#Chapter 83 – Ethan’s Confession

How did it come to this? I think morosely. How did everything go so wrong so quickly?

I’d like to think I’ve been shielding the pups from the truth about what happened between Jane and I all those years ago for their own safety and peace of mind, but if I’m honest, I think I’ve been protecting myself. I know how horribly I messed up with Jane, and as badly as it hurt to see my former mate looking at me with that expression of utter betrayal, seeing it on the faces of my innocent pups is worse. When I left the house this morning I was their hero,

now I’m their villain.

“Why don’t you come sit down.” I suggest to the pups, hoping they’ll agree. How am I ever going to explain this to them? They’re too young to even understand a fraction of it.

Despite my tormented thoughts, they obey. One by one they toddle into the living room,

settling on the sofa while I take a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of them. I search their young faces for any hint of

openness, but they all seem completely

closed off.

“Listen.” I begin, not even knowing where I’m going with this. “I made a lot of

mistakes in the past, and I did a lot of things

I’m not proud of, but I love you and I love

your Mommy more than anything.”

The quadruplets exchange meaningful glances, “what does that mean?” Ryder

questions.

“It means that it’s true. Eve tricked me into

believing something terrible about Mommy,

and… I punished her.” I confess, “I put her

on house arrest.”

“But how could you b’lieve Eve?” Riley

demands, clearly affronted on her mother’s

behalf.

“Because I didn’t know how evil she was

then.” I explain, “I don’t have any other

excuse. I was a fool – I let her make a fool of

me, and believing her is the biggest regret of

my life, second only to how I treated your Mommy afterwards.”

“Wha’s house arrest?” Parker inquired,

clearly distracted by my previous choice of

words.

“It’s like what Paisley said, a permanent

time out.” I share.

“So you made Mommy a prisner,” Riley

summarizes, “for something she didn’ do.’

“Yes.” I concede. “That’s right. I made her

and I’ll never regret

more.”

their affection for me

them.

I did to Jane, I’d probably

can’t believe how quickly things have flipped upside down. A little while ago I was happier than I’ve been in

now I’m awash with shame, guilt, and despair. I’m losing them.

fault. A little voice

head, after all, if you hadn’t

wouldn’t be able

was young and stupid. I argue

understand the blurry black

of

them I’m the evil man that hurt their

you find out?” I ask them,

why this suddenly came up after

both

us.” Parker admits,

just kicked a

To my horror, Riley,

actually flinch away from

I felt ashamed before, it’s nothing compared to how terrible

caution,

((

I was just surprised.”

murmurs, looking as though the sky is falling around

the other man. “People aren’t angels or demons. Good people do bad things sometimes, and bad people do

are you?” Ryder asks

at me.

doing something terrible, but I

I can tell you is that I’m not the same man I was then.” I

understand.

They don’t.

possible?” Riley demands, “you

get older, sometimes you can change so much over the years that you don’t even recognize

understand.” Ryder

think he’s saying he has

in a

humorlessly, “I don’t have

just… I would never

I can’t change the fact that I did it in the past.

})

before, but you’re not

now?” Parker presses.

was bad before.” I confirm, “And I’d like to think I’m not anymore, but that’s

he could do it ‘gain.” Ryder contributes, gazing at me with newfound

already in trouble’ gain. Was dis your fault too?” She asks

everything I can to

mother.” I insist.

what’d you think?” Parker

whimpers, “I love Daddy,

‘I love Mommy.”

reminds her, “He

})

Ryder put their heads together, murmuring to each other under their breath. Cocking

voices, I catch the

“I think we should leave.” Riley is saying.

much nicer to

agrees.

was right, Mommy’s scared.”

want her to be scared.

we should leave.”

two murmur, pulling away and looking

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