***Chastity***

Getting up the next morning was a struggle. I had not slept great, and my emotions were running really high still. I was surprised to find Colby, and Lexi still in my room. Colby was already out of bed, reading something. Lexi was still sound asleep. How the three of us managed to fit in my bed together was beyond me.

“Oh good. You’re awake.” Colby said quietly as he set his book down.

“What are you two still doing here?” I whispered as I sat up.

“No way we were leaving you alone last night with how upset you were.”

“But….”

“You’re my sister short stack, and you needed me.”

“I….you two shouldn’t have to do that though.”

“It’s not about having to. We did it because we love you, and you needed us.”

“Oh.”

I didn’t know what else to say. I felt horrible for ruining their night. They shouldn’t have to put their lives on hold for me like that. Last night was terrible, if I’m being honest. It didn’t start out that way. I had fallen asleep while studying, but the dream that woke me up was awful. It wasn’t like my old nightmares, but it was emotionally terrible.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Colby asked.

“I…I have to get to class.” I responded, looking at my hands.

“Don’t be mad, but I already contacted your professor this morning. Since you have nothing due, they emailed today’s notes, so you have nothing until your appointment with Dee-Dee.”

“Why did you do that?”

“Because we need to talk about what happened last night, you need more rest, and how would you be able to concentrate when you head, and emotions are a mess?”

“But I can’t afford to miss class.”

“Chastity, it’s one class, and it’s not going to set you back. Your professor already sent your notes, and assignments to you so you’ll have no trouble.”

“But….”

“I get it. I really do, but right this second you need focus on you.”

“I…Thank you.”

“I’m your brother. I know I didn’t do it for years, but it’s my job to look out for you. You were a mess last night. You even said you wanted to drop out.”

“I…I’m sorry I worried you.”

“I’m fine. You’re not alone anymore Chas. You have people who love you, and are always here for you.”

“How….how did you know I was having a rough time last night?”

“Rowen text me and Lex.”

“Oh. How did you get in?”

“I had your door code add to my ID card?”

I didn’t know how I felt about that. It seemed a little much to me.

7 did it because I needed to make sure I could get to you if you needed me.” Colby explained before I could ask

“We did it because we love you small fry. Nothing more, nothing less.” Lexi said sleepily as she sat up, and rubbed her eyes.

I nodded, and looked at my hands. I wasn’t used to people being there for me when I’m struggling. I didn’t know how to react to it. It made me feel weird. Before I could say anything Lexi moved over to me, and put her arm around me, pulling me close to her.

“Do you want to tell us what happened last night? Maybe we can help you feel better.” Lexi offered.

“It’s stupid. It was just a dream.” I whispered.

“Nothing that upsets you that much is stupid Chas.” Colby said as he picked up Lilac, and set her on the bed near me.

I watched my kitten come over to me, and climb onto my shoulder then said, “She needs to be fed.”

“I already fed her.” Colby stated.

“You did?” I questioned.

“Yeah. She was trying to wake you up so I fed her to let you sleep.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Talk to us Chas. We want to help you.”

“It was just a dream. I don’t even know why it upset me so much.”

“It doesn’t matter why. All that matters is that it did, and we want to help you feel better.” Lexi coaxed.

I took Lilac off my shoulder, pulled away frim Lexi, and leaned forward. I ran my hands through my hair, and sighed I didn’t want to talk about it because I didn’t want to think about it. It was my biggest fear brought to life. I felt Lexi rub my back, and Colby sat on the bed in front of me. He put his fingers under my chin, and made me look up at him.

“Chastity, we’re not going to laugh at you, ridicule you, or make you feel bad in any way about your dream. We want to hear about it so we can help you work through the stuff that it caused.” Colby said gently and I finally nodded

“Joe, and dad decided to drop the charges against Fiona then had her released from prison. They even brought her back to the pack, and moved her into dad’s apartment with him and Braxton. I went home for a visit, not knowing any of that. When I got home dad, Joe, Jax, Molly, Peter, Ross, Melissa, Gina, and Braxton started yelling at me about being a liar That they didn’t appreciate all of the lies I told about Fiona that caused them to falsely imprison her. You two, Rowen, Norm, and Marcus turned on me right that second

“Dad and Joe told me that I wasn’t allowed to return to school because of my lies. Rowen told me he

wasn’t going to reject me, but he didn’t want me as his Luna any more. He was going to take Fiona as his Luna. That I was banished from the pack, and that he made sure I wouldn’t be accepted by another pack, ever, not even the Rogue leader would except me. I would spend the rest of my life alone. That eventually even Leila would abandon me because she would no longer be able to have a mate, pack, or pups. That was my punishment for hurting so many people with my lies, and games. I was allowed to pack up some clothes in my back pack, take Lilac, and leave. I was not allowed to take any money, my phone, nothing. worth money. Even the ring from my mom was taken from me, and given to Fiona. Joe lead me to the edge of the pack territory, broke my link to the pack, and then the warriors chased me out of the pack.” I explained quietly as I had tears running down my face.

anything that happened to you. They admitted to all of it. We also have your medical records from your hospital stays. Hell, we all saw Fiona, Aurora, Naomi, and Gina beating you up at the Welcome Home party. Your scars are evidence to what you were subjected to as well. Fiona will serve her full sentence, and she has already been banned from the pack. That is not going to change. I know you may not believe my words, but I can get the paperwork for Fiona from Joe if you want me to. The only other thing we can do is continue to prove

know. In my heart I do, but sometimes it’s

in any way. Please don’t think we are. We’ll never leave you You’re my sister-in-law, and my best friend. Like it or not, you’re stuck with me for life.” Lexi said as she bumped against my

let you down for a lot of years, but that will never be the case again. Give us time to prove

know, and I’m trying. I really worried

stayed on video chat until he was sure you were

should probably call

be a

us

both have classes

I won’t

here before dinner.”

“Oh.” I said quietly.

call Rowen,

you.” I agreed as I went to go get clothes to change

calm down, and clear my mind. I couldn’t think straight still. That dream really messed up my head. I hadn’t expected that, and I really had no idea what brought on such a dream. I didn’t like it. It felt like

dressed then grabbed my phone off my nightstand. I found I had several text messages from Rowen, Jax, Molly, Ross, and Melissa. Just seeing those messages made me smile, and feel

thinking about you. How are you feeling this morning?”

I’m sorry I worried you

a bad night,

sure I was taken care of it when I needed it most. That meant a lot to me.

have been the one holding you

also didn’t get mad at me for yelling at you. I was being unreasonable

I don’t hold it against you. I know these things happen, and I didn’t explain things to you well from

do anything

right to your concerns, and

should have been more reasonable about them, and actually talked to you about them,

worried about you than bothered by

be ok with what

“Because I love you.”

“…”

to say it back sweet girl. I know you’re still dealing with a lot right now, and I would.

“I….thank you.”

you want

say, quietly. When I was finished I realized I was crying, again. I hated that a dream had such an effect on me. I was going to have to ask Dee -Dee about why a dream was having such

Did something happen that may have caused you to have a dream about her?”

has started therapy yet. In some ways I feel kind of bad for her because she’s in that place all by herself. She’s completely alone, and I know how that feels. It’s hard in so many ways. Maybe that’s what caused that dream. Everyone turned

true, but her actions have put her where she is at this point. That, and her lack of remorse for what she did. She almost killed you Chas. That’s not some

get it. I do, but I know how it feels to be isolated from everyone, and completely alone. It’s tough, and

that feels like. I know you though, so I

her know that someone would be there for her. but that

in a position that makes you uncomfortable unless there is no other

I need

right now. I don’t think it would do either of you any

talk to Dee-Dee about all of this, and see what

“That’s a good idea.”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

being so supportive,

You don’t ever have

go. Lexi just got here with

I’ll talk to you tonight.

“Ok.”

up as I opened the door for Lexi. We ate breakfast together quietly. She worked on some homework as I wrote a long journal entry. I needed to get everything out that I was thinking, and feeling. I had just finished my entry when Lexi looked up at

“Umm…Chas?” Lexi said tentatively.

“Yeah?” I responded.

about dropping

I just felt so alone last night, and….Well I thought if I went

know you’re never really completely alone. We’re

and that means

I need to get to class, and you need to get to

“Yeah.”

you at

“Yes.”

journal, I made my way to Dee-Dee’s office. Surprisingly I wasn’t worried about what she would think of my journal entries, and what I was feeling. I knew she would help me with this, as she always did. I was really glad my dad got me in with her. I felt like I had come a long way. I knew I had a long way to go, but she really helped a lot over the last

journal entries from the last few days. I knew at least one was about Greg’s passing, and my worries about Braxton.

about, but it isn’t always to convince your mind of

it meant a lot to him to have you there.” Dee-Dee said with a

There was still a part of me that was afraid of Braxton, especially when he’s angry. Seeing first hand how

glad that you were able to do that. That is a big step in

took massive

not uncommon for dreams to have an impact on one’s emotional, and mental stability. Especially when one struggles as you do. It’s also not unheard of to have our subconscious to dredge

what do I

just a dream, not reality. Just because we dream

“That’s true.”

yourself often that it was just a dream. Reality is what you have been living the last few months. Reality is the experiences you have had over the last few months.

but maybe not in the way you’re

“What do you mean?”

face your fear of Fiona without interacting with her in any way. Especially not

“How?”

have to find herself a new pack. She also is not allowed here at Cloverland, for any reason. You have to remind yourself that none of the people in your life have any contact with her. You wrote in here that Colby offered to get her file from your pack so you can see things for yourself. I think it would be a good idea for you to have that. You can read it anytime

about that fact that there is a part of me that is

you that will feel those things. There is nothing wrong with that, but

“Why is that?”

me ask you a

“Sure.”

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