Stronger by Ang Chris

Chapter 16

I felt so displayed and exposed. He had walked away again. I tried to stop from crying but anger, frustration, and vulnerability overflowed.

I sunk to my feet covering my mouth keeping all sounds inside. I let them flow down.

*I’m going to cry. I’m going to be upset. This is not what I wanted. Then I’m going to stand up and make sure he doesn’t

see.

I gasped and pressed my l*ps shut. I cleaned up my face. I dried my hair. This is not what I had expected. This is not what I want.

1

I finished getting myself ready. I put on baggy clothes wanting to forget he’d seen it all and backed away.

He was in Brians’s room when I got out there and I ate my breakfast in silence. Thankfully I did not have to the scorn on his face.

2

I grabbed some of my favorite books from the trunk of the car sitting in my seat and putting in my earbuds turning them up all the way.

I wanted the stories I knew to have a happy ending. I wanted to know if it would all work out for a moment. I would not look at him again. I would not give him an opening to humiliate me.

Resentment, fury, disgust, and embarrassment swilled and stormed chasing around inside of me. I felt like I was suffocating in it all. 1

When we got to the hotel that night I placed a blank card on my face. I would not give away anything.

“Anna?” Ella knocked on the door of my room as we were getting ready to go to dinner.

“Come in,” I took a deep breath and turned to put my hair up halfway to keep it out of my face.

“Are you okay?” she sat down on the bed.

I froze, terrified of what was to follow. He hadn’t. Please tell me he hadn’t.

“Why do you ask?” I closed my eyes trying to stay calm.

“You’ve been so quiet today. I thought you’d be excited we’re finally in Canada. I know we’re barely across the border but.” she shrugged looking at me as if I should explain. “This morning you didn’t say a word and you looked so. Sad or angry I don’t know but you seem upset,”

shrugged as nonchalantly as

didn’t tell her. He kept his dismissal of me to

2

that’s what you’re worried about. He’s my aloha but you’ll

6

falsely responded. Smiling so

they’ll love you. I’m sure that it is hard leaving your home but don’t worry. Let’s eat some good food and then tomorrow

for me. I didn’t realize

“Of course,”

3

had taken it upon themselves to order the biggest steaks in

and steak medallions with bearnaise sauce and a side of shrimp. The food was

to look at him but if he thought I didn’t see his quick and frequent

there n*ked. How

2

our meal and as we walked up to the room he placed his hand on my back and I moved away from him at

once.

walk away from me like that. In a moment that was pure and happy and intimate‘ and you

1

to be anywhere near him. I changed into my pajamas and

I know

to hear it,” I crawled into bed rolling over and turning

barked. Stomping over and turning the light in again. “I know it was. I wanted. I’m

control myself,”

gathered that you were sorry it happened,” I sat up and looked him in the eyes, crossing my arms over my

with me.” I am trying to be respectful I don’t want to make you

is that’s stopping you but if you can’t do something don’t start something. You have no idea how I felt after you left. I’m sorry that this is so hard for you but until you can recognize it’s hard for me

1

heard me yelling so she accepted me with a hug

probably wasn’t easy to see your leaders argue when they had just found each other but she was mindful and stayed quiet only

up and ate together, Grayson keeping

enough time had

have him. I know it’s a hard task but if you give him time I know he will realize what a fool

2

us and she cared about him. Grayson evoked strong loyalty out of everyone I had met so far

the cars were now jeeps. The road to his pack was over