I lay in bed the full weekend. My phone was off and I made sure Carter didn't let anyone in. I didn't want to face them.

I didn't want to face him.

It was Sunday evening and I had moved from my bed to the couch. Stuffing my face with pizza and hot Cheetos, binge watching the vampire diaries. "You have to face him at some point bear".

"No I don't".

"Bear-...".

"I need you to be on my side right now Carter. I don't want to talk to him".

"I'm always on your side Leah but he's not going to go away".

"Don't care". I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my head. Never once did I look away from the TV. Jake was the last thing on my mind. "Hear him out".

"Absolutely not". I glared. "I don't care what he has to say". I couldn't speak to him even if I wanted to. I was too angry. Friday night still fresh on my mind. That girls hands on him.

The way he was caressing her body.

It made me sick.

"You don't have to stay with me". I shoved a slice of pizza in my mouth. "I'm sure you've got things to do".

"And leave you here in this state?". He shook his head. "This isn't you Leah".

"Yes it is".

"You're being ridiculous. Look how badly he's got to you. You haven't showered in days, your makeup is smudged all over your face and-...".

"Maybe I just can't be bothered okay. Maybe I don't want to shower or clean myself up. Maybe I just want to lay here and be sad. Have you ever thought about that?". I bit back my tears.

don't like seeing you like

I wiped my eyes

fucked it hasn't

"You think?".

sorry bear. You

to him. I had planned my life around him and for what?". I leaned over grabbing my laptop. Maybe I still had time to send my application form. "For him to embarrass me. How am I to gain

no one is talking to

little bitches will be trying to snake their way in". I wasn't upset anymore, the angry cursing through my body at the thought of

going

up my laptop bringing up

the only one that will suffer when you do. You're meant

get over someone

Carter glared. "Don't fucking talk like

didn't have a scanner to send it to my laptop so

you think before you make

As long as I kept avoiding him I would be fine. I wouldn't let him get inside my head.

hope you know what you're getting getting yourself into. He

he has no one

say I

"I won't".

going out for a

"I'll be fine".

.....

I showered.

cried, my eyes red and

angry and then I cried some

off I wrapped the towel around my body.

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