Chasing His Kickass Luna Back by Jane Above Story

#Chapter 45: Bad Taste
Abby

“Adam… Are you cheating on me?”

The anticipation of what Adam is about to say feels like a giant pit in my stomach. He stares down at

his hands, his fingers worrying each other in the dim light of the bar.

“Abby,” his voice starts with a tremor, “I’m not cheating on you. I would never do something like that.

Not to anyone, and especially not to you.”

The sound of the soft jazz music I’ve got playing on the speakers almost seems to die down, replaced

by a poignant silence. I’m a little relieved, but not completely. In an odd way, I think that I almost wish

he was cheating on me. It would make things easier. But now, I think that it must only be an even more

complicated explanation, and whatever it is, I’m not sure if I’m ready for it.

“What is it, then?” I ask. Every fiber of my being is attuned to him, waiting.

Adam hesitates for a moment, raking a hand through his hair, a gesture I’ve come to associate with his

nervousness.

“I’m not into women.”

His words crash over me like a tidal wave. I struggle to keep my composure, trying to grasp what he’s

just admitted. My mind goes blank, and then rushes in with a barrage of thoughts.

Confusion, hurt, and disbelief lead the charge.

“You’re… g ay, Adam? And you knew all this time?”

Adam nods slowly. I feel like I’m drowning. “You knew all this time, and yet you still put a ring on my

finger,” I murmur, shaking my head in disbelief. This has got to be some kind of sick dream. “Why did

you get together with me so quickly, then?”

After a moment of tense pause, Adam speaks. “I got together with you so quickly because…” He sighs,

his voice barely above a whisper. “…It made my family happy. It was a way to keep my secret buried

deep.”

up, threatening to spill. “But why me, Adam?” I croak out.

do this to me, of all the people

gaze filled with remorse. “It wasn’t planned, Abby. When we met, I

Being with you, it gave me an escape.

genuine. But as things progressed, it became about

A lie I trapped

not fair,” I mutter, blinking away the tears that threaten to come.

know it’s not fair,” he murmurs. “And I know it’s s hitty of me. I

I just kept telling myself that I could

you made

could get over the other stuff and just spend my

me happy.”

just the two of us in our bubble

I want to rage at him,

society

expectations and norms.

so, so sorry,

But not in the way you should be

romantic way you deserve.”

heel of my hand into my eyes, trying

in my voice. “Why let it go on for so long

glistening, mirroring my own emotions. “Fear,” he

losing the one person who made

“So, all this

shakes his head, quickly, “No, not a lie. Distorted, yes. But I’ve cherished our moments, Abby.

offer you the kind of love

help but feel a pang of sympathy. Here is a man, torn and

place. But at my

between us. The distant sounds of

it all sounds so far away. I feel like I’m trapped

thinking, my fingers slide to the engagement ring on

a love that wasn’t truly mine. With tears

the gesture not lost

open my palm, displaying the once treasured ring

same pain I feel.

voice c racks, and I can tell he’s

towards him, my tears now streaming down my

belong to me anymore.”