175 Chapter 175

175 Chapter 175

Seraphina’s POV 1

The question hung in the air like a guillotine blade.

*Are you still in love with Damien?*

My fork clattered onto my plate. Lasagna suddenly tasted like cardboard. Like ashes. Like every mistake I’d ever made.

“I-” My voice cracked. “That’s not-”

“Mom.” Caleb’s voice carried a warning. “Don’t.”

But Margaret wasn’t looking at him. She was looking at me with those kind, knowing eyes that saw right through every wall I’d built.

“Honey,” she said softly. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But I think maybe you need to.”

My hands were shaking. I pressed them flat against the table, trying to stop the tremors. Trying to stop the flood of memories that

threatened to drown me.

*Damien’s voice. Adrian’s laugh. Lily’s tiny hand wrapped around my finger.*

“I can’t think about them,” I whispered. The words barely made it past my lips. “If I think about them, I’ll—”

Break. Fall apart. Run back and beg them to take me even though I’m not good enough. 1

I closed my eyes.

Three years of discipline. Three years of forcing myself not to wonder. Not to imagine. Not to *feel*.

But Margaret had cracked that door open, and everything came flooding through.

“Lily’s three now,” I said, my voice breaking. “Three years old. She was just a baby when I left. She probably doesn’t even remember me.”

The tears came hot and fast. I couldn’t stop them.

“And Adrian–Adrian’s eight. He’s probably lost teeth. Learned to read chapter books. Made new friends. Grown so tall I wouldn’t

recognize him.”

My chest felt like it was splitting open. All the pain I’d been holding back for three years, all the longing and guilt and desperate love, it

all came pouring out.

me. “Do they

pulling me into her arms. “No. No, babies,

her shoulder like a child. “I abandoned

scraped back. He moved to Margaret’s side, his hand landing on my shoulder. Warm. Solid.

survived,” he said quietly. “That takes more strength

my hands. My eyes were probably

18.JA

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175 Chapter 175

“Every day for three years, I woke up and told myself I couldn’t let myself wonder.. Couldn’t

“You’d break,” Margaret finished.

“Yeah.”

Just

Robert pointed out.

laughed bitterly. “I’m supposed to just show back up? ‘Hey kids, sorry I abandoned you for

now!‘”

what I’m

him,” I whispered. “I miss Damien so much it feels like I’m missing

“Then maybe-”

my walls slamming back up. “No. I can’t

said

23

Still weak. Still not good enough for an Alpha and his

that followed was broken only by the sound of my ragged breathing and the tick of

cleared her throat, changing gears with

that forced brightness people used when trying to

honey, have you thought about dating? Maybe meeting someone

Here we

“Mom,” Caleb warned again.

Three years is a long time to be

“Margaret, please-”

“The guys at the

Brutal. Most of them

the gym?” Margaret pressed. “Coffee shops? Bookstores? Those places where normal

don’t really go to

“Why not?”

just not interested in dating right now,” I said finally. “Maybe someday. But

a look with

18/14

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