Contract Marriage with My CEO Boss

Chapter 65

Chapter 65 KYLAN'S POV

In.

Out

I didn't matter how many fucking times Kylan tried; he couldn't calm his breathing. He couldn't quiet his racing mind. His fingers were flexing into repeated fats at his sides, his nails pressing hard to his inner palms each time his fists closed Stupid. He was so f*cking stupid

This was far from the first instance that Kylan had reacted poncle

d

poorly to a situation, but it might take the place of number one

Perhaps the worst part of it all was that he felt wholly out of control like he couldn't speak. Like he couldn't fix it. Like he didn't know how, Or rather, he didn't deserve to try.

And Pck, if Katrina didn't deserve to be treated better. To be cherished. To be loved. To be worshipped like the damn goddess Kylan knew her to

be

De

There had always been something special about her. Some innate part of her character that didn't entirely put Kylan off from talking to her, from having her work for him over the years she had been with Ross Corp. Her patience, her poise, her work ethic, all of it made it easy for Kylan to keep her on as his personal assistant.

She was a breath of fresh air, even if he never said as much to her. Even if he hadn't realized just how important or vital she was to him until only recently.

didn't want to soak all in. If he didn't want to out how to talk to her. To be with woo her.

But there was a barrier. A nearly visible stone fortress around his mind, his heart, prevented him from opening up to her. From talking to her. Really talking to her. Each time Katrina chipped at that armor, the armor he had relied on nearly his entire life, it only gained in strength and Layers

The monsters atop the fortress would then lean over the walls and all but toss Katrina of them as she was climbing, clawing, and trying to reach the

Any time she got too close. Kylan grew more afraid.

Any time he indulged himself in her just a little bit, he became more frantie, the monsters loading their cannons and preparing for a damn siege. just to keep him trapped

the grand scheme of things, he knew this wasn't healthy. He knew it wasn't right or fair, to either of them. But he

a false exterior of a give a fuck attitude and fancy cars and suits. Underneath it all, he was drowning in grief, in pain, in self-loathing that no one was ever

frantic body, had soothed his aching soul, and each time she did... Kylan hated

hated that she never gave up, even throughout the worst of his self-sabotaging behaviors. He hated it. But he was also grateful for it. He wished he could tell her

All of it was

of it was too

didn't deserve anything

oh, did he loathe

Easter to hide. Easier to pretend. He

the fortress, to fire her own weapons against it, to ricochet her way through the outermost layers in

to make

65

swore to himself he would never go through that again. That he could never lose anyone again. That it was too much, that it wasn't worth it. That he didn't need to let anyone get too close and beyond the spikes, or the moat of angry alligators with their gnashing jaws Chapter The contract was meant to be so simple. So bulletproof. It was easy enough, writing the rules with every intention of following them. Why would he not! He always

and Katrina had both urged him forward. Coasing him into doing what they thought was best for the company. Because hell, it was. With the rising stocks, and the actual positivity Kylan was being sent for the first time ever as CEO, it was easy to believe the contract was the right thing to do. To put in place. He only needed to take Katrina on dates, pose for a few pictures, hold her hand, appear on the day of their fake wedding, sign that damn fake mamage contract, and pay her for her forts. No big deal. Nothing that would cause Kylan to step too far out of his comfort zone. And yet, that's exactly what happened time and time again with Katrina. Somehow, she had made her way into his heart, into his mind. Somehow she kept seeing the parts of himself

was the last person she should give her love, her grace, her

every sludge filled, cracked, broken piece of himself. She was the light in the darkness, the breeze on a hot summer's day. the smell of

everything he could never give her.

himself, the battle between heart, mind, and what little of Kylan's soul remained, was the very reason he had to

himself.

understand. He would react before he could blink. He would speak before

overwhelmed with memones, with the shadows and ghosts that haunted the halls of his mind, of his heart that loomed over him to beg him to throw her

faces. The same three faces and the same three voices saying the same thing

worth it. That he never would be. That people would always leave him, in one way or

f*ck would

-0-0-0-

were nothing. Like they meant nothing. Because they didn't, not to

пе

He

with Ryan's guidance and counsel, he had learned how to hold his own with them. He had learned how to say the right things to do the right things, even if he never changed his voice or his personality to fit

it was mostly because the older of the two was patient with Kylan. He never understood why, and he hated. to consider the disgusting notion that it was because Ryan felt pity

after his mother's death. He hated the questions, the passing glances, the feigned sad eyes. It was the main reason he moved in with Kenny in the first place so that he that he could I get t away from

she seemed to know how to talk to him. How to calm him down, how to help him before he ever needed to guide her. She was patient with hins. She never talked

it, all of her broke him over and over aga All