Strings of Fate

Strings of Fate

Cam 54- Interest and intention

I try to be patient, I really do. But I’ve been waiting all week to see Harry and now he’s just standing there and not saying anything. He looks completely miserable. If he’s so unhappy why doesn’t he do something about it? He looks like he has something that he wants to say so why isn’t he talking? He’s never been one to hold his words back before, and I just made a total fool of myself pouring my heart out to him. Is it really so hard for him to just talk to me? I lose my patience.

“Stop holding back and just ask me your question. Whatever it is you want from me, whatever you want to know, just ASK!” My words are demanding but my tone makes it sound more like I’m begging. I can’t quite bring myself to care.

“You really want to know what I want…” Harry starts. His voice is agitated and he runs a hand through his hair, shoving his hood back as he does. He takes a step towards me. I’m standing on the top of the little stairs leading up to my home and he’s at the bottom but he’s so much taller than me that it actually makes us about eye level.

“I want to know if I can love you. If you will actually let me.” His words come out in a single burst, like he’s been holding them in for too long. As soon as he says them, his shoulders slump and his eyes drop to the ground again. I don’t understand what he’s asking.

“I don’t understand. Shouldn’t you be asking if I love you? You’ve told me in the past that’s

what you want. Is it not true anymore?” I try to understand what he’s telling me but I don’t know what he wants anymore. Harry straightens his shoulders and his stunning blue eyes stare into mine. I can feel his magic pushing through me leaving me with weak knees and a desperate need to throw myself at him and kiss him silly. I resist the urge, but only because I’m not totally sure that’s actually what he wants. I might be misinterpreting things.

“No, I’m not asking if you love me, I’m not sure if you ever will. But I’ve been thinking these last few days. I thought the worst thing would be that you might never want me, but it’s not. Being away from you was the worst thing. Only seeing your smile in pictures and having to

imagine how you sound when you compl hout customers or get excited about a potion…

it was horrible. I tried to stay away, I promised myself that I would. That I would get over you and move on because there is no point wasting my life on someone who won’t even trust me.

But I can’t do it and I don’t want to anymore. I’ve thought about it a lot and in every relationship there is always someone who cares more, so it might as well be me. I can’t stop

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you, regardless of our actual relationship, and I’ll just have to hope that one day you might actually grow to want me back the same way I want you.” He barely pauses before continuing. Now that he’s started talking

take my time and actually get to know you and learn what you like. I never thought I would enjoy it so much but I do.” He sighs wistfully

asking… what exactly? If he can just be my friend? I don’t want to just be his friend! And has he seriously still not realised what his magic has

at reading the signs. I think it’s probably about time I just spell it out for him. I’m sick of all the misunderstandings. I’ll tell him the complete truth about everything, then he can decide what he actually wants without any confusion about how I feel.

Well I fully intend to answer your question. But before I do, I feel like there are

to you. First… your magic DOES affect me. Like a lot. I’ve been half

I start.

can’t be right. I’ve seen how my magic affects people, and

I don’t think it’s possible that you would have rejected me for so long. You would have invited me to your bed ages ago. I’d give basically anything if it meant I could have you and I can’t see

told you before, at first I thought that you only wanted me physically and I wasn’t willing to give myself up like that. Then once I realised you wanted more than that

the

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would caring mean you CAN’T be with me? Shouldn’t it mean the opposite? Why wouldn’t you just accept me?” He demands. I’m quiet when I

answer.

I give in… eventually you’ll leave me for good. I’ve thought about it and

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54- Interest

that I don’t think I’m

time that we’re meant to be together. That

it.” He insists.

it’s fated to last.” I start to cry. Just a few tears but my frustration is leaking through. Harry reaches out and wipes

to think of it that way. When