Chapter 34

“They’re really common,” I continue, “but not usually to this extent. But we learned, in my program, that when they’re really severe they can present with the intensity of a heart attack…”

He doesn’t look at me or say a word. I bite my lip, feeling suddenly sorry for him. I can’t help it. I’ve never really been able to see another person in pain and not want to help them.

“You know,” I say quietly. “There are doctors that can help you with this sort of thing. You shouldn’t suffer like this, if they happen all the time.”

“I don’t need to see a doctor.” He says, his voice determined.

o

I roll my eyes at him, a gesture I’m not sure I’d make if he were looking at me.

“Well, if you don’t want to see a doctor,” I say, hesitating again. “Maybe I could help?”

He lifts his head, his eyes open now. “How could you possibly help me.”

I purse my lips, frustrated. “I mean, I am a trained therapist. I wouldn’t think you’d forget that, considering it’s how we met.”

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He laughs a little. “Yes, Fay’s little certificate,” he says, his voice

derisive.

a seriously debilitating mental

he interrupts me.

to my doctor, Fay,”

wrong with me.”

my desire to help, push back against my instinct to follow

at me. “An anxiety

terms so they can have an excuse

they’re so inadequate.”

pushes himself to his feet. I do too, blocking the door with

health-”

angry with me, pressing his hand flat against the door so that I’m trapped between him and the exit. “Do you know what would happen to me in this

weakness in my

can guess, but I

be dead, Fay.” He says, glaring at me. “If

a lake with cinder blocks for

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all of my enemies would come – like the carrion birds they are- and pick pick pick-“he

to build.”

up at him, not knowing what to say.

“I think I’ll decline

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