#Chapter 113 – The Note

I struggle to get free from underneath my blankets and children. I haven’t heard from Edgar since our visit to the Beta camp, despite many calls and texts.

“No, it’s okay,” Edgar says, closing the door behind him and taking a few steps into the living room. “Don’t get up – I don’t mean to disturb you.”

I ignore him, pulling myself free and standing up. I take two steps towards him, but he puts out a hand to stop me. “Please, Evelyn,” he says softly.

“We’ll give you some space,” Victor says, standing up and putting out a hand for each of the boys.

“No, Sir,” Edgar says. “I’d like to speak with you as well, if you don’t mind.”

Frowning, Victor nods. “Boys, upstairs please. We need a moment of privacy.”

The boys, sensing that something is up, nod and head up the stairs, giving Edgar little waves as they go.

“Thank you,” Edgar says, meeting each of their eyes. I can see that he is anxious.

“Edgar, why haven’t you answered my texts and my calls? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Evelyn,” he says, meeting my eyes, his own filled with emotion. I can tell that whatever he’s going to say, it’s hard for him. And, well, I think I know what’s coming. I bite my lip.

“Listen,” Edgar says, heaving out a breath and running a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to make this anymore dramatic and awkward than…well, than it already is.” He gives us a little smile. “But I have noticed that there is something…between you two.”

Victor simply puts his hands in his pockets but I take a few steps forward, putting out my hands to him. “Edgar, no –“

“Please,” he says, putting his hands up again, holding me off. I stop and slowly lower my hands, my heart in my throat. “Please, I’m not accusing you of anything, or trying to force you two to…take any steps, or have any conversations, if that’s not where you are.”

He sighs and again runs his hands through his hair. I’ve never seen him so at a loss. “God,” he murmurs. “I should have practiced this or something. What I’m trying to say is that no matter what is happening between you two,” he gestures, here, at the space between Victor and I, “I’m going to need to move on.”

I open my mouth to speak but he looks to me, pleading in his eyes. I close my mouth. He’s right. I haven’t been faithful to him, I haven’t been good to him, and…well, even if there is something good between Edgar and I, he is right.

There is something between Victor and me as well. Something that I need to sort through before I could ever consider a true and honest relationship with someone else.

My eyes fill with tears. Edgar shakes his head at me, his own face full of emotion. I can tell that he’s barely holding it together himself.

I look away, trying to save him from it. He deserves at least that.

moment,

hold out a folded piece of paper. I hear Victor take a few steps forward,

ones, I’m sorry I can’t be more exact, I haven’t been there in a while, but they’re accurate. They’re to help

pulled himself together more than I have. He stands with his shoulders back, meeting

she can help you two understand…whatever it is

mean?” Victor says,

I mean. Just…if you want to know more,

places the folded

deep breath. “I’d like to tender

of air. Victor’s face likewise the picture of shock, though he says

me take his hand. “Please, Evelyn,” he says softly, looking me in the eye. “This is…this is hard enough for me. I can let you go, but I can’t…I

leave. You’re such a valuable member of my team and…and my friend. Please,” he puts out a pleading hand, “there must be something we can do – we can have you permanently assigned to the

Edgar says, straightening and dropping my hand. “I’ve made my decision. I’m going to go,

shakes his head, disappointed, and then pinches the bridge of his

can’t approve it, Beta. You’re a member of my pack, a valuable one, and

could be so cruel.

six months of paid leave,” Victor says, returning his gaze to Edgar’s face. “No responsibilities or obligations. You’re free of command, free to do as you will, but you’ll still have the protection

thinks about this carefully, and

Sir.” Edgar says, snapping a salute. “This

all the weight of the pack, with no responsibilities, at full pay. It’s a well-deserved

please,” I say, stepping forward one more time. “I’m so

time, pressing his lips together as he studies my face. “It’s

find frustratingly cryptic, he pulls his hand away

as the door closes feeling…strangely gutted, empty. Edgar has been so important to me for so many months now –

Evelyn?” Victor’s voice is

to look at him, tears in my eyes. “I don’t know.” I say, quite serious. I can’t parse my feelings at all. Part of me knows that this was the right thing, but another

going to

he can’t not, he takes a few steps forward and gently wipes my tears away with his thumb. “It’s okay,” he says, very softly. “He’ll be all

him, sniffing and trying not

little awkward, at the bottom of the stairs. A moment

wrap them in a big hug, one I very much need.

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