Four Brothers and a Bride

Chapter 55

Chapter 55: Chapter 55

ASHAL

"Are you angry right now, Mr. Rollins?" Dr. Welsh asks. She is a good-looking woman in her early forties with a sophisticated bent. She sits across from me, one leg crossed in front of the other with a pen and book in her hands. While laying on my back on the tuxedo sofa, I squeeze my stress ball harder and exhale deeply.

"I think so. A little bit."

"What are you angry about right now?"

"It’s not what, it’s who." I shut my eyes to pretend I am talking to myself in an empty room where no one can judge me, hoping that way I can express myself better.

"I am angry at the woman I love. We um...we attended a birthday party together. Before that, she promised me that she wouldn’t try socializing with certain people at the party. I left her by herself for a few minutes during the party to handle some things and when I got back to her, she was exactly where she said she’ll be."

"Keep going."

"The thing is, she broke her promise and did converse with the people she promised to stay away from...and she didn’t tell me about any of it. I had to find out from my brother and it made me look stupid."

I can’t believe Olivia spoke to Ashton and Demi. I can’t stop myself from wondering who else she must have talked to at that party. Why did she talk to them? Why did she intentionally omit that little detail when we discussed the party afterwards on our way to the penthouse? I am so pissed.

"Okay." I hear Dr. Welsh scribbling in her notebook. "Have you had a chance to talk to her about this?"

"I am too angry to. I don’t want to lose myself when I am around her and hurt her and I can’t talk to my brothers either because I lied to them to defend her. That’s why I’m back here."

"I understand, Mr. Rollins and I am very glad you resumed our sessions. Now, let’s circle back a bit. Can you tell me the exact emotions you felt when you discovered the woman you loved and trusted had lied to you?"

"Anger, obviously. Betrayal. Pain." A little pause. "This doesn’t count as an emotion but I did feel unloved." The last statement feels heavy in my mouth.

"Unloved?

"Yes. I tend to doubt her feelings for me whenever she lies to me."

"Is this peculiar to your relationship with her or extends to other people in your life?"

"I wouldn’t say it’s peculiar to my relationship with her." I shift uncomfortably. "It’s a thing with me. I tend to doubt people’s affection for me and it doesn’t help when they lie to me."

"How long have you been feeling this way? Was it before this relationship or after it?

I exhale deeply. "Long before. My brothers and I grew up under our father’s iron fists. He is very good at showing us tough love, as they say. There were four of us with this face and every day, the challenge of being on father’s good books grew steeper. I was also dealing with bullies at school during that period. It was just a lot of pressure for me. Despite being the son of a wealthy businessman, I felt like my father constantly pitted my brothers and I against one another to secure his affection. Then, something happened in school."

"What happened?"

"I beat up my bullies in school. I don’t recall how it went down but the boys were deathly scared of me afterwards. My brothers and I even had to change schools because of my action. That’s when my entire family really started to look at me differently. I mean, I always wanted to be a little different from my brothers growing up but that was not what I had had in mind when I thought of making my own mark one day. They all looked at me like I was a freak, especially father. I’ve always felt unloved and unworthy ever since."

"How has this affected your relationships with women?"

"I constantly feel like I have to work twice as hard as my brothers to get a woman to want me for the long haul, you know. This face and body mostly attract women who don’t want me for just me. It attracts women who want to be with me for my name, fame and money. I don’t mind that but then I worry my BPD wills scare them away. Unlike my brothers, I actually want to build a life with the one woman I cherish but my condition keeps driving a wedge between us. I always feel inadequate because of it. I feel unworthy because of it. To make matters worse, she’s in love with one of my brothers." I hate how pathetic my voice sounds at the end.

"Are you also angry at your brother?"

"No. He doesn’t want anything to do with her."

Dr. Welsh continues to pick my mind apart and uncover layers of hurt I didn’t even realize I had.

"Do you think your anger might be masking another emotion like fear or shame? Fear that you aren’t worthy of being loved just like your brothers? Shame over the things your anger has driven you to do in the past?"

ball harder and open my eyes. I hate it here. This is exactly why I can’t keep up with my appointments with Dr. Welsh.

my communication skills to help me express my anger in a healthy way which is appropriate with the intensity of a particular situation. I agree to take a walk to blow off steam and avoid

I need to stick with my sessions

on from her? What will happen if he randomly shows up in her life again and tells her everything she hopes to hear? Will she maintain her new resolve to have a life with

to check on her rather than going through Lily. For this, I got a second phone number

I pipe

chuckle. "It’s not going so well. I keep making a mess in the

You’re learning. Lily can

can’t assist me. She’s been

hope it isn’t contagious? Get Fitz to get her out

It’s not like that." Then in a low whisper. "It’s morning sickness.

out to pick up groceries delivered at the gate. Unless she’s had sexual relations with any of the bodyguards, there’s no other boyfriend outside the four walls of the penthouse who could be responsible for her pregnancy. If she hasn’t been cozying up to any of the guards, then it has to be that one night when I mistook her

my forehead. "How? Has she been seeing any of

it belongs to her lover. She’s only

"Her lover?"

in her eyes when she talks about him and

let her tear me and Olivia apart, not after everything we’ve been through to get here. I won’t let a nobody come between

will you be

spoiling her lately. All I can think of is how she still hasn’t spoken a word about talking to my family members at Demi’s party. I honestly hope she can bring it up before I do. "Okay. See you soon.

to speak to her first and clear up some

feeling too strong. Are you really

"Yes sir."

support yourself and your child

"R-Replace me?"

a friend to my wife and keep her company? If you can no longer perform your

The night we spent together..." Her voice wavers with tears. "I haven’t been with anyone

any other man in that building? You better think twice

gasps. "You are

in my house! Go figure it out with your child’s father. I don’t want you around Olivia. Please leave my house before

don’t fire me...I

really carrying, Lily?

she utters

guys from

lie

Drew denied me. I thought you wanted kids and would make a great father for mine if you believed you had fathered it.

to keep Olivia in the family and

***

slowly rises from her vanity mirror. She looks stunning in the bodycon dress I sent over. She’s is almost ready for our big date

swells with pride as her eyebrows knit with a tight frown. Still, I

he wasn’t looking and came in here pretending to be him. Don’t worry, I’ll have it back to him long before

she’s thinking. "Yes, I borrowed his car too obviously. I didn’t want the security team alerting him under any circumstances so I left no stone unturned in making sure

am with Ashal now. He loves and cherishes me

don’t say that, Liv.

pieces. Get out or I’ll

hear me out before you make me leave.

Asher or

coming to fruition. I had managed to convince my father that I will be a better match for a strong-willed woman like you. He promised to get Ashal to divorce you and get us married publicly. I came to share the good

him and have a family with him. He even said mother was a witness. I couldn’t believe it. I was too shocked

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