Chapter 42

“What, is your subconscious homophobic?” I ask, continuing to be frustrated and a little annoyed at him for not believing me even though I’m telling him the truth and spilling a serious secret for his own good.

Because honestly! I could make out with him here! And I would be the only one who knew that it was real!

I’m doing this for him, to be fair, and yet he persists in not believing me! It’s very rude.

“It might be,” Luca says with a shrug, still looking down at me. “I wouldn’t think that it was, but here you are, still not kissing me, even though I keep trying. Honestly, Ari, being shut down by the figment of my own imagination is very annoying –”

“I’m real!” I insist again, this time through my teeth.

“Prove it,” he says, shrugging.

“Ask me anything!”

“That won’t work,” he says, turning his head to the side. “Anything you say is something I already know or think I know. No way to verify that it’s true.

“Fine,” I say, crossing my arms and lifting my chin. “Ask me something tomorrow, in real life – something impossible, that you’d never predict. I’ll give you the same answer here as I do then.”

Luca turns his head a little, considering. “That could work,” he murmurs, but then he turns back to me with a sly smile. “But in the meantime, you and I could, you know, fool around a little…”

In the distance, my wolf howls with delight.

“Whoa,” Luca says, turning to look for her. “What was that?”

“It was my wolf,” I sigh.

“Really?” he asks, and then the turns back to me, smirking. “Your wolf does…not sound adverse to the idea.” He leans more fully against the tree now, bringing his body closer to mine and kind of pinning me back against the trunk in a way that…

12:49 Sun, 10 Mar

Chapter 42

That I do not mind at all.

“Luca,” I sigh, and honestly I have to close my eyes as I turn my face away from him, because if I spend even a moment longer looking up at the shadows his long lashes cast against his cheeks…I am definitely going to do something I regret.

“What?” he asks softly, cupping my cheek in his palm and turning my face back to his, his hand and his voice both impossibly gentle. “What do you want, Ari?”

And his question…I know instinctually that there are layers to it. That he’s asking me what I want, but also what I like –

I want to be kissed.

him

want him to pull me tight against him as he presses his mouth hard to

weight deliciously against me, pinning me back against the tree in a way that feels….god, it feels fucking amazing, his body pressed flush against mine. “I want you to ask me

“Not that kind of question,” I growl, and he

whispers, playing my game even as he strokes his thumb along the skin of my cheek. “Real–Ari had my nan’s coffee cake

ice cream,” I answer immediately, “with whipped cream.”

fair to be in this dream state with him and be the only one knowing what’s going on. If we’re

very

going to know

on top?” Luca asks, teasing – because, I mean, it is a very girly desert. “Of course sprinkles,” I murmur, sighing as I take one last look of him,

more than seems practical.” I take a deep breath, savoring his scent and the press of his muscled torso against me for one last second. I hesitate, but then I lift my hands, and let my palms press against his sides, feeling the lines of his obliques as I slowly slide my hands down

moment, I let myself imagine what his

passes

damn it, Ari,” he

and press my eyes shut, and will

clench my teeth with a groan, turning and burying my face into

myself vehemently for

god damn it, god damn it I wanted to

hell knows when I’ll have the chance – because Luca, he just wanted to kiss the figment of his imagination that looks like me so he can figure out how he’s feeling. As soon as he realizes that that figment is

screaming from the

curling up in my pillows and wrapping myself up in my soft white duvet, considering it. Because Luca – he still thinks

and that I’m just unfairly confusing him because I’m his mate underneath this boy

complications of this, because Ben revealed today how tenuous my secret already is. And as much as I’m fine with Ben knowing… Luca? My mate? It’s a different story – an unpredictable

hiding my gender at this school, because failing to

Chapter 12

hold of the thing I never knew I always wanted: a chance at the

all ready to give

even for the chance to make

turning over again in my blankets, and I close my eyes and force myself to try and go back to sleep – a state which feels very, very far away

kind of Alpha alarm clock that I was not

‘em, little cousin!” Jesse shouts, throwing a pillow into the open curtain of

I growl, pulling the blankets over myself and

if they want breakfast, they don’t,” Rafe says, laughing and yanking my away, making me

duvet

the dumbwaiter?” I ask, sitting up finally when I

bathroom, brushing as he strides around the room in his underwear, getting ready for the day.

he takes Jesse’s place in the bathroom. I sigh and grab it, yawning so wide my jaw cracks. As I pull my boot on I hope that there’s

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