Chapter 117

Yachting all over the Mediterranean had been an absolute dream. I loved being out on the water and seeing the crystal blue skies every single morning. Waking up to crashing waves and a gentle sea breeze was absolutely magical.

I could have stayed out there for years and years and never grown tired. But I felt rejuvenated and ready to tackle some more work. I shifted in my seat as the people on set helped me to get the mic fixed.

Today was the first official interview for the movie. The trailer was due to drop within the next two or so hours and I was more than excited to finally release this baby into the world. There was a huge weight on my shoulders because people expected this movie to be good. And they had every right to. The book had been a major success and I wanted the movie to follow suit. The fan base deserved a stellar movie.

But not only was this interview important for the movie, it was also important for me. This was going to be the first public thing that I did. Everyone had just been catching glimpses of me as I milled around the streets of Los Angeles. But now they were going to hear from me for the very first time since my miscarriage. It had been almost three months since then and I had healed some

The necklace that my husband had gotten me rested on my chest. The fact that our baby was no longer alive was an incredibly painful fact to come to terms with. But I was finally in a much better place than I was before.

“Okay, we are ready here, Adelaide.” Emily, the interviewer, smiled at me. “If at any point in time you feel like you cannot continue please let me know and I will gladly shift the conversation or I will end the interview.

I nodded feeling grateful that I had made the right decision on picking which interviewer I wanted first. There were a lot of people who wanted to get a story out of me but I was not ready to delve that deeply and I didn’t think I ever would be.

The rest of the crew readied the lights and made sure that all the cameras were pointing in the right direction. We got the countdown from 10 and my heart raced in my chest. I had been over this with Damon multiple times.

Just breathe through it. It’s not life or death, you are fine.

I repeated his words to myself inside of my head.

And the camera began to roll.

it

for

and hoped that this wouldn’t be the shit

had been so gracious and kind to me, she didn’t delve into topics that I didn’t want to speak about, something that I

off my shoes so that I could lounge on the couch while I waited for my husband to get home, I was hit

to brace myself against the wall to keep myself upright. My hand came

all but nothing was working. My stomach churned and I had to cover my mouth with my hand to keep myself from spilling all the contents inside of my stomach. I raced toward the bathroom and made it to the

didn’t understand where that had come from. I leaned my head against the wall of the bathroom loving the way the marble cooled my heated

made it to my feet and stumbled to the sink. I turned on the water and washed my hands

hoping to wake my

pale as a ghost’s eyes had dark circles under them.

I had felt anything similar to this I

this way now hit me like a ton of bricks. I stood there frozen with the water still coming out of the faucet and my mind trying to calculate the days.

was no way I was

I rushed up the stairs taking them two at a time until I came to our bathrooms. I rummaged through the cabinets digging for the pregnancy test that I

heart was racing. I had no idea what

even trying to have a child. In fact, the last thing we wanted was a child. I was still healing from the last time and I

be an eternity. The box said that it would take 10 minutes for me to get a result. But the minutes felt like years and I was left with nothing but

But after the miscarriage, I worried about what my next pregnancy would bring. Would I face the same challenges? Would my body even be ready to carry another child? Was my heart even ready

in my arms, new and ready for the world. I still mourned for him, I still missed

voice carried into the bathroom as he entered

my voice came out

his eyes already filled with worry from the tone in my voice. He saw me standing by the counter with my elbows

of me. At first, he didn’t

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