Abby
My apartment is dark when I finally get home tonight. It still smells faintly of
fresh paint from the new coat that my landlord put on, but I can still sense the
lingering scent of smoke, too.
I decide to avoid the harsh glow of the kitchen lights as I plop the wine glass
that’s been tucked under my arm onto the counter island, followed by the bag of
takeout food that I picked up on my way home.
It’s still warm, the grease beginning to seep through the bag as the faint smell of
garlic and onions permeates through the air. On any other night, I might be
delighted to dig in; but honestly, I have no appetite tonight. Even the thought of
Enter title…
food makes me sick after everything, after all of the failed dishes. But I know I
need to eat, and if I don’t, I know I’ll regret it later.
For a moment, I dig through my cupboard for a plate and some silverware, but
eventually decide to opt out of the plate.
The cork gives a subtle pop as I open the wine. No glass, I decide. Not tonight. I
take a swig straight from the bottle, the sharp taste of alcohol momentarily
cutting through the numbness. It’s a start.
I crash onto the couch, the plush cushions a welcome comfort after being on my
feet all day. The TV flickers to life with a soft buzz a moment later, and I navigate
N*****x to drown myself in a world away from
passes. Hours, maybe. I feel like
wine, and even cheaper food.
truffle dish, the disdainful look in Logan’s
playing in front of me, crowding out
movies on the screen.
I whisper to myself as
pathetic now, especially when I was so sure that
either; it’s that I was humiliated on live
tussles were had, insults were
were ignored.
laughingstock. Hell, I
of my own
go there tonight. I can’t even bear
know I’ll be barraged with a chorus of sympathies
now, I just want to hide my head in the
wine finally empties. I don’t remember
in my head is enough proof. Groaning, I push my way
kitchen, where another bottle waits for
and make my way back
standing in the doorway with the second wine
TV, that I hear it: my wolf’s voice,
back of my
just going to wallow in misery, or are you going to
forward?”
the face, or a rush of cold wind on a
by surprise
my grasp, wine splashing
out loud and nearly fall onto the tile
kitchen
warned me,” I say out loud as I grab the towel
knees and dabbing
I’ve spilt wine
Abby?”
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