Chapter 42
“What, is your subconscious homophobic?” I ask, continuing to be frustrated and a little annoyed at him for not believing me even though I’m telling him the truth and spilling a serious secret for his own good.
Because honestly! I could make out with him here! And I would be the only one who knew that it was real!
I’m doing this for him, to be fair, and yet he persists in not believing me! It’s very rude.
“It might be,” Luca says with a shrug, still looking down at me. “I wouldn’t think that it was, but here you are, still not kissing me, even though I keep trying. Honestly, Ari, being shut down by the figment of my own imagination is very annoying –”
“I’m real!” I insist again, this time through my teeth.
“Prove it,” he says, shrugging.
“Ask me anything!”
“That won’t work,” he says, turning his head to the side. “Anything you say is something I already know or think I know. No way to verify that it’s true.
“Fine,” I say, crossing my arms and lifting my chin. “Ask me something tomorrow, in real life – something impossible, that you’d never predict. I’ll give you the same answer here as I do then.”
Luca turns his head a little, considering. “That could work,” he murmurs, but then he turns back to me with a sly smile. “But in the meantime, you and I could, you know, fool around a little…”
In the distance, my wolf howls with delight.
“Whoa,” Luca says, turning to look for her. “What was that?”
“It was my wolf,” I sigh.
“Really?” he asks, and then the turns back to me, smirking. “Your wolf does…not sound adverse to the idea.” He leans more fully against the tree now, bringing his body closer to mine and kind of pinning me back against the trunk in a way that…
12:49 Sun, 10 Mar
Chapter 42
That I do not mind at all.
“Luca,” I sigh, and honestly I have to close my eyes as I turn my face away from him, because if I spend even a moment longer looking up at the shadows his long lashes cast against his cheeks…I am definitely going to do something I regret.
“What?” he asks softly, cupping my cheek in his palm and turning my face back to his, his hand and his voice both impossibly gentle. “What do you want, Ari?”
And his question…I know instinctually that there are layers to it. That he’s asking me what I want, but also what I like –
I want to
I want him to put
me tight against him as he presses his mouth
he rests his weight deliciously against me, pinning me back against the tree in a way that feels….god, it feels
my eyes fly open, already glaring. “Not that kind of question,” I
strokes his thumb along the skin of my cheek. “Real–Ari had my nan’s coffee
cream,” I answer immediately,
– because I stand by what I decided last time. It is not fair to be in this dream state with him and be the only one knowing what’s going on. If we’re going to do this?
very clearly want
to know
it is a very girly desert. “Of course sprinkles,” I murmur, sighing as I take one last
way more than seems practical.” I take a deep breath, savoring his scent and the press of his muscled torso against me for one last second. I hesitate, but then I lift my hands, and
for a moment, I let myself imagine what his
shudder passes through
Ari,” he growls, leaning in
my eyes shut, and will
clench my teeth with a groan,
in my pillow, feeling sorry for myself, cursing myself vehemently for having a sense of ethics and the willpower to stop Luca from
damn it, god damn it
hell knows when I’ll have the chance – because Luca, he just wanted to kiss the figment of his imagination that looks like me so he can figure out how he’s feeling. As soon as he realizes that that figment is
run screaming
I think he will. I sigh, curling up in my pillows and wrapping myself up in my soft white duvet, considering it. Because Luca – he still thinks I’m a boy, and as much as he’s willing to subconsciously consider experimenting with
he is straight, and that I’m just unfairly confusing him because I’m his mate underneath this boy
sigh, worrying about all of the complications of this, because Ben revealed today how tenuous my secret already is. And as much as I’m fine with Ben knowing… Luca? My mate? It’s a different story – an unpredictable level of exposure that I’m just not ready for yet.
still hiding my gender at this school, because
Chapter 12
just gotten hold of the thing I never knew I always wanted: a
at all ready to give
chance to make
myself to try and go back to sleep – a state which feels very,
Rafe wake up early, some kind of Alpha alarm clock that I was not born
shouts, throwing a pillow into the open curtain of my nook. I jump and shrick when it
of sleep,” I growl, pulling the blankets over myself and
they don’t,” Rafe says, laughing and yanking my away, making me shriek
duvet
sitting up finally when I realize they’re not going to leave
Jesse says around his toothbrush as he walks out of the bathroom, brushing as he strides around the room
say, yawning and looking around for my boots. Rafe tosses one in my direction as he takes Jesse’s place in the bathroom. I sigh and grab it, yawning so wide my jaw cracks. As I pull my boot on
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