Chapter 42: I Killed Him

*Lena*

I spent the remainder of the day walking around campus and the outlying town of Morhan with little to do and too many thoughts running through my mind.

I was graduating, that was clear, and in less than a week I'd be on a flight to Avondale to reunite with my family. My phone call with Oliver had been brief. My aunt and uncle wanted nothing more than to talk to me, and we didn't have much privacy. But it was obvious he was starting to crumble under the weight of his situation.

We both knew fleeing the scene entirely wasn't the answer. We'd have to grit our teeth and get through Winter Solstice and the events surrounding the wedding of who he still believed was the love of his life and his brother.

And then there was that strange woman standing in as the dean and her questions about Xander. I couldn't have answered even if I tried. I barely knew him. I realized that more and more with each passing day.

I had no idea when he was coming to fetch me from my apartment and what we'd be doing or even talking about.

Reeling, that's what I was. I was reeling, and nothing was helping.

I stopped in front of a shop sometime in the late afternoon. The sun was starting to set, golden light flooding between the buildings and casting long shadows over the snow piles lining the sidewalks. I looked at the dress that was on display; long and modern, with an empire west and deep burgundy organza fabric trailing to the floor. It had a full shirt, an off-the-shoulder neckline, and long, loose sleeves that tapered at the wrists.

I could think of nothing else but the dress for a moment and sighed with relief as I pressed my hand to the frosted window. There was even a tiara to match, but the gems were likely fake. Thick, oval-shaped rubies were set in gold, and I imagined the tiara on my head, my hair woven through the star-shaped notches on the base of the crown.

I walked inside the shop, looking at nothing but the dress as a woman walked to my side.

"Try it on," she said. "I know that color will look perfect on you."

"I don't need to try it on." I replied, starry eyed as I ran my fingers over the fine fabric. Red. Blood red. Blood red at my cousin's wedding. Why the hell not?

The shop girl was surprised but didn't question me as I reached for my wallet and pulled out a handful of paper bills. Her eyes were wide as I paid in full, probably wondering how a college student dressed in a three-season old parka and faded flannel could afford such an expensive dress. A few minutes later the dress was packed into a box, and she slid it across the counter, arching her brow.

"Would you like this shipped anywhere? Or are you taking it home-"

"Shipped, please, if it can reach its destination in a week's time."

"That won't be a problem," she replied, but her pen paused as she took down the address I provided, then my name. She looked up at me, sudden understanding flickering across her delicate features. She curtsied low, bobbing her head.

"I didn't realize-"

"It's alright," I said lightly, giving her a soft, genuine smile as she straightened to her full height. She was a little pale. She nodded, looking as though she was about to burst into tears.

people ran into the Princess

been seen

***

dinner and a bottle of wine. I was making my way back to my

Xander. I was expecting him,

But it wasn't Xander.

throat tightened into a knot. Adrenaline rushed through me,

your little shopping spree?" he hissed, closing the distance between

head, I thought. I could push him into the street. I could

him. He grabbed the hood of my parka,

screeched, but

into the dark, where we couldn't be seen from the street. "We

against him until he loosened his hold on me, but I was still in his clutches, and he

by the street light. I

in the snow and I

cried in the event he was nearby, hopefully closing in on my

me.

couldn't always be around to finish my

to my feet, cursing under his breath as I let my body go limp and refused to

b***h! I'll drag you.

what was happening and tried to fight it like usual, but only for a second. What if I just... gave in to it, this power, this energy I didn't

cradling me like a child, his fingers digging into my parka

watched it, my head lolling on

unforgiving. From far away I heard Slate scream, his voice mingled with a buzzing

alley, alone. Fresh snow blanketed my body, and my cheeks were wet from where it had melted against my

full dark, and the groceries I had dropped where thickly covered with snow. I rose to my knees, flexing my hands and

Slate, I thought, a feeling of dread washing

that he didn't deserve it, but still. I might have

of violence or struggle. He was

one wall of the alleyway for support as I trudged through the snow. So much snow.

to move.

a sound around me; even the buzzing

store closed at midnight, and snow had already piled up in front of

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