Chapter One Hundred and Ninety Five

Lying here on the bed made me feel vulnerable before him, but I didn't trust myself to stand without getting dizzy. I stared up into those beautiful eyes-so beautiful that, for a moment, I wanted to forget everything that went wrong and just hold him close... No,

I shove the thought away.

"It didn't look that way to me. You told me that you've found a new life, one I wasn't part of-it seemed to me that you'd meant exactly what you said."

"I thought I could start over-I wanted to leave it all behind. But I couldn't. Not because of the pack but because of you. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't let you go."

"And those women?" I asked, unable to keep the jealousy from my tone.

"I thought using them would help me get over you. But it didn't."

"It hurts knowing you were with others. I know we weren't mated anymore, but I just thought..." My voice faltered. I exhaled sharply, shaking my head. "I can't do this right now. Just leave."

"Not this time. I'm not leaving this time, Kaida."

My eyes met his. "I blame you Alexander. I blame you for Aric's death. If you had arrived sooner, he wouldn't have died. He died saving my life-I should have been the one dead."

Of course, I knew how much he wanted Aric dead, and perhaps this was an added bonus for him, but Aric was a good person, and he didn't deserve to die

that way.

still been

Did you need one last taste of your new life' before letting it

guilt written all over his face. Good. He should feel guilty. I still remembered how indifferent he had been when I

I didn't expect was to be stuck in my wolf form. For days, I knew there was something I

back? How is that...

either. But with my father, I figured it was because he was a Lycan. This? No damn

for him; with his

you came back." I said realization finally dawning on me. "You'd never have come back without your wolf,

you were the only one on my mind. Leaving you and this pack was a

I finally

nothing to be sorry for; I,

live while he dies. I am not any better than him; why

tightened, like he was envisioning

1/2

Hundred and

cry. That sound... it broke me." His voice dipped lower. "I'll never forgive myself for leaving you, and

taken your advice and, like any 'big girl' would, moved on?" I threw his own

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