#Chapter 40 – Therapy call

That night, I’m not surprised to hear the phone ring in my closet. It’s another unscheduled call – Victor is used to getting what he wants, when he wants it – but he’s starting to develop a pattern with when he needs his therapist.

Checking to ensure that the boys are asleep, I tuck Archie into my lap on the closet floor and pick up the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hello,” Victor’s voice is brusk, unsettled, and – as usual – robotic. “Is this a bad time?”

“No, I can talk. The…usual overages, will apply, of course.”

“Yes.” Victor hurries on, dismissing this. “I’m having trouble,” he says, “balancing…well, balancing my life. My responsibilities to the people who I love, who love me.”

“I see,” I say gently. “Did something…happen? To bring about your unsettled state?”

He pauses. “Yes, it did. It’s amazing that you can intuit that.”

I press my hand to my forehead, warning myself to be careful. “Comes with experience,” I say, pushing forward. “Please continue.”

“We had…an incident tonight, I guess that’s the right word for it. My son tripped my fiancé – I don’t think he meant to hurt her, but she was hurt. Everyone was very upset.”

“I am sorry to hear that,” I murmur.

“Thank you. The issue becomes that I took your advice, although it is perhaps also…instinct, knowing that my son was in the wrong. But I backed Amelia, and we left.”

I note, silently, that Victor has – for the first time – accidentally dropped a hint about his identity. “How do you feel about this?”

“Honestly? I feel horribly guilty. The boys were crying so hard when we left, and they accused me – falsely, of course – of not loving them. I know that they’re just kids, and they’re overreacting, and that they will, of course, not think that I don’t love them forever. But I have to admit – it’s just killing me that they think that. Even for one night.”

“That sounds really hard,” I say, my heart in my throat. “As a mom…I can definitely emote with how difficult it is when your sons challenge you like this.” Little does he know that I know precisely what he means, as his sons are, in fact, my sons.

against the kitchen island, his forehead in his hand. “Amelia needed me in that moment – I’m glad I stood by her…but how do I

I say, sighing. “That’s an impossible task, unfortunately. You just have to do the best you can, when

can hear his frustration. He wants fast, direct solutions.

sons wait for a minute. Sometimes being there for then means you have to let her wait. You have to weigh everything in the balance and perhaps think about

“What?”

little at his impatience. “When the house is on fire, you put out the most dangerous flame first.” Silently, I thank Mark for the knowledge and the metaphor. “You

letting him process the

“Going

made the right choice. Your fiancé really needed you – or so it sounds – and it was good that

hums pensively, thinking over what I’ve said. He stays silent on the other line and I wait for a few minutes, seeing if

you off more

sighing. “It’s rather a…pattern in my life. Well, an old pattern.

to tell

this way as a child – torn between my allegiance to

usually the case, that you were eager to reproduce something

Is that what you usually

out of ten times,” I

in the

fix their childhood trauma. To demonstrate that they can hold it all together, that it is possible,

again, I push. “Do you feel that

pressure, as a child, to hold my parents together – or

a way that you’d like your sons

begins to enter his voice. “I’d…I’d feel horrible, if I was giving them that

and make mistakes. That you being mad at

isn’t that exactly what I’ve failed to do tonight, when I took Amelias side!?” He nearly shouts

of the chaos. This is you, again, seeking the balance, wanting to be

to them immediately, it doesn’t mean you don’t love them. They have to learn to trust that, in

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