Chapter 0483

Emma.

"Why do you think you refused to let go of Rowan? Why do you think you held on to him for years even knowing that he was married to Ava?"

Mia's question plays in my head as I try to think of a way to answer her. Why did I not let go of Rowan the

moment he slept with Ava? Why had I kept holding on despite the fact that he married her and stayed with her for years?

Sure, everyone told me how miserable he was. That he and Ava weren't getting on well. That he treated her like she didn't exist. Everyone told me that he still loved me and had refused to give Ava a chance.

Looking back now though, I'm not as blinded as I was. Despite what everyone told me, he still chose to remain married to her. He could have asked for a divorce anytime he wanted. Hell, the moment Ava was out of school, a bit stable in her job and Noah was a bit older, he could have filed for a divorce. He would have been able to be there for Noah and support him without being married to Ava, yet he never once thought of leaving their marriage.

was surprised when I was told Ava was the one that filed for divorce. We all thought that if they were ever going to separate, it would be at Rowan's demand,

voice

hope." I begin to explain. "I see it now. I wasn't able to let go because even though I was miles away in a different city, everyone kept pulling me to the past by reminding me how Rowan was unhappy and miserable with Ava. How he was still in love with me and refused to give Ava and

my seat and just stare into space as I continue. "It gave me hope. It made me hold on to that hope, thinking our love was great. Otherwise, why would Rowan still hold on to me when he had a wife and son? It also didn't help that, from when we were young, everyone, especially our mothers would tell us how

Is it really love when you've been manipulated to love and want someone? Is it love when you didn't

something down in her notebook. "And do you think you would have been happy with Rowan had you gotten a second chance? Would you

find the answers that you've been running from. Answers that you didn't want to hear so you

have

had was young, immature love. No, it wouldn't

it was. Rowan would always

length?" she pushes, refusing to give me the

back together. I didn't want him to find me in love with someone else when it was finally time for him

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