I Am The Luna

Chapter 119

I Am The Luna by Moonlight Muse Chapter 119

An Exchange
SEBASTIAN.

All I see is the look in her eyes as she raised the gun and shot me.

I’ve lost her.

She will never forgive me, and why should she?

I brought this on myself…

The same thoughts circle my mind, slamming me with the brutal truth of what I have done.

Spinning, screaming, and shouting as they whirl around my head; and there’s nothing I can do but accept it.

I was close to death after she shot me, but Gerard refused to let me die, although both Gaultier and Zade didn’t mind if I did.

All I remember was Gerard saying he would not let me die and if anything happened, they would all suffer the consequences.

I now stare out at the moon through the skylight. Night has fallen, but it’s just another painful day gone. Another day that I am haunted by the memories of the Alpha Queen shooting me without any hesitation.

I deserved that.

There was a moment she was shocked… but it was just a secondary reaction. She didn’t turn back as she left the room, but I shouldn’t be expecting anything, anyway. When the one who pushed her to this was none other than me.

How many times have I betrayed her trust? Far too many times.

I know that… but then why do I sit here thinking of her day and night? With every day that passed I realised that, that I don’t think I could live without her. Which doesn’t matter anyway, this isn’t about me…

The guilt of every fucking stupid decision I’ve made, the regret of every fucking time I’ve caused her pain, claws at me. Ripping me apart with guilt and regret from the inside.

She deserves so much fucking better. Yet I know that she loved me, and I destroyed her faith in me repeatedly. I can feel my wolf’s agony inside of me, his anguish at the fact I do not have her nearby. 1

I don’t deserve her, not anymore… she was too good for me from the start… and although I thought I did good, all I did was fucking hurt her.

I’ll never forget the way her lavender eyes were full of pain.

My head drops as I feel the stinging in my eyes as my vision blurs.

Why did I always fuck up even when all I want is the best for those I love?

“What is going on?!” Gaultier’s distant snarl makes me look towards the doors. Something must have happened…

I stand up, silently making my way to the door and open it. They’re probably watching me in this room, anyway.

I try to be careful, but I also know they will never fully trust me, regardless. Gaultier slams his fist into the wall as Zade growls at him.

“Calm the fuck down. We can’t let…” he trails off when he sees me.

over to them, and

need to fucking know. Aren’t you meant to

the poison in the bullet, I am still not fully

fuck

go ask Gerard what the fuck is going on,” I shoot back coldly, about to turn

this doesn’t involve you,” Zade

now of all fucking times they figured out the cameras?” He

react, cocking a brow. “Cameras? What are

understood the

ahead instead of being spied

in your shitty pack!” Gaultier snarls

him.

him and I’m doing my fucking all to stop myself from bashing his fucking face

I hear it, the extremely silent footsteps of Lawrence. He was freaking silent, even more than me, able to mask his scent and heartbeat efficiently and I don’t think he even

this? It’s no small matter. If something has happened with the cameras, then we need

that they

has stopped,

going to tell him? That somehow, they found out?” Gaultier

you think they’ve discovered them?” Zade says

you

our people in that pack. Maybe we do need

I say, just as Lawrence

no maybe to it.” hist voice comes from to the left, making both

Zade says, lowering

what’s happened?” he asks

got this, Zaia…

Ms Agatha. All the cameras have been

Agatha?

sharply, my heart

Mom?

must be

mind is spinning as Lawrence

of the pack. See if you can mind link her.” He commands, and

my mother?” I ask. The words are like poison

Lawrence looks at me.

as they are family.” He says, almost as if wanting

What?

surprise to you, Sebastian?” Lawrence

head, although her betrayal feels like a punch in the gut. “No, I mean- yes, about Gaultier, but Mom belongs on our side. She’s always been my greatest cheerleader, to know that even now I am making her

good.”

it fucking doesn’t. How could she do this? Everything

as I try

My stomach churns and it’s taking my all not to react. I fucking pray she has been. caught. I can’t

for a good cause,” Lawrence says as he walks over to me and places his hands on my shoulder. “Now. How about the two of us

question. If Mom

He smiles.

you, but I don’t think she will kill your mother,” he

my woman.” I correct him and I fucking mean it because I don’t fucking deserve her. The memory of her touch, her body against mine, the feel of

don’t deserve

smile only widens as he pats my back, a move that

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