Letting My Brother's Best Friend Take My V-Card

OVERTHINKING

LAURA

It had been a whole week of awkward glances and total silence between Josh and me. Every time I passed him in the halls, he'd look at me-just for a second-and then immediately look away, like I was something too painful or shameful to face. The worst part? It didn't matter. Not really. Because no matter how much I wanted to believe otherwise, Josh would never see me the way I saw him.

dragged my books closer to my chest as I walked past him again. He was leaning against the lockers, laughing at something one of his friends said. The sound of his laughter made my chest tighten, even though I knew better. He didn't see me. Not really.

That night at the party-God, what was I thinking? Josh was drunk, and I was just... almost. Almost a convenient fuck. The kind of girl you don't remember in the morning because she didn't mean anything. And then that night at my house-he only stayed because he felt guilty. He hit me. It was an accident, but still... He stayed because he felt bad, not because he wanted to.

He didn't stay because he liked me. Or because he thought I was worth his time. It was guilt. Plain and simple. And I needed to stop torturing myself by hoping it was anything else.

"Laura!" Jess's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I turned to see her and Sam walking toward me, Jess with her signature unimpressed expression and Sam grinning ear to ear like she

0.00%

OVERTHINKING

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had just won the lottery.

this weekend," Sam announced, practically bouncing on her feet.

I asked,

other over some stupid ball. Plus, there's an afterparty. With more boys. Boys not from this godforsaken school." Jess

off, "but you don't hate parties. And there will be cute guys there. Guys who don't know

"You two go have fun. I'll

to me, her

Parties weren't really my thing. Especially not after the last one. And the idea of

swallowing nails. But the way Sam looked at me-so hopeful, so excited-I couldn't bring myself to

said, forcing a small smile.

clapped her hands together like she

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it. This is exactly what

Jess said, raising

said. "Both of you need to stop being so mopey and start having some fun. Laura, you've been sulking all week, and Jess, you-well, you're always

knew it was a lie. I'd been sulking, all right. Sulking, overthinking, replaying every awkward moment with Josh in my

scream.

Sam said, not unkindly. "And that's okay. But this weekend, we're changing that. New boys, new

enthusiasm, but the truth was, I wasn't sure anything could fix how I felt right now. How do you get over someone who was never yours in the first place? How do you stop wanting something you know you can