I lay in bed the full weekend. My phone was off and I made sure Carter didn't let anyone in. I didn't want to face them.

I didn't want to face him.

It was Sunday evening and I had moved from my bed to the couch. Stuffing my face with pizza and hot Cheetos, binge watching the vampire diaries. "You have to face him at some point bear".

"No I don't".

"Bear-...".

"I need you to be on my side right now Carter. I don't want to talk to him".

"I'm always on your side Leah but he's not going to go away".

"Don't care". I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my head. Never once did I look away from the TV. Jake was the last thing on my mind. "Hear him out".

"Absolutely not". I glared. "I don't care what he has to say". I couldn't speak to him even if I wanted to. I was too angry. Friday night still fresh on my mind. That girls hands on him.

The way he was caressing her body.

It made me sick.

"You don't have to stay with me". I shoved a slice of pizza in my mouth. "I'm sure you've got things to do".

"And leave you here in this state?". He shook his head. "This isn't you Leah".

"Yes it is".

"You're being ridiculous. Look how badly he's got to you. You haven't showered in days, your makeup is smudged all over your face and-...".

"Maybe I just can't be bothered okay. Maybe I don't want to shower or clean myself up. Maybe I just want to lay here and be sad. Have you ever thought about that?". I bit back my tears.

like seeing you like

that". I wiped my eyes pushing the pizza box

really fucked it hasn't

"You think?".

bear. You don't deserve

ready to give myself to him. I had planned my life around him and for what?". I leaned over grabbing my laptop. Maybe I still had time to

one is

bitches will be trying to snake their way in". I wasn't upset anymore, the angry cursing through my

you're going

I opened up my laptop bringing up google

suffer when you do. You're meant to be together, the

to get over someone

glared. "Don't fucking

application online. I didn't have a scanner to send it to my laptop so

asking is that you

need to think". As long as I kept avoiding him I would be fine. I wouldn't let him get inside my head.

what you're getting getting yourself into.

has no one to blame

say I didn't warn

"I won't".

a bit. Will you

"I'll be fine".

.....

I showered.

eyes red and

then

wrapped the towel around my body. I sulked for

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