Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness Angelia

For a second day in a row, I skipped both school and work. It was easier skipping school but I felt terrible knowing someone else had to cover my shift. Still, I needed time to sort things out and my emotions were still all over the place. It exhausted me and I had to take care of myself before I added more to my plate. On a bright note, I actually got around to figuring out my next step yesterday like I had planned to.

It was hard because the next step wasn't something I was ready for but something I still needed to do. I needed answers and to get them, I had to talk to them. These past days made it clear that if I didn't speak to them, I would never truly move past it because I would always wonder why. It was the single most hardest choice I had made to grow up. When I was a kid, I thought that people over eighteen were adults but the older I got, the more I learned that it had nothing to do with

age and all to do with how you acted and how you handled difficult situations. I had always I becoming an adult because mature decision s**d a** no matter how beneficial they could be could be

dreaded

When Andy got back yesterday from picking up my stuff, he had told me about Riccardo showing

up and then Marshall. It hurt to hear about them but at the same time, it gave me hope that some

of what we had was genuine. I mean, they must have cared at least a little if they were trying to seek me out, right? Abandoning Andy and James at the dinner table, I walked to the room for privacy. Sitting down on the bed, I finally turned off the flight mode on the phone. I had avoided my phone like the plague but it was time to get my a*** in gear and deal because if it was one thing I hadn't done these past days, it was dealing with the shit that had happened. Instead, I had fully succumbed to wallowing in self-pity so much so that Andy had sent James over while he was at work just so I couldn't wallow too much. The joke was on him, James had brought a shit ton of

ice cream and we watched some movies. The saddest movie ever made in my opinion and we cried together and if that wasn't the height of wallowing, I didn't know what was.

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I clicked on the missed calls and scrolled down, seeing all the guys even Kingston who despised talking had called several times. The last call was just

back but you didn't answer. Marshall told me, we will figure it out, my bunny. We will find a way to make it work,

planned on telling me the truth? Or would he have just continued to lie if I hadn't found out? Marshall told me but you already know. Maybe not that I had

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give me a call." And then I read his third message.

even an us any longer? The thought that we weren't broke me further and I didn't know what I wanted, only that I didn't want to feel like this,

I was

after how shitty I felt after reading Riccardo's but it needed to be done. It was basically like pouring alcohol into a wound, it might hurt but it would keep the wound from festering. Marshall was right under Riccardo's and I clicked on it. Doing the same with him, I scrolled up and read from the oldest to the

and fucking idiots. It pains me to know that we were causing you to hurt and I can

and yet they hadn't. If they had told me in the beginning, maybe...maybe I would have been more inclined to

on our date and I was thinking of you. I am always thinking about

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my screen and I wiped it away as

student. You are worth the risk, you are worth everything.' My heart couldn't take this and yet I

have Andy, I know he will take care of you like we should

I

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