***Chastity***

Getting up the next morning was a struggle. I had not slept great, and my emotions were running really high still. I was surprised to find Colby, and Lexi still in my room. Colby was already out of bed, reading something. Lexi was still sound asleep. How the three of us managed to fit in my bed together was beyond me.

“Oh good. You’re awake.” Colby said quietly as he set his book down.

“What are you two still doing here?” I whispered as I sat up.

“No way we were leaving you alone last night with how upset you were.”

“But….”

“You’re my sister short stack, and you needed me.”

“I….you two shouldn’t have to do that though.”

“It’s not about having to. We did it because we love you, and you needed us.”

“Oh.”

I didn’t know what else to say. I felt horrible for ruining their night. They shouldn’t have to put their lives on hold for me like that. Last night was terrible, if I’m being honest. It didn’t start out that way. I had fallen asleep while studying, but the dream that woke me up was awful. It wasn’t like my old nightmares, but it was emotionally terrible.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Colby asked.

“I…I have to get to class.” I responded, looking at my hands.

“Don’t be mad, but I already contacted your professor this morning. Since you have nothing due, they emailed today’s notes, so you have nothing until your appointment with Dee-Dee.”

“Why did you do that?”

“Because we need to talk about what happened last night, you need more rest, and how would you be able to concentrate when you head, and emotions are a mess?”

“But I can’t afford to miss class.”

“Chastity, it’s one class, and it’s not going to set you back. Your professor already sent your notes, and assignments to you so you’ll have no trouble.”

“But….”

“I get it. I really do, but right this second you need focus on you.”

“I…Thank you.”

“I’m your brother. I know I didn’t do it for years, but it’s my job to look out for you. You were a mess last night. You even said you wanted to drop out.”

“I…I’m sorry I worried you.”

“I’m fine. You’re not alone anymore Chas. You have people who love you, and are always here for you.”

“How….how did you know I was having a rough time last night?”

“Rowen text me and Lex.”

“Oh. How did you get in?”

“I had your door code add to my ID card?”

I didn’t know how I felt about that. It seemed a little much to me.

7 did it because I needed to make sure I could get to you if you needed me.” Colby explained before I could ask

“We did it because we love you small fry. Nothing more, nothing less.” Lexi said sleepily as she sat up, and rubbed her eyes.

I nodded, and looked at my hands. I wasn’t used to people being there for me when I’m struggling. I didn’t know how to react to it. It made me feel weird. Before I could say anything Lexi moved over to me, and put her arm around me, pulling me close to her.

“Do you want to tell us what happened last night? Maybe we can help you feel better.” Lexi offered.

“It’s stupid. It was just a dream.” I whispered.

“Nothing that upsets you that much is stupid Chas.” Colby said as he picked up Lilac, and set her on the bed near me.

I watched my kitten come over to me, and climb onto my shoulder then said, “She needs to be fed.”

“I already fed her.” Colby stated.

“You did?” I questioned.

“Yeah. She was trying to wake you up so I fed her to let you sleep.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Talk to us Chas. We want to help you.”

“It was just a dream. I don’t even know why it upset me so much.”

“It doesn’t matter why. All that matters is that it did, and we want to help you feel better.” Lexi coaxed.

I took Lilac off my shoulder, pulled away frim Lexi, and leaned forward. I ran my hands through my hair, and sighed I didn’t want to talk about it because I didn’t want to think about it. It was my biggest fear brought to life. I felt Lexi rub my back, and Colby sat on the bed in front of me. He put his fingers under my chin, and made me look up at him.

“Chastity, we’re not going to laugh at you, ridicule you, or make you feel bad in any way about your dream. We want to hear about it so we can help you work through the stuff that it caused.” Colby said gently and I finally nodded

“Joe, and dad decided to drop the charges against Fiona then had her released from prison. They even brought her back to the pack, and moved her into dad’s apartment with him and Braxton. I went home for a visit, not knowing any of that. When I got home dad, Joe, Jax, Molly, Peter, Ross, Melissa, Gina, and Braxton started yelling at me about being a liar That they didn’t appreciate all of the lies I told about Fiona that caused them to falsely imprison her. You two, Rowen, Norm, and Marcus turned on me right that second

“Dad and Joe told me that I wasn’t allowed to return to school because of my lies. Rowen told me he

wasn’t going to reject me, but he didn’t want me as his Luna any more. He was going to take Fiona as his Luna. That I was banished from the pack, and that he made sure I wouldn’t be accepted by another pack, ever, not even the Rogue leader would except me. I would spend the rest of my life alone. That eventually even Leila would abandon me because she would no longer be able to have a mate, pack, or pups. That was my punishment for hurting so many people with my lies, and games. I was allowed to pack up some clothes in my back pack, take Lilac, and leave. I was not allowed to take any money, my phone, nothing. worth money. Even the ring from my mom was taken from me, and given to Fiona. Joe lead me to the edge of the pack territory, broke my link to the pack, and then the warriors chased me out of the pack.” I explained quietly as I had tears running down my face.

Hell, we all saw Fiona, Aurora, Naomi, and Gina beating you up at the Welcome Home party. Your scars are evidence to what you were subjected to as well. Fiona will serve her full sentence, and she has already been banned from the pack. That is not going to change. I know you may not believe my words, but I can get the paperwork for Fiona from Joe if you want me to. The only other thing we can do is continue to prove to you that we are not going any where. The only way you’re not going to finish school is if you decide to

In my heart I do,

understand, and we’re not judging you in any way. Please don’t think we are. We’ll never leave you You’re my sister-in-law, and my best friend.

stuck with all of us. I know we all let you down for a lot of years, but that

I’m trying. I really worried Rowen last

sure you were

probably

would probably be a

us to stay?” Lexi

You both have classes

won’t be in class this morning.” Lexi

to mine, but I’ll be here before dinner.” Colby stated

“Oh.” I said quietly.

I go get changed then grab us breakfast while you call Rowen, and take a shower. We’ll spend the

Thank you.” I agreed as I went to go get clothes to

clear my mind. I couldn’t think straight still. That dream really messed up my head. I hadn’t expected that, and

several text messages from Rowen, Jax, Molly, Ross, and Melissa. Just seeing those messages made me smile, and feel a little bit better. With a sigh, I

just thinking about you. How are you feeling this morning?” Rowen’s deep voice came through the phone making me

I worried you last night.”

have nothing to be sorry for. You had a bad night, that happens.

and you did what you could to make sure I was taken care of

the one holding

didn’t get mad at me for yelling at you. I was being unreasonable for no reason, and wouldn’t listen to what you were saying. I was making assumptions over nothing with no evidence behind my

I understand, and I don’t hold it against you. I know these things happen, and I didn’t explain

didn’t do anything wrong

did you. You have a right to your

more reasonable about them, and actually talked to you about them, instead of

I was more worried about you than bothered by your yelling. If you need to yell, you’re more than welcome

you be ok with

“Because I love you.”

“…”

don’t expect you to say it back sweet girl. I know you’re still dealing with a lot right now, and

“I….thank you.”

Do…do you want to tell

about my dream. He listened to all I had to say, quietly. When I was finished I realized I was crying, again. I hated that a dream had such an effect

happen that may have caused you to have a

thinking about her a bit lately. Just wondering how she is doing in prison, and if she has started therapy yet. In some ways I feel kind of bad for her because she’s in that place all by herself. She’s completely alone, and I know how that feels. It’s hard in so many ways. Maybe that’s what caused that dream. Everyone turned their backs on her, and now she has no one.” I responded after thinking about it

this point. That, and her lack

feels to

you though, so I know

me that wants to let her know that someone would be there for her. but that person shouldn’t

understandable. You should never put yourself in a position that makes you uncomfortable unless

same time I

but I’m thinking not right now. I don’t think it

to Dee-Dee about all of this, and see

“That’s a good idea.”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

being so supportive,

do it with honor. You

better go. Lexi just got here

talk to you

“Ok.”

up as I opened the door for Lexi. We ate breakfast together quietly. She worked on some homework as I wrote a long journal entry. I needed to get everything out that I was thinking, and feeling. I had just finished my

“Umm…Chas?” Lexi said tentatively.

“Yeah?” I responded.

about

to give up. I just felt so alone last night, and….Well I thought

completely alone. We’re all here for you. We’re

and that means

need to get to class, and you need

“Yeah.”

you at self defense

“Yes.”

my journal, I made my way to Dee-Dee’s office. Surprisingly I wasn’t worried about what she would think of my journal entries, and what I was feeling. I knew she would help

few days. I knew at least one was about Greg’s passing, and my worries about Braxton. The most important

I had nothing to worry about, but it

it meant a lot to him

a part of me that was afraid of Braxton, especially when he’s angry. Seeing first hand how he handles his anger, put the last of those fears

were able to do that. That is a big step

massive steps

have an impact on one’s emotional, and mental stability. Especially when one struggles as you do. It’s also not unheard of to have our subconscious to dredge

do I

first, remind yourself that it was just a dream, not reality. Just because we

“That’s true.”

yourself often that it was just a dream. Reality is what you have been living the last few months. Reality is the experiences you have had over the last few months. Reality is the

yes, but maybe not in the way you’re

“What do you mean?”

Fiona without interacting with her in any

“How?”

your life any longer. She never will be again. Even when she gets out she’s not allowed back at your pack. She will have to find herself a new pack. She also is not allowed here at Cloverland, for any reason. You have to remind yourself that none of the people in your life have any contact with her. You wrote in here

about that fact that there is a part of me that is worried about her, and feeling bad

feel those things. There is nothing wrong with that,

“Why is that?”

ask

“Sure.”

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