Chapter 155

Intense-1

The next day, I'm tidying up my room after a shower and before dinner. I grab a sweater I have on my bedside table and in the process, my phone falls on the floor.

It flashes on and the numbers from the corner of the screen stare back at me.

My heart goes into overdrive.

They're small, unassuming, but they define my entire life at this point.

February 14th.

I've been avoiding my phone all day for this exact reason. I didn't want to be reminded. And now I'm here, in the suffocating quiet, trying not to drown in it.

Burning rubber and gasoline.

The crunch of metal folding in on itself.

Flashing lights. Red, white, blue, like a strobe in the middle of the nightmare.

The images and memories bombard me, and I struggle to breathe.

I wrap myself tighter in the blanket I stole off the bed, dragging it with me like a shield as

I step onto the balcony of my room. The cold air bites at my face, but I welcome it.

It's sharp, cold... completely opposite to that day as I watched the first responders check my family for signs of life.

hot that day, burning

panic was too

knees pulled up to my chest, staring out into nothing. It's so dark and without lights

beautiful.

fuss. But it's the guilt that gets me.

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intense 1

press my face into the blanket, trying to silence the sound that escapes

I'm pathetic.

that makes me lift my

voice is

soon as I see him. My body exhales without permission. Anyone else I might have faked a smile for. Lied.

me think I don't need

eyes soften when he steps out onto the balcony, barefoot despite the

knows. It feels like he always knows what I'm feeling

don't say anything; I

crouches down and scoops me up, blanket and all.

his arms solid and warm as they fold

in his chest, letting myself melt into him, breathing

of

cologne. It smells like something

he asks after a moment, his fingers

head. He nods and just holds

if wanting to say something. I feel his body tense under me. Not in a way that makes me pull away, but enough that

wrong?" I ask,

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