Chapter 86: I Can’t Have His Child

Hanna

I didn’t bother to hang my coat up on the hook as I staggered through the door to the small cabin I shared with Kacidra. I tossed the coat to the floor, the thick fabric falling on the wide-plank floorboards in a wet snowy heap.

Kacidra wasn’t home. She had spent the last two nights with Pete, who was living in one of the cabins in the village. They were mates, and the connection had been intense, passionate. I saw the pattern, of course. Troy and Maeve. Ernest and Gemma. Even Keaton, the man who was the captain of the boat that both kidnapped and saw Maeve to safety, had found his mate in Maeve’s friend Myla.

Everyone on this prophesied path was finding their mates, including me. This was the definition of fate.

Apparently, Rowan and Maeve were at the center of it all. And then, there was my role.

| sunk to the floor in front of the couch, my head in my hands, and let myself cry.

I felt nothing but deep, painful guilt after listening to the unnamed old woman’s words. She was my great-aunt, my tie to Gayla, the Seer… Gayla, who must have known what my mother would become and the powers she held, the powers

she would give to one of her children.

I thought of the white roses on the temple grounds, how their

petals had littered the stone pavers after Tasia had destroyed the sanctuary. Tasia, who the people of Lycenna were afraid of but also worshiped. The same way they wanted to worship me.

The people who believed my future child would be the Moon Goddess herself.

But I didn’t have my powers any longer. I didn’t want them back. And I wouldn’t be the Goddess’s vessel of rebirth.

I peeked through my fingers, my eyes clouded with tears.

There was only one thing I could do to end the prophecy, to break the chain of events that were plaguing a family I had grown to love.

I needed to reject Rowan.

I sucked in my breath and wiped the tears from my cheeks, nodding at myself as I silently agreed to the inevitable.

But then there was a knock on the front door, and then a cold rush of air.

“Hanna? Goddess, it’s freezing in here,” Rowan crossed the threshold of the front door, shutting it firmly behind him before stalking toward the neglected wood stove.

I watched him in silence as he crouched in front of it, stoking the dying embers with pieces of kindling until a fire erupted from the ashes once again. He meticulously added pieces of split birch to the woodstove, arranging them in such a way that guaranteed a slow, hot burn. I couldn’t help but smile as | watched him, my heart squeezing in my chest.

Rowan, my Rowan.

He turned around, seeing me sitting against the foot of the couch. “What’s wrong? Are you alright? Maeve told me what happened at the castle.” He stepped forward, kneeling down in front of me and taking my chilled fingers in his.hands. “You’ re cold, Hanna.”

“I have to go home,” I whispered unsure if I meant for him to hear it or if I just needed to say the words aloud.

so that he faced me with his arms wrapped around his knees, ‘To

I

“Why?”

mate, Rowan. There’s too much… too much at stake. I can’t

is going to happen?”

lingered behind his eyes, something that

much as she wants the

  1. go. I need to bring the stones with me when I do. You cannot follow.”

you to do that.” The firmness in his voice sent a chill up my spine. I looked up at him, his face distorted by the strands of hair

together. The consequences are too great. If we

old woman said? About our child being the second-coming of the Goddess? Come

after everything that’s already happened? A year ago you were just

back now. I won’t let you run. I won’t let you sacrifice

“Your family,”

fend for themselves. They are more than capable of defeating a single wolf. Lycenna is in shambles from what we understand. They are no longer a pack, or a cult, whatever you want to call it! Mom is seeing to the refugees for

wolf. She was powerful enough to mortally wound your mother. A

is the keeper of the

to

only inches from mine, his blue eyes pleading with my own. No,

his hands and kissed me,

to cry as he pulled away, not wanting

  1. to.

I opened my mouth to his, letting him pull me close and wrap

go,” he said in a raspy voice, his words tickling the skin on my neck. His mouth moved along my jaw, his

was chilled despite the heat of the woodstove, but his hands were warm against my back. He ran his fingers up my spine, sending sparks flying across my skin.

of light through

back, forcing me closer, my breasts pressing into his chest as I kissed him deeply. He was gentle with his touches as he explored me, his mouth moving from mine to my neck to my collarbone, lingering

let my breath out in a long, pleading moan as the sensation awakened something deep within me. Something I had been holding back

the only invitation

then stood from the couch, holding me against him as he carried me through the living room and into

into my room, shutting the door with his foot before tossing me on the bed. My heart was pounding against my ribs as he took a step back, looking down at me. Heat flashed behind his eyes as he reached down, his fingers lingering on his belt buckle. I stared at him, taking him in. Trying to

say yes… to say anything. I swallowed back the mingled fear and despair threatening to take hold of me, and

bed. I tried to keep my eyes on his face, afraid to let them wander. This was it for us. I wanted to remember the way he

my panties. I was totally bare, completely exposed to him now. I didn’t try to hide myself. I closed my eyes as he looked at me, and I was able to feel his gaze move from my eyelids

way his hands ran down the length of my thigh, his thumb pressing into the flesh behind my knee felt like the work

because the way he touched me in all the right places felt as

time. I felt electric. His touch sent sparks shooting down my legs and

tears threatening to spill over my lashes as I opened my mouth. He ran his tongue along my lower lip, nibbling it

my legs, his fingers gliding against the growing wetness. Nothing had ever felt better than his touch

“Rowan,” I breathed, “please…”

didn’t know for sure. Every second of pain and ecstasy was all part of a drawn-out goodbye. He said my name, the sound of it on his lips sending me

hung high in the cloudless sky. Rowan was sleeping with his arm around me, his fingers limp against my hip bone where I lay turned into

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