In an odd way, I think that I almost wish

he was cheating on me. It would make things easier. But now, I think that it must only be an even more

complicated explanation, and whatever it is, I’m not sure if I’m ready for it.

“What is it, then?” I ask. Every fiber of my being is attuned to him, waiting.

Adam hesitates for a moment, raking a hand through his hair, a gesture I’ve come to associate with his

nervousness.

“I’m not into women.”

His words crash over me like a tidal wave. I struggle to keep my composure, trying to grasp what he’s

just admitted. My mind goes blank, and then rushes in with a barrage of thoughts.

Confusion, hurt, and disbelief lead the charge.

“You’re… g ay, Adam? And you knew all this time?”

Adam nods slowly. I feel like I’m drowning. “You knew all this time, and yet you still put a ring on my

finger,” I murmur, shaking my head in disbelief. This has got to be some kind of sick dream. “Why did

you get together with me so quickly, then?”

After a moment of tense pause, Adam speaks. “I got together with you so quickly because…” He sighs,

his voice barely above a whisper. “…It made my family happy. It was a way to keep my secret buried

deep.”

in my throat. Tears well up, threatening to

to me, of all the people in the

with remorse. “It wasn’t planned, Abby. When

from my family was suffocating. Being with you, it gave me an escape.

genuine. But as things progressed, it

lie

“That’s not fair,” I mutter, blinking away the tears that threaten to

deeply. “I know it’s not fair,” he murmurs. “And I

I just kept telling

sexually attracted to you, you made me

that I could get over the other stuff and just spend my

me happy.”

us fades, and it’s just the two of us in our

I want to rage at him, I find myself filled

but an understanding of the chains society can wrap around someone, chaining them

expectations and norms.

still speaking, words tumbling out. “I’m so, so sorry, Abby. I’ve been untruthful, and

deeply. But not in the way you should be cared for. Not

romantic way you deserve.”

hand into my eyes, trying to stem the tears. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“Why let it go on for so long without so

mirroring my own emotions. “Fear,”

losing the one person who made me feel

gravity of it all weighs on me. “So, all this time,

“No, not a lie.

the kind of love

Here is a man, torn

But at my expense?

distant sounds of people passing

sounds so far away. I feel

slide to the engagement ring

a love that wasn’t truly mine. With tears blurring my vision, I carefully slide the

finality of the gesture

open my palm, displaying the once treasured ring to Adam.

same pain I feel.

voice c racks, and I can tell he’s struggling with his

I whisper, pushing the ring towards him, my tears now streaming down my

belong to me anymore.”