Chapter 0213

Fuck. This was hard. I wanted to stop, but now more than ever, I knew they wouldn’t let me.

“Like I said, things were going well for some time. They weren’t perfect, but they were bearable. That is, had given birth to a baby boy and that Rowan fell until the night mom called me to let me know that Aus in love with his son at first sight. Everything around me crumbled, and all the pain I’d been hiding came to the surface.” I try to breathe through the pain of the memories, but it was so F***ing hard.

“I was in pain, and I was really angry. Angry at myself for turning down Rowan’s proposal, angry at Rowan for getting drunk and sleeping with Ava, angry at Ava for getting pregnant and marrying the man I loved and angry at the baby for being born.”

I hear a sharp intake of air. I don’t need to turn to know that it is from Rowan, I still struggle with being around Noah because if everything had gone the way I wanted it to, then he would have been mine and

Rowan’s child instead of his and Ava’s.

“I wanted to punish Rowan. To hurt him like he hurt me. I knew he always disliked Calvin for the way he crushed on me, so that night I approached Calvin and seduced him. I knew word would probably get back to Rowan, and that would have hurt him. That’s why I slept with Calvin that night, because I counted on Rowan’s friend telling him. He would have been so hurt, I would have gotten my revenge, and maybe then

would no longer hurt as

1

but it’s also how I lost my virginity. I was saving it for Rowan and in the end I gave it to the guy who kept fighting for

of me to sleep with a guy I didn’t even

the man I loved. I told Calvin that it was a mistake and that he should

us. I snuck out of his room, and I thought that was that. That

be

wrong. I hadn’t planned for what was to come

each other like the other didn’t exist, that is, until my period was late. A

appointment confirmed

I believed that one day Rowan and I would get back together. I didn’t want an unwanted baby to hinder that. I didn’t

get an emergency pill the morning after?” mom asks, making me blush a

was new to me. To put it plainly, I was naive.

I’d told Molly, she would have advised

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