Abby
My apartment is dark when I finally get home tonight. It still smells faintly of
fresh paint from the new coat that my landlord put on, but I can still sense the
lingering scent of smoke, too.
I decide to avoid the harsh glow of the kitchen lights as I plop the wine glass
that’s been tucked under my arm onto the counter island, followed by the bag of
takeout food that I picked up on my way home.
It’s still warm, the grease beginning to seep through the bag as the faint smell of
garlic and onions permeates through the air. On any other night, I might be
delighted to dig in; but honestly, I have no appetite tonight. Even the thought of
Enter title…
food makes me sick after everything, after all of the failed dishes. But I know I
need to eat, and if I don’t, I know I’ll regret it later.
For a moment, I dig through my cupboard for a plate and some silverware, but
eventually decide to opt out of the plate.
The cork gives a subtle pop as I open the wine. No glass, I decide. Not tonight. I
take a swig straight from the bottle, the sharp taste of alcohol momentarily
cutting through the numbness. It’s a start.
I crash onto the couch, the plush cushions a welcome comfort after being on my
feet all day. The TV flickers to life with a soft buzz a moment later, and I navigate
N*****x to drown myself in a world away
not sure how much time passes. Hours, maybe. I feel like
wine, and even cheaper food. But
the disdainful look in Logan’s
playing in front of me,
movies on the screen.
to myself
was so sure that I would win. And
I lost, either; it’s that I was humiliated
were swapped, tussles were had,
were ignored.
be a culinary laughingstock. Hell,
out of my
there tonight. I
barraged with a chorus of sympathies
Right now, I just want to hide my head in
some point, the bottle of wine finally empties. I don’t
enough proof. Groaning, I push my way
couch and shuffle into the kitchen, where another
pop that open, too, and make
the doorway with the second
scene on the TV, that I hear it: my wolf’s voice, clear as day,
back of my
just going to wallow in misery, or are you going
forward?”
is like a slap to the face, or a
me completely by surprise in my current
grasp, wine splashing onto the
out loud and nearly fall onto the
the kitchen
warned me,” I say out loud as I grab the
knees and dabbing it into the carpet before
“Now I’ve
really your main concern, Abby?”
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