Abby
My apartment is dark when I finally get home tonight. It still smells faintly of
fresh paint from the new coat that my landlord put on, but I can still sense the
lingering scent of smoke, too.
I decide to avoid the harsh glow of the kitchen lights as I plop the wine glass
that’s been tucked under my arm onto the counter island, followed by the bag of
takeout food that I picked up on my way home.
It’s still warm, the grease beginning to seep through the bag as the faint smell of
garlic and onions permeates through the air. On any other night, I might be
delighted to dig in; but honestly, I have no appetite tonight. Even the thought of
Enter title…
food makes me sick after everything, after all of the failed dishes. But I know I
need to eat, and if I don’t, I know I’ll regret it later.
For a moment, I dig through my cupboard for a plate and some silverware, but
eventually decide to opt out of the plate.
The cork gives a subtle pop as I open the wine. No glass, I decide. Not tonight. I
take a swig straight from the bottle, the sharp taste of alcohol momentarily
cutting through the numbness. It’s a start.
I crash onto the couch, the plush cushions a welcome comfort after being on my
feet all day. The TV flickers to life with a soft buzz a moment later, and I navigate
drown myself in
how much time passes. Hours, maybe. I
of cheap movies, cheap wine, and even cheaper
dish, the disdainful look in
kiss with Karl—keep playing in
movies on the screen.
I whisper to myself as I
especially when I was so sure that
that I lost, either; it’s that I was humiliated on
had, insults
were ignored.
laughingstock. Hell, I might even
out of my
couldn’t bear to go there tonight. I can’t even bear to glance
I’ll be barraged with a chorus
now, I just want to hide my head
wine
proof. Groaning, I push my way
and shuffle into the kitchen, where another bottle
too, and make my way
as I’m standing in the doorway with the second wine
I hear it: my wolf’s voice, clear
of
misery, or are
forward?”
like a slap to the face, or a rush of
me completely by surprise
my grasp, wine splashing onto the carpet—a
out loud and nearly fall onto the tile
kitchen for
have warned me,” I say out loud as I grab
knees and dabbing it
I’ve spilt
main concern, Abby?”
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