The beautician chuckles, apparently enjoying my torture. “Just a few more strips, and you’ll be smoother than a baby’s bottom!”

“Fantastic,” I groan, bracing myself. “Because clearly, my life’s ambition was to achieve the sleek aerodynamics of a hairless cat. Maybe we can schedule a tail wax next time?”

As another strip is ruthlessly removed, I think about the newfound breeziness I’ll experience. Forget the wind in my hair; now it’s all about the wind down there.

“Almost done, just a few more, and you’ll be perfect,” she assures me, oblivious to the inner turmoil and the plotting of revenge that’s brewing inside me.

Perfect? I’ll be lucky if I leave here and am still able to sit down. Soren owes me big time. I’m talking about lifetime supplies of chocolate, foot massages, and maybe a pet unicorn that poops delicious jello.

Rip, another piece of me gone! There’s no way all of me survived this unscathed. I swear I can feel the breeze doing a whistle–stop tour through my newly reconstructed vagina. I start to sit up, thinking she is done when she turns back to me and pushes my shoulder back down. I look at her

questionably.

“Now for the last part,” she says.

“Last part? I am pretty sure there are no parts left; you

Chapter 62

1288 Vouche

it’s not an onion; last I checked, I got no more layers left. She took

core.

can’t have any stragglers for the wedding day,” the beautician cheerfully chimes in, slathering

wax on…

in horror. “Stragglers? Wait, what part of town are we venturing to

around the back alley, dear. We aim for

my back alley waxed hadn’t even crossed

while I internally groan, thinking of how I am going to kill Soren when I get my hands

Soren

birth certificate, it was the only ID I found, she must have her wallet on her.

a sense of annoyance, the digital chime echoing

Chapter 82

into that all–too–familiar visage marred by

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