Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

19. Nothing to give

I fix my hoodie so that I can look presentable instead of looking like I had a one on one with death.

“Why are you wearing a beanie, mommy” Noah looks at me suspiciously.

We were skyping after I had postponed it so many times. Mainly because I could barely keep my

eyes open for longer than five minutes. Today though, I was feeling much better

I leaned back against my headboard. The beanie was to hide the bandage. Noah still didn’t know

what happened to me and I would make sure he never does.

“It’s a bit cold and I’m feeling a bit chilly” I lie.

I feel guilty for lying to him, but I know it’s for the best. There was no need of worrying him.

“We have a heater mom, you could’ve just turned it on”

“It’s not working and I forgot to get someone to fix it”

Damn it, I hate lying to him. A part of me felt like I was being a terrible mother because it seems. I’ve done nothing but lie to him since father died. The other part though, understands that it’s

necessary. 3

“Okay then” he mumbles skeptically.

“So what did you do today?” I ask changing the subject.

Anything that he does excites me even though I’m not there to enjoy it with him. His happiness was my own and I would protect it at all cost.

The frown he had seconds ago transforms into a big smile.

“I saw dolphins today, I even swam with them…it was so fun!!” he shouts, his excitement contagious.

“I wish I was there to see you”

“Don’t worry mommy, grandma took a video. She said she’ll send it to you”

I nod my head at that. I had accepted the phone Rowan got me. Turns out he did more than buy me a new phone. He even replaced my sim card.

keep those calls short and impersonal. Like I said, I

Emma at dad’s house?” his unexpected

“What do you mean?”

+15 BONUS

was there sitting so close to him

frown that was so like

don’t hurt but deep down they still do. Knowing that Rowan was already playing house with her brings

fool ourselves into thinking we’ve moved on? Then the moment we’re hit

You’re going to have to ask your dad” I mumble, trying to hide how shaky my voice is and how affected I am

flaunt his relationship with Emma in front of our son, so he’ll be the one

a family again” he is sad and it breaks

to understand that your father and I

we loved each other. That we were okay. It was all a sham

had refused him when he said we should get married after I accidentally got pregnant. I was naïve back then. Thinking that I could make him love me. That it would only be a matter of time until he was in love with

a biological process. While my feelings were involved, his weren’t. We never made love because he didn’t love me. What we did was fucking and even then he was careful not to get

him?” Noah asks the same question he demanded

ago.

to him but I’ve done

isn’t enough. You won’t understand it now but one day,

I hope one day he gets the kind of love Rowan

on my open door

to see you, Ava”

+15 BONUS

of Miss or Madam. I am thankful that Letty

for me. I don’t know how I would have survived

that, mommy?”

it is in before I turn to my precious

to help me with chores” I answer

guess was correct then it is either Letty or Ethan. Both have stopped by a

needed it before, you’re super Mom” he looks

everything by myself. Even when I lived at Rowan’s mansion. I thought it would make him see me in a different light. That he would see that I am not as spoiled as Emma who couldn’t even boil water. That it would be a point

pid to think that he would stop hating me a little less if I made sure that all his meals were home cooked. That

“Mommy?” he calls out.

that when Travis walks in to my room. He was the last person I wanted to talk to, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t

just arrived and I need

“Okay then

goodbyes and he signs off. The

you, I never want to see you again”

emotions.

from foot to foot. “You’re my sister, I wanted to see how you’re

humorlessly. “Sister? Are you sure, Travis, because as far as I remember