Secrets of Us A Forbidden Love Romance (Alina)

Chapter 230

Secrets of Us: A Forbidden Love Romance

Not Fixed

Zaid and I stay in the living room longer than we probably should, sitting in the quiet of everything that's happened. The house feels heavier now and part of me feels like I've ruined everything.

His arm is draped along the back of the couch behind me, his thigh brushing mine. My heart races as I focus on that small touch. It might seem so insignificant, but it's like food

to a starving man.

We sit in silence, neither of us saying anything, but I don't complain. The silence is needed and his presence is enough.

Eventually, I sit up straighter, wiping my face with the sleeve of my shirt. "I'm gonna head up to bed."

Zaid shifts beside me. "Are you gonna be okay?"

I nod, offering a faint smile. "I'll deal with it."

It's the only honest answer I have. I lean in and press a kiss to his cheek, my lips brushing his skin for just a second too long.

"Thank you for sitting here with me."

His eyes trace the side of my face. "I feel like we need a do over for our birthday."

That makes me smile for real. "I wouldn't be opposed to that."

I try to get up, but his fingers curl gently around my wrist, stopping me.

He takes a breath like he's about to say something difficult. "I'm here for you, love."

My heart stutters. I meet his eyes, and all I see there is sincerity. There's no expectation, just him.

I nod, placing my hand lightly over his before managing to slip away. "I know."

I head upstairs, into the quiet of my room. The door clicks shut behind me, and I

half expect the weight of it all to crash over me, but it doesn't,

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I crawl into bed, and I sigh. The sheets are cool against my skin.

they never come.

sad.

my mind. The way he yelled. The way his voice cracked. The look in his eyes when

know he could be

the guilt in me settles like a

sleep finds me. It's restless and shallow and full of blurry dreams

still gray blue and my body moves before my

catches up.

out of bed, down the hall, then down the stairs.

kitchen island with my journal, flipping past pages already inked

my

of chaos and hope. I click

thought onto the

everything about Jake, about Elena, about Zaid. About the way

I think maybe

stretch, close the journal, and head toward the coffee machine. The smell of fresh grounds calms me before the first drip even hits the

buzzes on the counter,

Aiden.

my face, and

he says, a little breathless. "Sorry I didn't call yesterday. Practice ran late, and then we had a special training session for those of us looking to impress

">

laugh softly, “Aiden, it's okay. Your voice

Elena and my therapy, like I always

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always does. Then I breathe in,

and I broke

can practically hear the way he tenses. Then he

went to see you. But I didn't know that's how

admit. "It just happened.

though he can't

And it's only like a month and a half until I'm there,

chest aches in a warm way.

hang up just as Zaid walks

eyes.

beeline for the coffeepot.

smile at him, taking

a cup, then adds a little milk and honey into mine and