Lightning Is the Only Way

"There is no one that elicits these kinds of feelings from me," Mortis answered. "I see so many different Cultivators, but they all look the same to me. They are either strangers, friends, enemies, or whatever. There is no difference."

"So, do humans need some kind of connection with a stranger for love to exist in the future?" Azure asked. She was genuinely curious about all of this.

Mortis' brows furrowed. "No, not really."

"Then why does that have to exist for you to try?" Azure asked.

For the first time, Mortis didn't answer immediately.

Why didn't he just get to know more people?

Was it really necessary that his spark had to exist for a relationship to blossom?

Obviously not.

There were plenty of mortals and Cultivators that got together with people after just being friends for years on end.

There had been no romantic attraction between them in the beginning, but they had eventually ended together.

For some reason, a kind of pressure appeared in Mortis' insides.

'Is it because of my past?' he thought. 'I've felt how Gravis have felt for so long. I've felt these intense bursts of warmth and love inside myself so many times.'

Mortis looked into the distance. 'Is it because I fear disappointment? Do I fear that my eventual love won't be as vibrant as the love Gravis feels for Stella?'

A moment of silence passed.

'And then, this entire thing with Joyce happened, which confirmed my fear. I was attracted to Joyce, but I never felt anything remotely as intense as what Gravis felt for Stella back then.'

'And then, Joyce died, and I felt like my ability to love died with her.'

Mortis glanced over at Azure, who only looked into the distance with a thoughtful expression.

'I think I fear disappointment,' Mortis thought. 'It might be possible that I'm afraid of losing my hope. I can dream about how great love is and how it makes me feel, but I'm afraid that my imagination is off.'

Another moment of silence.

'If even love turns out to be a disappointment, what else is there left but greyness in my life?'

'If love doesn't live up to my expectations, what reason do I even have left to live?'

"Azure, why do you cultivate?" Mortis asked.

Azure was surprised by the question. How did Mortis even come up with that question?

"Why do I cultivate?" Azure asked.

Mortis nodded.

Azure remained silent.

"I don't know," she said after several seconds. "Honestly, I haven't really thought about it. Living just feels natural to me, and it's like something I just have to do."

"Is there something in your life that you don't want to lose, no matter what?" Mortis asked.

Azure remained silent for a bit longer as her expression became uncomfortable.

"Not really," Azure answered with an unsure voice.

you keep fighting? Why do you keep comprehending Laws? Why do you go through the fear and pain of

of necessity since we

don't we want to die? Because we have something in our life that we don't want to lose. We don't want to feel the pain of a loved one dying. We want to spend more time with our loved ones. We

Mortis asked, looking at Azure. "From what you've said, you

Azure remained silent.

remained silent for several

time, Mortis

but he realized that his words might have had an unintended effect on

were normal to Mortis. He was thinking these thoughts every single

comparison, Azure had never

to question yourself regarding this topic," Mortis added. "You obviously

an internal struggle. "What do

a human, and you don't need to have the feelings we humans have. For you, power might have a vastly

try to invalidate your reasons for living by comparing them to humans. You're not a human, and

Mortis had regretted asking his earlier question.

she looked at Mortis with confusion and nervousness. "I know what you're trying to do right now, but your worry

Mortis raised an eyebrow.

before," Azure said.

you feel?"

emptiness," Azure said. "It's like a black hole that sucks out all the drive in my being, and it feels like it's consuming

expression became uncomfortable, and

feeling he was very

"Hey, listen-"

I've gone through worse. You don't need to fix me or anything. I can

all,

noticed Mortis' expression, but she didn't try to convince Mortis immediately. Instead, she wanted to tell him

never had an issue with life, and I felt satisfied with simply becoming more powerful. However, as soon as you brought my attention to the purpose

I wouldn't have felt anything like this in the past. I haven't felt anything even remotely like

become Star Gods, right?" Azure asked. "So, when we get a Spirit, does it also mean that our emotional concepts become more

also fell into thought when Azure

Could she be right?

now, Mortis

Azure added

become Heaven's Magnates?" Azure asked. "You

it?" Mortis

become a Heaven's Magnate, you need to know all the four main Laws, and one main Law always stumped me. I always tried to think of a way to comprehend it, but I never came

the Law of Empathy,"

Mortis' eyes widened.

Right!

a beast even go

took to comprehend the Law of Empathy since he knew it, and he was sure

be impossible

Magnate if it's

you can now feel love like humans?" Mortis asked in

so, but I can't

looked

to try?" she

Mortis froze.

That…

looked at Azure. "Could you be a bit more

works, and I know that it would hurt you if I couldn't reciprocate. So, we can just try, right? If it works, we can both experience love, and if it doesn't, we can just

the back of

don't know," he

confused. "I see no downside, only upsides.

Then, Azure remembered something.

it because I'm not attractive to you?" Azure