1. A Dreary Night

ZEDKIEL.

This day is one that I will always remember.

The threat she held over me she meant it.

It was sickening to watch her take on Evangeline’s coy demeanour, to see her fit in with all her ways, and only when I told Kash what happened did he believe me.

Night has now fallen, and she is asleep by my side. No matter how fucking angry I am, my woman is inside there somewhere.

I regret that the last words we exchanged were ones of anger. Hers hurt like a fucking knife in the chest, but to hold on to my sanity I tell myself that she was not herself when she spoke those words.

My Evangeline knows she means the fucking world to me. No one else matters, only her. I will do anything for her. Anything.

‘But if you weren’t so nice to that woman! Then our mate wouldn’t have been hurt!’ Zerachiel snarls menacingly.

His wrath burns me like poison and guilt rips through me.

I know I messed up, I never meant for this to happen. I was just fucking trying to do the right thing.

I sit there, leaning against the headboard as I look at her sleeping form.

I feel hollow… there’s a gaping hole inside of me that needs Evangeline back. Her somewhat of

a rejection has numbed me but at the same time, I can’t explain the crushing pain that now festers inside of me.

If I can turn back time I’d change that, but I can’t help but let the doubts eat at me. Being alone most of my life has made it hard to feel as if I am good enough… Am I?

What have I really done for her?

Nothing.

She didn’t want anything to do with me. How was she able to so easily cast me aside?

‘Stop it! Remember, we are doomed to fail; you must do the right thing…’ Zerachiel growls, cutting me off.

How do I fix this?

The anger inside of me is bubbling, rising with each passing moment, and I know it’s not Zerachiel’s but mine. It’s growing and the hatred for the woman that lay there in my woman’s body is only getting stronger.

My heart is thundering, my eyes blazing red as I glare out at the moon.

What does it mean to be the goddess?

What power does Evangeline have that she was so easily thrown into the abyss of her mind?

Where is the power of the Moon Goddess when we need it?

‘Zerachiel… tell me why does Evangeline have visions of me killing her… why do I even kill her? Because I can’t see myself ever being able to do that… even if it’s Evelyn in her body. I can’t hurt her.’ I ask him, trying to make sense of it.

I need something or someone to tell me that this isn’t the end, that I’ve not lost her yet. That there is hope.

that festering rage bleeding through me and slowly cracking the hold I have upon my anger. Anger won’t get me anywhere. I’m

killing her… perhaps because she is no longer there… but still, she is our mate, they are our mates… you cannot kill them for the sake of others.” His voice is full of anguish, tied with an excruciating pain that is tearing through my chest to the point I

can feel his struggle,

Evangeline was going to

His

as the sting of betrayal twists

enough to keep her… She never

I realise that she’s been trying so

curse… or curses.

need to fight

heavily, I close my eyes, trying to focus

pondering over what

has given us the answer.’ Zerachiel

How do I go there and what about her? What will happen to her with Evelyn in charge? I

she can go to the realm… Not just anyone, let’s see. There must

have him on my side. Someone to help keep my sanity intact. I hope he can genuinely see that

that, but you are

me from the start or fucking warned me, things could have been handled better. Don’t you feel that you made matters worse? Instead of guiding me and helping me, all my life you have just shut me out.’

shit blame game, but he’s meant to be

feel a heaviness settle inside, weighing me

‘Do

think that only you

I frown slightly.

A prisoner who sees your stupidity lifetime and lifetime

pushed me, when she released that anger, there was fear and

She didn’t.

because I’m about to lose my fucking

my side; her breasts rising and falling and a part of me wants to hate her entirely, but one thing that

wants to

I’ve seen what it can do to a person as pure as Evangeline.

always ruins everything!’

‘Have you ever shown her

the one who is saying this, especially when it comes to Evelyn, who has done nothing but ruin everything. She is the damn reason Evangeline isn’t here, but I also know the

of her!’ He spits and I fall silent, staring

can you

doesn’t reply, and it

he hates me, for being

not entirely, as Evangeline had the habit of

to get some sleep as much as I don’t want to be in her presence. I also know she’s the

her, trying to think of a way

I

seems to hesitate before

are ancient arts that they excel in.’

frown. Does that mean I should

quarters. Two were regarding vampires and I know she’s been looking for answers for Kash and with Evelyn here, I had given him the books to check through. But if there’s no answer, for

to

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