Chapter 73

***Chastity***

The following month flew by. I hadn’t been able to go home at all during that month. Rowen, Jax, and Colby hadn’t been able to come to spend a weekend either. Rowen, and Jax had been too busy with alliance talks with Rogue Leader Dean to be able to take a weekend away. Molly, Melissa, and Gina were able to spend one weekend with us though. That had been a lot of fun.

School was going well, and I was doing better than I thought I would. I was really proud of myself for how well I was doing. I was also really enjoying my drawing class. We had finally moved into drawing shapes, and starting to learn techniques for blending shapes into larger pictures. I could also feel myself getting stronger physically from self defense class. I did notice that my movements, and the way I carried myself was changing with more focus on my core than trying to keep myself as unnoticeable as possible.

My appointments with Dee-Dee were going well too. I still had hard days, and she was right there to work through them with me. She was working hard with me on changing my thought process on how I viewed those of higher rank than myself. I could see it was working just by how much more comfortable I became during my meetings with Luna Clair. As often as she could Luna Clair would come to my room for our lessons. She loved being around Lilac, and watching her antics.

Lilac was doing fantastic, and had grown a bit. She definitely wouldn’t be a big cat, but she was still adorable. She also finally found comfort in being on her leash, and harness. She still preferred to ride on my shoulder instead of walking any where, but she would walk when I shifted into Leila, and we took her outside to play. I had gotten a longer leash for those times so they could play together. Lilac’s favorite. thing about Leila seemed to be her tail. She loved to chase, and pounce on it. Leila’s favorite thing about Lilac was that she was cute, and cuddly. Once their play was done, they would cuddle, and sunbath for a bit. Leila did seem a bit more sad than usual lately though. Lilac picked up on that, and was always trying to cheer Leila up, or snuggle and clean her. Leila wasn’t telling me what was wrong though.

I was packing up Friday after class, to go home for the weekend. It was the weekend of Melissa, and Ross’s ceremony. Marcus was driving. Norm, Lexi, and I, as Melissa, and Ross had invited Marcus and Norm. Of course Norm was excited about it. Not only would he get to see my pack, but he would also get to see his sister for the first time since his ceremony. I noticed Leila was perking up as well.

“You seem awfully happy today.” I said to Leila.

“Of course I am. I’m going to see mate soon.” Leila responded happily.

“You mean we are going to see Rowen?”

“Right of course.”

“Will you tell me why you’ve been so sad lately?”

“I miss mate. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to feel guilty for keeping us away.”

“That’s why you didn’t say anything?”

“Yes. I know us being here is right for you, and it’s helping you, but it’s hard some times.”

“I’m sorry Leila. I didn’t realize how hard this would be for you.”

“No. No. Chastity, don’t feel guilty. You’re doing the right thing. The best thing for you. I want you to be happy, healthy, and whole. This is doing what it was supposed to do, and I’m glad for that. I just wish we could figure out a way to see mate more is all.”

“Rowen, and I were talking about that. Now that the alliance with the rogues is set, he should have more

free time to come visit. He’s going to try to get here more often.”

“Can we go to him sometimes? I miss brothers, and dad too.”

“We can try, but it’s hard because I don’t drive.”

“Well second brother will be here soon for school. Maybe he can drive us.”

“I’m sure we can talk to him about it.”

“Please.”

“Ok. I will.”

I cut the conversation when I heard a knock at my door. I opened it to see Marcus, and Norm standing there, each with a suitcase. I laughed at the size of Norm’s. It looked like he had packed for a month away instead of two days.

“I told him he didn’t need that much, but you know how he is.” Marcus chuckled.

“I want to be prepared for any situation. Plus I have our gift for Melissa, and Ross in my bag.” Norm sniffed, and I giggled.

“Ready to go?” Marcus asked.

“Yup. I just need to grab my phone charger, and we’re all set.” I responded as I picked up the small duffle bag Rowen leant me for my trip back after my week home.

“You’re not bringing Lilac?” Norm asked.

“I hadn’t planned on it. I’ll only be gone for two days.” I responded, looking at my kitten stretched out on

her window seat.

I had debated taking her home with me, but decided not to. She would be fine for two days without me. She had plenty of food, water, and toys. She was used to being alone all day because of me being in class.

“I wouldn’t leave her Chastity. You never know when you might need her.” Norm said quietly.

“True, but I’ll have Rowen if needed.” I admitted, looking at Lilac.

“I know, but maybe she’ll need you. Maybe she doesn’t want to be left alone for two days.”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine.”

“Who will be fine? What are we talking about?” Lexi ask as she came to my door, small suitcase being pulled behind her.

“Chastity was going to leave Lilac here for the weekend.” Norm answered.

“Nope. You can’t leave the baby here by herself all weekend. I don’t think you realize this Chastity, but she’s gotten used to your schedule. When you’re not back at a certain time she sticks her little paws out from under the door, trying to find you. If I’m near your door I can hear her squeaking for you.” Lexi explained, and I pinched my brows.

I hadn’t known that. Now I felt bad. There had been a few times when I went to the library to find a book after dinner instead of coming back here. I didn’t realize Lilac reacted badly to my leaving her alone longer than usual.

“Baby needs to come home with us.” Leila said to me.

ok for two days.”

with us. She is ours to take care of, and we’re hers too. She

“Ok. Ok.”

be getting in kind

way to Jax’s apartment. Lexi moved to the guest room in

came out in

like that it makes me want to pounce on you.”

like when

bed. He stretched out on his side, facing me, and propping

sweet girl.” Rowen

you too.” I

last month of not seeing

“Yeah. It has.”

before you leave this weekend. I don’t want to

think that’s a good

that on Sunday

“Ok.”

come here.” Rowen growled

confusion. I was right here. I squealed when he put his arm around my waist, and pulled me close and partially under him. He

growled

squirmed a bit at the feeling. Rowen growled again then kissed up my neck, along my jaw then to my lips. I opened to him immediately, and we explored each others mouths with our tongues. He pressed his chest to mine as we continued to kiss, my

growled, and I

“Is…did….what’s wrong?” I whispered.

Everything, you are perfect. It makes me want to touch

to claim you. It’s just a struggle some times,

“Oh. I….I’m sorry.”

to be sorry for. You have done nothing wrong. I made you a promise, and I am going

be honest I don’t even understand the things I am feeling

to you, but I think that would make the

“What struggle?”

the sheet off his lap. I looked down at the

because

“Um….yeah.”

“I….sorry.”

should NEVER be sorry for turning me on. I’m just sorry I can’t control it

“Umm…..does….does that hurt?”

No. Not yet at

“I…..I don’t understand.”

to explain it to you only because I don’t want

“Oh….um…Ok?”

I heard the shower turn on, and the shower door close. After a minute or two I heard Rowen groan, and my eyes widened wondering what he was doing in there, hoping

well as his.

courage I wasn’t sure I had. I was just drifting off to sleep when Rowen came out of the bathroom back in his pajama pants, and his hair wet. He climbed into bed behind me,

feel better now?” I

my shoulder, pulling me tight

“….I’m glad.”

“Good night sweet girl.”

“Good night Rowen.”

kissed my shoulder a few times

morning to get a start on breakfast. Melissa, Ross, Marcus, and Norm were meeting us in Jax’s apartment. Once we all ate, Melissa, Molly, Lexi, and I were going to Ross’s apartment to get ready. Melissa decided not to have us standing with her, and Ross for her

to wear to be a part of the ceremony in some way. After we all ate, the four of us girls left, and headed over

this time. It was a soft pink, and I could tell Lexi loved it by the smile on her face. Melissa, like Molly arranged for us to have a spa day with the same ladies who came for Molly’s. I was laying on the

you girls

course. You can ask us anything Chastity.”

my words. I didn’t

help in any

what….um…..about sex, or how our bodies react to

Molly said then giggled

something happen between you and Rowen?” Melissa

my body feels when he kisses me,

when he kisses you?”

and it gets wet. It’s kind of weird. Is

wrong with you. That’s your body’s way of saying it wants to be touched. That it enjoys his kisses, and wants more of it. The

Why would my body react that

that is still healing from what happened to you. The part that controls your body’s responses to stimulation will always react that way to his touch.” Melissa

about him?” I

do you

pants had poked out, a lot I guess.” I whispered, and the girls all

hard on.” Molly said

Why? Why would

snickered.

are innocent.” Melissa said with a

“S..sorry.” I stuttered.

be sorry. There is nothing wrong with

for sex a little. Ok a lot differently than ours

“How?” I asked.

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