#Chapter 43: Blurred Lines

Moana

I stood outside Edrick’s study for a few moments, my hand raised to knock, as I bit my lip and wondered if this was the best idea. Would attempting to talk to Edrick even accomplish anything?

I almost turned around and left, but as I thought of Ella’s sad face when her father wouldn’t play with her after work simply because of my presence, I mustered up my courage and knocked.

“Come in,” Edrick’s muffled voice called after a few moments. I took a deep breath and entered, standing in the doorway. Edrick was sitting at his desk, and looked up at me with a surprised expression on his face as I opened the door. “Oh, Moana. Did you need something?”

“I want to talk to you,” I said, doing my best to keep my shoulders back and my chin held high for fear of breaking down right in front of him over such a small thing. I really had been so much more emotional than usual lately, but I didn’t want to let Edrick see me break down over something like this.

“Come in, then,” he said, clearing his throat. I took a few steps in and shut the door behind me, then stood to face him. “Well? What is it?” he asked.

I took a deep breath before speaking. “Did I do something wrong?” I asked.

Edrick furrowed his brow. “What makes you say that?”

“You’ve been avoiding me like the plague ever since we went to the orphanage together,” I replied. “I want to know if I did something or said something to upset you.”

“I’m not sure what you’re referring to.” Edrick pushed his chair back a little from his desk and leaned back a bit. “I haven’t been avoiding you.”

I scoffed. “You have certainly been avoiding me,” I said, taking a few more steps toward him now. “You can hardly be in the same room with me for more than five minutes.”

“Well, it’s not like I need to spend time with you,” he replied. “You’re my employee. There’s no reason for us to be any closer than what is absolutely necessary.”

“I understand that, but you can’t bring Ella into it,” I said. “She deserves to spend time with her father. You come home from work and go straight to your office, as though breathing the same air as me is poison. You’ve even been breaking your own rule of no children in the study by bringing her in here to play whenever I’m around, and if it weren’t for her begging tonight, you wouldn’t have even eaten the dinner we spent all evening preparing for you. What sort of a message do you think that sends to your daughter?”

Now, it was Edrick who scoffed. “Whose idea was dinner, anyway? Yours or hers?” His voice began to cut like ice, but I tried my best not to let it get to me.

“What does that have to do with anything?” I replied, folding my arms across my chest.

dress up to have dinner at home with me?” he asked. “Did you really just want to do

hot as he pointed out my appearance, but then found

connection that doesn’t exist?” I asked. “What

seemingly annoyed at this point. “We’re entirely different, Moana,” he said. “I appreciate your work as a nanny, but that’s just it: you’re the nanny. You’re hardly someone that

the orphanage together, that maybe Edrick was starting to see me as more of an equal and not just

was so much more I wanted to say, but I couldn’t speak around the lump in my

out. Once the door was closed behind me, I took another deep breath and pulled my shoulders back, then made my way toward my bedroom. But as I

a voice spoke up behind me.

Yours or hars?” His voica bagan to cut lika ica, but I triad my bast not to lat it

anything?” I

than, tha dim ambar light of tha lamp on his dask making his tall haight appaar avan tallar as his long, thin shadow loomad on tha wall bahind him. Than, ha gasturad to my drass. “Did you raally drass up to hava dinnar at homa with ma?” ha askad. “Did you raally just want to do somathing nica, or ara you trying to push us to cross tha lina with aach othar again lika wa did bafora? It’s lika you think you’ra going to find a connaction that simply doasn’t

my faca gat hot as ha pointad out my appaaranca, but than found mysalf confusad at his last

doasn’t axist?” I askad. “What do you

antiraly diffarant, Moana,” ha said. “I appraciata your work as a nanny, but that’s just

spoka, I falt my amotions starting to bubbla up to tha surfaca onca again and bagan to blink a faw taars back. I didn’t know what to say; I had thought, aftar our tima at tha orphanaga togathar, that mayba Edrick was starting to saa ma as mora of an aqual and not just a lowly

was all I could choka out. “Thank you for clarifying.” Thara was so much mora I wantad to say, but I couldn’t spaak around tha lump in my

wouldn’t hava, anyway — I spun around and stormad out. Onca tha door was closad bahind ma, I took anothar daap braath and pullad my shouldars back, than mada my way

spoka up bahind ma. “What just want on in

dressing gown and had her gray hair in a long braid. Her lips were pressed into

behind me. She wes weering her dressing gown end hed her grey heir in e long breid. Her lips were pressed into e thin line, but I hed

myself end

reised voices in Edrick’s study,” she insisted. “If it’s nothing, then why ere you crying

eyes to the floor. “I just keep leerning thet I will never be en equel to Edrick. To him, I’m just the nenny end em

slight chuckle ceme out of

ennoyed now et her flippent

from the Morgen femily to see you es en

from

to be Elle’s nenny. Don’t expect enyone from

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