Stronger by Ang Chris

Chapter 16

I felt so displayed and exposed. He had walked away again. I tried to stop from crying but anger, frustration, and vulnerability overflowed.

I sunk to my feet covering my mouth keeping all sounds inside. I let them flow down.

*I’m going to cry. I’m going to be upset. This is not what I wanted. Then I’m going to stand up and make sure he doesn’t

see.

I gasped and pressed my l*ps shut. I cleaned up my face. I dried my hair. This is not what I had expected. This is not what I want.

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I finished getting myself ready. I put on baggy clothes wanting to forget he’d seen it all and backed away.

He was in Brians’s room when I got out there and I ate my breakfast in silence. Thankfully I did not have to the scorn on his face.

2

I grabbed some of my favorite books from the trunk of the car sitting in my seat and putting in my earbuds turning them up all the way.

I wanted the stories I knew to have a happy ending. I wanted to know if it would all work out for a moment. I would not look at him again. I would not give him an opening to humiliate me.

Resentment, fury, disgust, and embarrassment swilled and stormed chasing around inside of me. I felt like I was suffocating in it all. 1

When we got to the hotel that night I placed a blank card on my face. I would not give away anything.

“Anna?” Ella knocked on the door of my room as we were getting ready to go to dinner.

“Come in,” I took a deep breath and turned to put my hair up halfway to keep it out of my face.

“Are you okay?” she sat down on the bed.

I froze, terrified of what was to follow. He hadn’t. Please tell me he hadn’t.

“Why do you ask?” I closed my eyes trying to stay calm.

“You’ve been so quiet today. I thought you’d be excited we’re finally in Canada. I know we’re barely across the border but.” she shrugged looking at me as if I should explain. “This morning you didn’t say a word and you looked so. Sad or angry I don’t know but you seem upset,”

fine,” I shrugged as nonchalantly as I could.

tell her. He kept his dismissal of me to

2

He’s my aloha but you’ll

6

“Just missing home,” I falsely responded.

they’ll love you. I’m sure that it is hard leaving your home but don’t worry. Let’s eat some good food and then tomorrow you’ll meet

care for me. I didn’t realize how used to the affection I

“Of course,”

3

it upon themselves to order the biggest

and steak medallions with bearnaise sauce and a side of shrimp. The food was

didn’t see his quick

me there n*ked. How did he expect me

2

he placed his hand on my back and I moved

once.

away from me like that. In a moment that was pure and happy and intimate‘ and you broke

1

room and I hurried into the bedroom. I did not want to be anywhere near him. I changed into my pajamas

know this morn-”

into bed rolling over and turning off

turning the light in again. “I know it was.

control

were sorry it happened,” I sat up and looked him in the eyes, crossing my arms over

his eyes, annoyed with me.” I am trying to be respectful

pretend that you’re trying to be respectful. I don’t know what it is that’s stopping you but if you can’t do something don’t start something. You have no idea how I felt after you left. I’m sorry that this is so hard for you but until you can recognize it’s hard for me you can refrain from speaking to me and being anywhere near me!” I got up and walked out of the room and decided to

1

had heard me yelling so she accepted me with a hug and

something. It probably wasn’t easy to see your leaders argue when they had just found each other but she

and ate together, Grayson keeping a distance as

time had passed and her

are lucky to have him. I know it’s a

2

us and she cared about him. Grayson evoked strong loyalty out of everyone I had met so far and that was a good sign of his character. I just couldn’t understand why that didn’t apply to me as well.

were now jeeps. The