Faux Vows, True Desires

After a long, painful silence, Nathan's voice came out hoarse with emotion. "Janice, I have to be honest with you. In my life, there's only ever been you. Past, present, and future... it's always been just you."

"Janice, I know I've been distant over the past twenty-some years, that I've let you down and you've suffered for it. That's on me. I failed to protect you and our kids."

Nathan explained his agony: "But I had to keep my distance to lessen the hurt coming your way. They mocked you, and that was better than them coming after your life. God knows, seeing you treated like that tore my heart out, like a knife twisting in my chest."

"I'm not making excuses for myself, Janice. I failed to protect my family, and that's on my weakness. I'm not asking for your forgiveness. But I can't go through with a divorce. I just hope that from time to time, I can come by and see you."

"Our Lucy is coming back to Skywatch with me in a couple of days. Will you come back with us? Can we be a family of four again, for real this time?"

As Nathan gently touched Janice's face, he spoke in a low, somber tone about his helplessness.

"If I'd known being the head of this household would bring you and the kids so much pain, I'd have never accepted it. But I can't escape where I come from. If I didn't take the position, they'd come after me just the same because anyone in power would see me as a threat. They wouldn't rest until they saw the end of our whole family."

So, he had no choice but to tough it out at the top. At least, this way, his family was alive, though they had to endure so much.

Pausing, Nathan admitted, "Janice, am I selfish? Am I weak?"

"The Porter was involved in all sorts of dirty dealings. I decided to play along, to gather evidence of his crimes. If something happens to me, go to our room, open the safe. You'll find the divorce papers I've prepared and signed."

"We'll divorce, you'll be free. Don't worry, before I go, I'll make sure Keith can take over the headship without any obstacles. The Blue family reforms are underway. The bad stuff, I'll take it all with me."

"After I'm gone, you can live with our son or daughter. I know they'll take good care of you."

"I'll gradually transfer my assets to you and the kids. Then the Blue family can't feed off the benefits we've provided while harming us at the same time."

Our kids can only be with you so much; they're young

you back, but he still hoped you'd find someone else. His preparations

and Janice were past the point

small price to pay for their safety and

having spent the first half of his life in hardship. He'd fought the

like he'd reached the end of his

he'd make it out

Janice. Even if she never forgave him, he'd follow her wherever she went, content just to see her

down, he rested his head against her, tears soaking

was, he leaned on her, slowly closing his eyes. He just wanted to feel what it was like to

was off, fighting off slumber like a belligerent

the eastern sky brightened, the black of night giving way

light, the shift occurring

her head

stomach, Instinctively reaching down, she touched a head and, startled, she jerked awake,

the ground with a thud,

sheets, peered down at Nathan sprawled on

covers aside,

Nathan with it all the while scolding him. "Nathan, you jerk! Trying to scare me to

huh?"

s

did you sneak into my room? What did you do

and though his