Chapter 111

Being home had been the best thing for me. Back in LA, I felt so suffocated and restricted.

We had been home all of two weeks and I could sort of feel myself coming back to normal. My body was still healing from the miscarriage and I was in no hurry to speed up the process.

My therapist told me that I just needed to move with the motions of it all. There was no race for me to get better and I just needed to be gentle. And so I decided to be kinder to myself.

I sat by the pool with my feet dipped in the water The warm sun beamed down on my face, warming my skin. I tilted my head upward to feel more of its warmth when a shadow was cast over my face.

1 peered through my glasses and saw my husband with my daily green juice that he had been making for me. He had become obsessed with finding natural remedies to help my body through the process. I hated the taste but he drank it with me so I was not too opposed to it.

He leaned down and kissed my lips softly before coming to sit next to me, handing me the cup, and clinking the glasses,

I made a face when I saw the little concoction with the froth at the top. “How many more days are we going to be drinking this gunk?”

“It’s not gunk, it’s health juice. I need to make sure that you’re getting all your nutrients in, baby. So drink up.”

I pinched my nose and downed the thing. He followed suit, finishing his in less than ten seconds. When I was done I went to get up and get something to wash out the taste but he was already holding a piece of gum out to me.

“Always prepared,” I popped into my mouth with a smile. “Thank you.”

I leaned my head on his shoulder and allowed the calm of the surroundings to wash over me. There was not a moment I had been here had I ever felt the roar of the storm I had left behind.

I remember my grandmother once said that if you change the environment the flower is in you may see it blossom. And I think the same could be said for humans. You cannot heal from the same place that poisoned you. You need to get into cleaner air so you breathe better. And I was.

I could finally breathe and the hurt didn’t feel so compounded anymore.

thoughts?” his gentle voice brushed past my

so at peace here. I feel like myself again or

fingers through mine. “That’s all I ever

was a heaviness that passed between us and I knew what it was and we needed to address

a long overdue

“For what?”

halfway across

“I wanted to.”

knew he would

it comes to me. You are the same man that waited decades for me to finally see him, to finally see what we could be. You have always been patient with me. You always placed my needs above your own which meant you had to sacrifice a

I spoke the more my heart drummed

to give up so

him. He never deserved to be uprooted the way he had. And all the other little things that followed. Us moving to LA had almost been our ruin and I had risked losing the most precious thing to me just so I could chase a

I could go back in time I would do it all over again for you because that is how much

on my cheek and yet another flurry of butterflies filled

times over for you because that is where you are meant to be

work.”

Chapter !!!

“But as “”

arched an eyebrow in

had been doing over the last few days had led me to this thinking “I don’t know if LA is what I want anymore I don’t know if it’s something that will be good for me

don’t want to do

“I don’t know”

And now with us

couldn’t bring myself to do it. I wanted to stay in this little safe haven a little while longer. I didn’t

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