Stronger by Ang Chris

Chapter 16

I felt so displayed and exposed. He had walked away again. I tried to stop from crying but anger, frustration, and vulnerability overflowed.

I sunk to my feet covering my mouth keeping all sounds inside. I let them flow down.

*I’m going to cry. I’m going to be upset. This is not what I wanted. Then I’m going to stand up and make sure he doesn’t

see.

I gasped and pressed my l*ps shut. I cleaned up my face. I dried my hair. This is not what I had expected. This is not what I want.

1

I finished getting myself ready. I put on baggy clothes wanting to forget he’d seen it all and backed away.

He was in Brians’s room when I got out there and I ate my breakfast in silence. Thankfully I did not have to the scorn on his face.

2

I grabbed some of my favorite books from the trunk of the car sitting in my seat and putting in my earbuds turning them up all the way.

I wanted the stories I knew to have a happy ending. I wanted to know if it would all work out for a moment. I would not look at him again. I would not give him an opening to humiliate me.

Resentment, fury, disgust, and embarrassment swilled and stormed chasing around inside of me. I felt like I was suffocating in it all. 1

When we got to the hotel that night I placed a blank card on my face. I would not give away anything.

“Anna?” Ella knocked on the door of my room as we were getting ready to go to dinner.

“Come in,” I took a deep breath and turned to put my hair up halfway to keep it out of my face.

“Are you okay?” she sat down on the bed.

I froze, terrified of what was to follow. He hadn’t. Please tell me he hadn’t.

“Why do you ask?” I closed my eyes trying to stay calm.

“You’ve been so quiet today. I thought you’d be excited we’re finally in Canada. I know we’re barely across the border but.” she shrugged looking at me as if I should explain. “This morning you didn’t say a word and you looked so. Sad or angry I don’t know but you seem upset,”

fine,” I shrugged as nonchalantly as I

her. He kept his dismissal of me

2

worried about. He’s my

6

home,” I falsely responded. Smiling so she

eat some good food and then tomorrow you’ll meet

I didn’t realize how used to the affection I

“Of course,”

3

men had taken it

and steak medallions with bearnaise sauce and a

if he thought I didn’t see his quick and frequent glances my way he

left me there n*ked. How did he expect

2

and as we walked up to the room he placed his hand on my back and I moved away from

once.

walk away from me like that. In a moment that was pure and happy and intimate‘ and you broke

1

I did not want to be anywhere near him. I changed into my pajamas and

know this morn-”

don’t want to hear it,” I crawled into bed rolling over and turning off the

the light in again. “I know

couldn’t control myself,”

sorry it happened,” I sat up and looked him in the eyes, crossing

I am trying to be

you can’t do something don’t start something. You have no idea how I felt after you left. I’m sorry that this is so hard for you but until you

1

had heard me yelling so she accepted me with a

the blankets and snuggled in and she sat next to me. I knew she wanted to say something. It probably wasn’t easy to see

Grayson

ready I think enough time had passed and her resolves had

and we all are lucky to have him. I know it’s a hard task but if you give him time I know he will

2

out of everyone I had met so far

now jeeps. The road to his pack was