“You’re holding up better than I thought,” Bart says, leaning against my bedroom’s door frame.

I sit on my bed, feeling a bit numb.

I had changed into my nightgown after going up to my room, while all the others either went to theirs, or decided to go and hunt. Apparently, Richard’s order was for them all to reside here, but they are free to move around London City. I think Rebecca, Anna, Grace and Cecily went to party downtown, while the others decided to hunt on their own or ruminate in their rooms. I can hear Lancelot a floor below, probably on the phone with vampires on the other side of the Atlantic. I lie down in the middle of my bed. There’s no way I’ll be able to sleep though. My vampire heart is back to beating slowly, but if it was still a human one, I can tell it would be going crazy from everything that unfolded. I feel like everything that was said within the last couple of hours is just some crazy movie of somebody else’s life…Daily Latest update www.noveljar.com

“…It doesn’t feel real,” I mutter. “All of this. It’s as if I just… dreamt the two last days, and I’m going to wake up in that cold hotel room by myself.”

“Well, sorry to disappoint you, Baby Vamp, but that just won’t happen.”

“I think I’m… hiding. Hiding behind a thin, thin wall before it all crashes down and the truth comes to hit me.”

He closes the door and slowly walks over, taking a seat at the end of my bed, fingers interlaced on his lap.

“…Is it hard to believe?”

“It’s insane,” I scoff.

“You said you never loved that guy. But you loved your ex. So why do I feel like I’m missing the bigger picture there?”

“…Something happened,” I mutter, unable to look him in the eye. “Rick and I had to… go our separate ways. We belonged to different worlds, and it became… harder and harder to just stick together. I made some mistakes… Things I did and I couldn’t undo. …And Charles was there for me. It’s as simple as that.”

“Sounds like a lot of regrets.”Daily Latest update www.noveljar.com

“You have no idea.”

Every single glance back on my life, I see regrets. Every time, someone I didn’t hold back, something I didn’t say, somewhere I didn’t go. Perhaps Bart was right. Perhaps this whole new life is so easy to accept for me because I’m afraid, scared to look back on June Starr’s pathetic life and for reality to hit me like a meteorite crash. I hate being questioned, because I can’t even bear to question myself. I picked every bad road and the deeper I got into the woods, the harder it was to admit I wanted to run back.

“Why do you think Richard is so focused on looking into my death?” I whisper.

Bart frowns faintly, visibly deeply pondering as well. He glances at the door, and slowly shakes his head.

“It’s hard to know what an Overlord thinks, Baby. My guess is, there’s got to be something bigger around your death that Richard wants to look into. First, I’m curious as to why he bothered to go to New Amsterdam for you.”

“You mean New York City.”Daily Latest update www.noveljar.com

“Whatever. Richard never goes overseas, Hera. Never. The last time I ever saw him go anywhere was France, and that was in the eighteenth century. Overlords don’t typically leave their territories, it’s just… too dangerous. They usually stick to their own while all of us pray it stays that way. Vampire wars are ugly. Grace, Lance and the others have friends in every country, and we’re free to go around, but Overlords stick to their own territories, and I’m pretty sure some of them still use good old-fashioned letters to stay in touch.”

something like I was Richard’s… first vampire in

us and wait to see what the humans were doing for a while. Some

“Then, why…?” I mutter.

did this and why, we might get more clues. To be honest, I think you should mind your own

had kind of

I suddenly blurt out.Daily

my throat, and that heavy feeling in my heart.

said is true, that means I’ve been… manipulated until I killed myself. How much of a blind, deluded idiot could I have been to do

the

and I had to move into a cold, big house with complete strangers who couldn’t bring me the smallest comfort. After that, I lost my only best friend, and I lost the one man I ever loved. I even… I even lost my cat! I lost… every single person who mattered to me. Every time I had a chance at happiness, it vanished. I thought I’d never get better, but I had Charles. Charles was always there, and I had been holding on to that, thinking perhaps I’d work something out, that maybe we’d be okay, until it wasn’t

stage of grief,

he for real?

look,” he chuckles. “That’s just how it is. They’re not… a hundred percent

“Fuck you.”

“You wish.”

amused at all. Bart

being your

another glare. He’s annoyingly good at reading me already. I look away, but he hit the nail right on the head. I stare at the dark sky outside the window. I still get my heart doing crazy jumps whenever

me down on the

to bed before you think too much, Baby

think I can sleep,” I groan, feeling like

what do you want

I shake my head.

we play

raises

at me all evening. Plus, I never really got to play video games in my previous life…”Daily Latest

a bit surprised by my request, but he still goes to grab a couple of consoles, and we lay down side by side on my bed, while

too much, it’s too big. I keep replaying all the memories of Charles and I. He always said he loved me, but no matter what, I couldn’t force my heart to shift in that direction. I re-analyze every moment we had together, trying to find the cracks, the little things I should perhaps have picked up on. Perhaps that was my own delusion. Perhaps I was so desperate for a chance at a stable, good enough life, that I refused to see all the little things that didn’t make sense. How patient he was. How caring he

had no phone, nothing left behind to entertain me, as he thought that would only upset me if I got access to the media. I had horrible headaches, dizziness, and felt hungry yet couldn’t eat. Charles had recommended I stay inside, to ignore the bad press, but there were always gossip magazines left around. I couldn’t go out without telling him… At the time, he always reassured me those were for the better, for me. Then, how come there was absolutely nothing that made me feel better, in all this time? I had asked him to go to Montana, but the house was being renovated, it was a no. I wanted to go back to California,

furiously smashing the console’s buttons. Bart gives me a glance. I don’t see that stupid monster on the screen, I see all the times Charles smiled to my face and told me it was going to be okay. All the times I heard “It’s for your own good. It’s

“Baby.”

and waits. It’s like all my anger, my pain and my rage are finally surging, in big

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