505 Friends Healing Friends
(Lisa)
I carry the tray carefully into the room, the smell of generic hospital soup wafting up.
Winona's sitting up in bed. She looks pale but more alert, her eyes flicking toward me as I set the tray down on the small table beside her bed.
"Dinner is served," I announce, gesturing to the soup like I'm unveiling a five-star meal. "Courtesy of the world-renowned Hospital Cafeteria. I am willing to risk my life and my palate eating this with you."
Winona lets out a faint laugh, the sound weak but genuine. "You're a true hero, Lisa. Braving the wilds of hospital dining for me."
"You'd better appreciate it," I say, as I sit beside her again. "I even got crackers. They didn't come with the soup, so I had to charm the grumpy lady at the counter. She now thinks I'm a struggling single mom of five kids, so you owe me." Winona raises an eyebrow, a small smirk tugging at her lips. "Five kids? Really?"
"Hey, I panicked, okay? She looked like the kind of person who gives you the stink eye for even asking. But the point is, I got the crackers. Now eat before I start spoon-feeding you like you're Henry."
She smiles but picks up the spoon, stirring the soup slowly. "You're ridiculous, you know that?"
"It's part of my charm," I reply, as I take a spoonful of soup.
"Mmmmm mmmm. Tasty as fuck." I lie. But it could be worse.
"You forget, I've had plenty of hospital soup. I know you're lying." Winona takes a tentative sip of the soup, and I watch her closely, noting the way her shoulders relax just a fraction. "See, it's not that bad, is it?"
"Not terrible at all," she admits. "But not Lobster Bisque either."
"Take me back to Europe, please! The food is to die for."
"I will miss the food."
"Wait... You aren't going back?"
plan...but now...I really want to
say I'd be sad to see
discussed it. I have to
is exactly why I can never be a mother. I'm just too selfish, you
"You are not selfish."
you. It's too tough a gig for
spoon pausing mid-air. "Yeah," she says softly. "Tough doesn't even begin to cover it at times. But it's also... everything. It's the hardest, most rewarding thing I've ever done.
it up
on the cracker thoughtfully. "I don't know how you do it. Kids are cute and all, but the idea of being responsible for tiny whole other humans?
that's okay. I don't think females
Winona pauses.
to feel incomplete or
get there. And
I... we talked about it. As you know, in those final days, he said if he ever had kids, he would want it to be
giving me her full attention. "He did love you. He just was never sticking around. He knew
trying to keep my
there was
maybe that's what
We'd
down one day,
build a
but I'm
never forced that issue.
would've been a mistake."
""You sure?"
her to do the same. "Parenthood's not for me," I say firmly. "And that's okay. I'm not... maternal like you are. And I'm not built for that kind
Winona's lips
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