Lightning Is the Only Way

"There is no one that elicits these kinds of feelings from me," Mortis answered. "I see so many different Cultivators, but they all look the same to me. They are either strangers, friends, enemies, or whatever. There is no difference."

"So, do humans need some kind of connection with a stranger for love to exist in the future?" Azure asked. She was genuinely curious about all of this.

Mortis' brows furrowed. "No, not really."

"Then why does that have to exist for you to try?" Azure asked.

For the first time, Mortis didn't answer immediately.

Why didn't he just get to know more people?

Was it really necessary that his spark had to exist for a relationship to blossom?

Obviously not.

There were plenty of mortals and Cultivators that got together with people after just being friends for years on end.

There had been no romantic attraction between them in the beginning, but they had eventually ended together.

For some reason, a kind of pressure appeared in Mortis' insides.

'Is it because of my past?' he thought. 'I've felt how Gravis have felt for so long. I've felt these intense bursts of warmth and love inside myself so many times.'

Mortis looked into the distance. 'Is it because I fear disappointment? Do I fear that my eventual love won't be as vibrant as the love Gravis feels for Stella?'

A moment of silence passed.

'And then, this entire thing with Joyce happened, which confirmed my fear. I was attracted to Joyce, but I never felt anything remotely as intense as what Gravis felt for Stella back then.'

'And then, Joyce died, and I felt like my ability to love died with her.'

Mortis glanced over at Azure, who only looked into the distance with a thoughtful expression.

'I think I fear disappointment,' Mortis thought. 'It might be possible that I'm afraid of losing my hope. I can dream about how great love is and how it makes me feel, but I'm afraid that my imagination is off.'

Another moment of silence.

'If even love turns out to be a disappointment, what else is there left but greyness in my life?'

'If love doesn't live up to my expectations, what reason do I even have left to live?'

"Azure, why do you cultivate?" Mortis asked.

Azure was surprised by the question. How did Mortis even come up with that question?

"Why do I cultivate?" Azure asked.

Mortis nodded.

Azure remained silent.

"I don't know," she said after several seconds. "Honestly, I haven't really thought about it. Living just feels natural to me, and it's like something I just have to do."

"Is there something in your life that you don't want to lose, no matter what?" Mortis asked.

Azure remained silent for a bit longer as her expression became uncomfortable.

"Not really," Azure answered with an unsure voice.

fighting? Why do you keep comprehending Laws? Why do you go through the fear and pain

anything else. No Cultivator goes out and tempers themselves just for fun. We all do it out of necessity since we want to become more powerful. And why do we want to become more powerful? Because we don't want to

We don't want to feel the pain of a loved one dying. We want

you care about, what is even the point of surviving?" Mortis asked, looking at Azure. "From what you've said, you sound like you don't

Azure remained silent.

silent for several

time, Mortis regretted his

was curious about, but he

He was thinking these thoughts every

in comparison, Azure had never even asked herself that

have to answer, and you also don't need to question yourself regarding this topic," Mortis added. "You obviously

said, her expression showing an internal struggle. "What do I actually live for?

we humans have. For you, power might have a vastly stronger appeal

humans. You're not a human, and you already accepted that, right? Why search for something

regretted asking his earlier question. Azure seemed to genuinely struggle

with confusion and nervousness. "I know what you're trying to do right

Mortis raised an eyebrow.

have never felt before," Azure

you feel?"

of emptiness," Azure said. "It's like a black hole that sucks out all the drive in my being, and it feels like it's consuming my

and he felt guilty beyond

he was

"Hey, listen-"

a second," Azure interrupted Mortis. "Keep in mind that I'm not some mortal. I'm a Star God, and I've gone through worse. You don't need to fix me or anything. I can

at Azure skeptically. After all, he knew

noticed Mortis' expression, but she didn't try to convince Mortis immediately.

becoming more powerful. However, as soon as you brought my attention to the purpose of life, I suddenly felt this feeling I never felt

I wouldn't have felt anything like this in the past. I haven't felt anything even remotely like this, not even a weaker version.

get a Spirit when we become Star Gods, right?" Azure asked. "So, when we get a

also fell into thought

Could she be right?

now, Mortis couldn't

then, Azure

Magnates?" Azure asked. "You said

about it?"

main Law always stumped me. I always tried to think of a way to comprehend it, but I never came up with one. You know why? Because it

the Law

Mortis' eyes widened.

Right!

would a beast even go

of Empathy since he knew it, and he was sure that

would be impossible

if it's impossible

you think that you can now feel love like humans?"

don't know," Azure said. "I think so, but I can't be sure

looked at

try?"

Mortis froze.

That…

Azure. "Could you be

bit about how it works, and I know that it would hurt you if I couldn't reciprocate. So, we can just try, right? If it works, we can both experience love,

back of his head

know," he

are you hesitating?" Azure asked, genuinely confused. "I see no downside, only upsides.

Then, Azure remembered something.

not attractive to you?"