Lightning Is the Only Way

"There is no one that elicits these kinds of feelings from me," Mortis answered. "I see so many different Cultivators, but they all look the same to me. They are either strangers, friends, enemies, or whatever. There is no difference."

"So, do humans need some kind of connection with a stranger for love to exist in the future?" Azure asked. She was genuinely curious about all of this.

Mortis' brows furrowed. "No, not really."

"Then why does that have to exist for you to try?" Azure asked.

For the first time, Mortis didn't answer immediately.

Why didn't he just get to know more people?

Was it really necessary that his spark had to exist for a relationship to blossom?

Obviously not.

There were plenty of mortals and Cultivators that got together with people after just being friends for years on end.

There had been no romantic attraction between them in the beginning, but they had eventually ended together.

For some reason, a kind of pressure appeared in Mortis' insides.

'Is it because of my past?' he thought. 'I've felt how Gravis have felt for so long. I've felt these intense bursts of warmth and love inside myself so many times.'

Mortis looked into the distance. 'Is it because I fear disappointment? Do I fear that my eventual love won't be as vibrant as the love Gravis feels for Stella?'

A moment of silence passed.

'And then, this entire thing with Joyce happened, which confirmed my fear. I was attracted to Joyce, but I never felt anything remotely as intense as what Gravis felt for Stella back then.'

'And then, Joyce died, and I felt like my ability to love died with her.'

Mortis glanced over at Azure, who only looked into the distance with a thoughtful expression.

'I think I fear disappointment,' Mortis thought. 'It might be possible that I'm afraid of losing my hope. I can dream about how great love is and how it makes me feel, but I'm afraid that my imagination is off.'

Another moment of silence.

'If even love turns out to be a disappointment, what else is there left but greyness in my life?'

'If love doesn't live up to my expectations, what reason do I even have left to live?'

"Azure, why do you cultivate?" Mortis asked.

Azure was surprised by the question. How did Mortis even come up with that question?

"Why do I cultivate?" Azure asked.

Mortis nodded.

Azure remained silent.

"I don't know," she said after several seconds. "Honestly, I haven't really thought about it. Living just feels natural to me, and it's like something I just have to do."

"Is there something in your life that you don't want to lose, no matter what?" Mortis asked.

Azure remained silent for a bit longer as her expression became uncomfortable.

"Not really," Azure answered with an unsure voice.

you keep comprehending Laws? Why do you go through

fun. We all do it out of necessity since we want to

We don't want to feel the pain of a loved one dying. We want to spend more time with our loved

the point of surviving?" Mortis asked, looking at Azure. "From what you've said, you sound like you don't have anything you want to live for. So, why

Azure remained silent.

silent

time, Mortis

had only asked some things he was curious about, but he realized that

Mortis. He was thinking these thoughts every single

had never even asked herself

to answer, and you also don't need to question yourself regarding this topic," Mortis added. "You obviously have something to live for. Otherwise, you wouldn't have had the willpower to get through so much fighting

her expression showing an internal struggle. "What do I

made you to become powerful. You're not a human, and you don't need to have the feelings we humans have. For you, power might have a vastly stronger appeal than for

comparing them to humans. You're not a human, and you

Mortis had regretted asking his earlier question. Azure seemed to

the case," Azure said as she looked at Mortis with confusion and nervousness.

Mortis raised an eyebrow.

am simply overwhelmed by something I have never felt before," Azure said. "That's why

do you

that sucks out all the drive in my being, and it feels like it's

became uncomfortable, and he

a feeling he

"Hey, listen-"

I'm a Star God, and I've gone through worse. You don't need to fix me or anything. I

After all, he knew how overwhelming

but she didn't try to convince Mortis immediately. Instead, she wanted to tell him

simply becoming more powerful.

that I wouldn't have felt anything like this in the past. I haven't felt anything even remotely like

beasts get a Spirit when we become Star Gods, right?" Azure asked. "So, when we get a Spirit, does it also mean

thought when Azure said

Could she be right?

Mortis

Azure

Magnates?" Azure asked. "You said

about it?"

always tried

Law

Mortis' eyes widened.

Right!

beast even go about comprehending the

he was sure that a beast couldn't feel the amount of empathy

impossible for a

become a Heaven's Magnate if it's impossible for a beast to feel like

you can now feel love like humans?"

said. "I think so, but I can't

looked at

try?" she

Mortis froze.

That…

Azure. "Could you be a bit more specific?"

to see if we could love each other," Azure added. "If it doesn't work, we can just stop. After all, even if I can't feel it, I know a bit about how it works, and I know that

scratched the back of his

don't know," he

confused. "I see no downside, only upsides. We will come out with more knowledge, no

Then, Azure remembered something.

not attractive to you?" Azure asked,