The Alpha Who Saved Me

CHAPTER 79

I keep putting off going to see Jasper, and both Gavin and Declan keep telling me that it's okay if I want to wait until after I have the baby, so I don't put any more stress on myself. That's not why I keep putting it off, though. I'm scared to see his face, and I don't want to admit that to anybody. Every time I get it in my head that today is the day, a spine-chilling feeling creeps in and I can't shake it. It's silly, I know he can't get to me, but I think it's more of the memories flooding back.

I was strong while taking all the abuse, I didn't want him to see that he was breaking me. I would go lay down by Tala, mentally, every time he used my body. It was the only way I could get passed it and show him that everything he was doing to me wasn't affecting me like he thought it would. Since leaving that place, I have been able to put it all behind me in order to get through the day. Aside for the intimacy, it's been working just fine.

If I go and see him, I'm worried that the wall I've built around that specific part of my life will all come tumbling down. My wolf thinks I should let it come down because only then can I start to rebuild after I take care of the cause of it all. I just don't want to seem weak to anybody.

'I'll be with you, Quinn. I will always be right here to fight every obstacle that comes our way. We are a team, you and I, and we will always persevere through it all.' My wolf is wise, but she was asleep through almost all of it. Tala was there the last couple of times that he used me, so she knows how I handled it at the time.

She would cuddle me when I laid by her those few times, and I wish she could have done it through it all.

Dividing into pages now

'I'm scared, Tala.'

'I know...'

'What if all the memories come flooding back?'

'Then I will be with you and will relive all of it alongside you. We are becoming stronger day by day, and so is our pup.

'The guys think I should wait. What do you think I should do?'

'I think the sooner, the better. You don't need to shift in order to get your revenge. Besides, revenge will be sweeter if you do it all on your own. I will be there, of course, and will lend a paw or two if need be. Your hands can still shift to my claws without injuring our pup. A nice paw through the chest cavity may be in order by the end, or you can just let the fucker bleed out.'

'Wow, Tala, I never knew you could be so sinister.' I gasp playfully.

to protect those that I love. I will gnaw on his intestines, let his wolf heal him just enough for me to be able to do it all over again. I will commit sodomy

the fuck, Tala?'

you torture a fucker

line of making him drink wolfbane, and then let

works too, I guess.'

brought up learning how to torture and sodomize others.'

into pages

was? I was just thinking an eye for an eye.' My wolf

states.

Tala, and maybe my thought

but for now, I just

have I ever told you that I hate it when you're right?' She swishes her tail and turns her head to snub me.

to Gavin when he gets back, and maybe he will have some suggestions. Then, maybe I can put on my big

much easier.'

think that; you perv!'

comes flying down the road and spits dust as he stops in front of the pack house. I'm sitting out on the front porch with Summer as she teaches me to crochet but my attention is turned towards

went well with his

go put this stuff away and I will see you at supper time." Summer informs me as she tries to get away before

I stand up and wobble towards the steps.

"You don't have to get up,

sitting in that chair

upstairs to my office, and we can discuss whatever it is that has you looking like you're going to kill someone."

and fall. I would fight him in the beginning, but it

case.