Chasing His Kickass Luna Back by Jane Above Story

#Chapter 45: Bad Taste
Abby

“Adam… Are you cheating on me?”

The anticipation of what Adam is about to say feels like a giant pit in my stomach. He stares down at

his hands, his fingers worrying each other in the dim light of the bar.

“Abby,” his voice starts with a tremor, “I’m not cheating on you. I would never do something like that.

Not to anyone, and especially not to you.”

The sound of the soft jazz music I’ve got playing on the speakers almost seems to die down, replaced

by a poignant silence. I’m a little relieved, but not completely. In an odd way, I think that I almost wish

he was cheating on me. It would make things easier. But now, I think that it must only be an even more

complicated explanation, and whatever it is, I’m not sure if I’m ready for it.

“What is it, then?” I ask. Every fiber of my being is attuned to him, waiting.

Adam hesitates for a moment, raking a hand through his hair, a gesture I’ve come to associate with his

nervousness.

“I’m not into women.”

His words crash over me like a tidal wave. I struggle to keep my composure, trying to grasp what he’s

just admitted. My mind goes blank, and then rushes in with a barrage of thoughts.

Confusion, hurt, and disbelief lead the charge.

“You’re… g ay, Adam? And you knew all this time?”

Adam nods slowly. I feel like I’m drowning. “You knew all this time, and yet you still put a ring on my

finger,” I murmur, shaking my head in disbelief. This has got to be some kind of sick dream. “Why did

you get together with me so quickly, then?”

After a moment of tense pause, Adam speaks. “I got together with you so quickly because…” He sighs,

his voice barely above a whisper. “…It made my family happy. It was a way to keep my secret buried

deep.”

Tears well up, threatening to spill. “But why me, Adam?” I croak

to me, of all the people in the

his gaze filled with remorse. “It wasn’t planned, Abby. When we

from my family was suffocating. Being with you, it gave me an escape.

felt genuine. But

lie

I mutter, blinking away the tears that threaten to

he murmurs. “And

just kept telling myself that I could be happy

you made me

other stuff and just spend my life

me happy.”

the two of us in our bubble of truth

want to rage at him, I find myself

understanding of the chains society can wrap

expectations and norms.

words tumbling out. “I’m so, so sorry, Abby. I’ve

about you, deeply. But not in the way you should be cared

romantic way you deserve.”

eyes, trying to

in my voice. “Why let it go on for so long

own emotions. “Fear,” he chokes out. “I was afraid of

person

all this time,

“No, not a lie. Distorted, yes.

couldn’t offer you the

help but feel a pang of sympathy. Here is a man, torn and twisted by societal

find his place. But at my

us. The distant sounds of people passing by on the street

but it all sounds so far away. I

slide to the engagement ring

truly mine. With tears blurring my vision,

finality of the gesture not lost on

open my palm, displaying the once treasured ring to Adam.

same pain I feel.

and I can tell he’s struggling

ring towards him, my tears now streaming down my face. “It

belong to me anymore.”