Chapter 0370

He shrugs, stopping there, perhaps sensing that I don't want all the details. Or wanting to keep them for himself. But I don't begrudge him that.

I frown a little, though, at this phrasing. "So..." I say carefully, softly. "Did you not..."

*If you're asking if I wanted to," he murmurs, lifting his eyes to mine. "I did. That wasn't...the problem."

"Was there a problem?"

"No," he replies, earnest. "I mean, I liked it. I liked it a lot. We did it again, a couple more times after that day. They sent us out into the woods more often, and we'd collect wood, and sometimes she'd be there and sometimes she wouldn't. But when she was there, I was thrilled - and she was happy too, I could tell. We got closer, enjoyed each other's company, liked..." he sighs, and shakes his head a little like he doesn't know how to explain it. "We liked the physical stuff too I know we did."

"That's good, though," I murmur, reaching out a hand and lightly tracing my fingers through his hair. "Isn't it?"

I just gathered wood, and brought it back, and she wasn't there anymore. I never heard from her again, never...I mean, I

now. Because...what the hell is going on in his world, that his girl was able to find him for a season and then disappear? Was she some kind of magical fae? Some figment of

carefully and we're both quiet for a long couple

guidance. Because, on one hand, that sounds like....well, kind of like a perfectly lovely and acceptable way to lose your virginity. Two young people meeting in the woods, attracted to each other, not really knowing what they're doing and it

somehow, I know that it's

nice girl and I'm grateful to her for being so kind to me. Like, you can't understand what it was like - we didn't even know we were unhappy in the barracks, not really, because...we didn't have anything to compare it to. But those handful of hours, stolen with Tasha in the woods..." he looks up at me now,

so many layers to this - a depth of complication and emotion that

hand?" I murmur, continuing to run my fingers through his

a little in anger. "Is that...

getting, and he

the distance. "But I had done...stuff. To myself... you know. When I was

to stroke my fingers through his hair, because it is weird

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