Lightning Is the Only Way

"There is no one that elicits these kinds of feelings from me," Mortis answered. "I see so many different Cultivators, but they all look the same to me. They are either strangers, friends, enemies, or whatever. There is no difference."

"So, do humans need some kind of connection with a stranger for love to exist in the future?" Azure asked. She was genuinely curious about all of this.

Mortis' brows furrowed. "No, not really."

"Then why does that have to exist for you to try?" Azure asked.

For the first time, Mortis didn't answer immediately.

Why didn't he just get to know more people?

Was it really necessary that his spark had to exist for a relationship to blossom?

Obviously not.

There were plenty of mortals and Cultivators that got together with people after just being friends for years on end.

There had been no romantic attraction between them in the beginning, but they had eventually ended together.

For some reason, a kind of pressure appeared in Mortis' insides.

'Is it because of my past?' he thought. 'I've felt how Gravis have felt for so long. I've felt these intense bursts of warmth and love inside myself so many times.'

Mortis looked into the distance. 'Is it because I fear disappointment? Do I fear that my eventual love won't be as vibrant as the love Gravis feels for Stella?'

A moment of silence passed.

'And then, this entire thing with Joyce happened, which confirmed my fear. I was attracted to Joyce, but I never felt anything remotely as intense as what Gravis felt for Stella back then.'

'And then, Joyce died, and I felt like my ability to love died with her.'

Mortis glanced over at Azure, who only looked into the distance with a thoughtful expression.

'I think I fear disappointment,' Mortis thought. 'It might be possible that I'm afraid of losing my hope. I can dream about how great love is and how it makes me feel, but I'm afraid that my imagination is off.'

Another moment of silence.

'If even love turns out to be a disappointment, what else is there left but greyness in my life?'

'If love doesn't live up to my expectations, what reason do I even have left to live?'

"Azure, why do you cultivate?" Mortis asked.

Azure was surprised by the question. How did Mortis even come up with that question?

"Why do I cultivate?" Azure asked.

Mortis nodded.

Azure remained silent.

"I don't know," she said after several seconds. "Honestly, I haven't really thought about it. Living just feels natural to me, and it's like something I just have to do."

"Is there something in your life that you don't want to lose, no matter what?" Mortis asked.

Azure remained silent for a bit longer as her expression became uncomfortable.

"Not really," Azure answered with an unsure voice.

comprehending Laws? Why do you go through the fear and pain of tempering yourself?" Mortis

Cultivator would rather do anything else. No Cultivator goes out and tempers themselves just for fun. We all do it out of necessity since we want to become

we have something in our life that we don't want to lose. We don't want to feel the pain of a loved one dying. We want to spend

have nothing you care about, what is even the point of surviving?" Mortis asked, looking at Azure.

Azure remained silent.

remained silent

Mortis regretted

about, but he

thoughts were normal to Mortis. He was thinking these thoughts every

never even asked herself

have to answer, and you also don't need to question yourself regarding this topic," Mortis added. "You obviously have something to live for. Otherwise, you wouldn't have had the willpower to get through

Azure said, her expression showing an internal struggle. "What

Mortis added. "Heaven made you to become powerful. You're not a human, and you don't need to have the feelings we humans have. For you, power might have a vastly stronger appeal than for us. Becoming more powerful might feel way more fulfilling

a human, and you already accepted that, right?

regretted asking his earlier question. Azure seemed to

as she looked at Mortis with confusion and

Mortis raised an eyebrow.

simply overwhelmed by something I have never felt before," Azure said. "That's why it was so difficult for me

you feel?"

kind of emptiness," Azure said. "It's like a black hole that sucks out all the drive in my being, and it feels

became uncomfortable, and he

he was very

"Hey, listen-"

I'm a Star God, and I've gone through worse. You don't need to fix me or anything. I can deal with this stuff well

all, he knew how overwhelming this feeling

immediately. Instead, she

and I felt satisfied with simply becoming more powerful. However, as soon as you brought my attention to the purpose of life, I suddenly felt this feeling I never felt

anything like this in the past. I haven't felt

Azure asked. "So, when we get a Spirit, does it also mean that our emotional concepts become more

thought

Could she be right?

now, Mortis couldn't be

then, Azure added

that managed to become Heaven's Magnates?" Azure asked. "You said you know

about it?"

one main Law always stumped me. I always tried to think of

the Law of

Mortis' eyes widened.

Right!

go about comprehending the Law

it, and he was sure that a beast

would be impossible

Heaven's Magnate if it's impossible

you can now feel

think so, but I

looked

to try?" she

Mortis froze.

That…

looked at Azure. "Could you be a bit more specific?" Mortis

all, even if I can't feel it, I know a bit about how it works, and I know that it would hurt you if I couldn't reciprocate. So, we can just try, right? If it works, we can both experience love, and if it doesn't, we can just

back of

know,"

genuinely confused. "I see no downside, only upsides. We

Then, Azure remembered something.

is it because I'm not attractive to