His Trouble Maker

Chapter 107

Jessica

Grayson has always loved me.

I think he forgot to mention how he also can’t keep his stare to himself.

The truth is, the reason why I’m always disobedient with him is not really because I hate him.

Sometimes, he sneaks behind my brother’s back just to spit an insult into my ear.

Most of the time, I catch him watching me from across the room like he’s imagining how I’d taste if he stopped pretending

he was good.

And I think I took that stare as proof–proof that he hated what I am.

So I humiliate myself more just so I can tease him more.

Being hated by him is fun when I was younger.

I liked the way his jaw clenched. The way he snapped when I smiled at someone else.

The way he always said no but never walked away.

He’d corner me and growl like an animal and say the most disgusting things and I’d drip for him like I was born to be ruined by his voice.

I never admitted it.

I used to think I was taunting him.

But maybe I just wanted to be ruined.

By him.

Only him.

-And now it’s different. Now everything’s splitting apart and I don’t recognize my voice when I scream. I can’t even trust the

words in my mouth because half of them aren’t mine. They taste like rot. Like him. Like Riot.

I think something’s in me, crawling up through my blood, trying to unmake me. I think Grayson knows. I think that’s why he looks at me like I’m already gone.

name. And when he ties me down and stares like he hates himself for what he has to do–it makes

die in his hands, at

bruised from the belts he wrapped around them to stop me from slashing someone open. Mouth cracked from screaming. Eyes wrong. My brother won’t

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Chapter 107

every time

“Jess…”

*Jess…open your eyes!”

He looks so worried.

feral alpha looks

all my strength,

breath catches. My body jerks like it doesn’t belong to me anymore. But I find him. I always do. Grayson. Hovering above me like he’s the one dying. Like this is

“Hey,” he whispers.

His voice breaks.

to be okay. That he better not shed tears for me. My lips tremble as I struggle to reach for his

like it’s the last

Before I knew that love could feel like this–like a

the reason I keep coming back, even when I don’t know who I am anymore. He’s the reason I fight the voice in my head that says let go. Because if I let go, I let go of

And I’m not ready.

I’ll never be ready.

you. I fucking love you and you don’t get to look at me like I’m slipping through your hands and you

were always enough. You’re the only one who

arms and pray he hears me

“Are we far yet?!”

almost funny to hear fear in my brother’s

again, rawer now, pleading. “Jess,

tell him it’s okay. I want to tell him I forgive him for not loving me the right way. For never seeing the parts of me that needed it most. For calling me selfish

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Fri, 29 Aug • @

Chapter 107

Can’t even turn my head. Can’t blink without feeling like I’m tearing the

don’t make it, he’ll accompany Grayson to their drinking session. I

But it’s not mine. Not really. It’s bigger. Wrong. Its heartbeat doesn’t sync with mine. It snarls

know it’s not mine.

1 feel invaded.

Infected.

by memory–until I can’t tell which thoughts are mine and which

to see a shadow moving above me–Grayson’s face, but smeared and flickering, like I’m seeing him through water. I think he’s speaking. I