#Chapter 83 – Ethan’s Confession

How did it come to this? I think morosely. How did everything go so wrong so quickly?

I’d like to think I’ve been shielding the pups from the truth about what happened between Jane and I all those years ago for their own safety and peace of mind, but if I’m honest, I think I’ve been protecting myself. I know how horribly I messed up with Jane, and as badly as it hurt to see my former mate looking at me with that expression of utter betrayal, seeing it on the faces of my innocent pups is worse. When I left the house this morning I was their hero,

now I’m their villain.

“Why don’t you come sit down.” I suggest to the pups, hoping they’ll agree. How am I ever going to explain this to them? They’re too young to even understand a fraction of it.

Despite my tormented thoughts, they obey. One by one they toddle into the living room,

settling on the sofa while I take a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of them. I search their young faces for any hint of

openness, but they all seem completely

closed off.

“Listen.” I begin, not even knowing where I’m going with this. “I made a lot of

mistakes in the past, and I did a lot of things

I’m not proud of, but I love you and I love

your Mommy more than anything.”

The quadruplets exchange meaningful glances, “what does that mean?” Ryder

questions.

“It means that it’s true. Eve tricked me into

believing something terrible about Mommy,

and… I punished her.” I confess, “I put her

on house arrest.”

“But how could you b’lieve Eve?” Riley

demands, clearly affronted on her mother’s

behalf.

“Because I didn’t know how evil she was

then.” I explain, “I don’t have any other

excuse. I was a fool – I let her make a fool of

me, and believing her is the biggest regret of

my life, second only to how I treated your Mommy afterwards.”

“Wha’s house arrest?” Parker inquired,

clearly distracted by my previous choice of

words.

“It’s like what Paisley said, a permanent

time out.” I share.

“So you made Mommy a prisner,” Riley

summarizes, “for something she didn’ do.’

“Yes.” I concede. “That’s right. I made her

prisoner, and I’ll never

more.”

affection for me

don’t blame them. If someone did to

did to

them. Still, I can’t believe how quickly things have flipped upside down. A little while ago I was happier than I’ve

long time, and now I’m awash with shame, guilt, and despair. I’m losing them. I think forlornly, I only just got them,

fault. A

head, after all,

they wouldn’t be able to hold it against you.

young and stupid. I argue

the blurry

white shades of

and redemption. To them I’m the evil man that hurt their mother,

did you find out?” I

why this suddenly came

were both out

us.” Parker admits,

if I’ve just kicked a puppy.

To

actually

I thought I felt ashamed before, it’s nothing compared to how terrible I feel

caution, softening

((

was just surprised.”

monster.” Paisley murmurs, looking as though

man. “People aren’t angels or demons. Good people do

you?”

at me.

tricked into doing something terrible, but I don’t know if your Mommy

can tell you is that I’m not the same

understand.

They don’t.

possible?” Riley demands, “you weren’t

me.” I state, dragging one large hand through my hair, “but people change as time passes. You’ll see when you get older, sometimes you can change so much over the years that you don’t even recognize the person you used to be,

understand.”

saying

in

I chuckle humorlessly, “I don’t have

personalities. I just… I would never

can’t change the fact that I did it

})

before, but

now?” Parker

like to think I’m not anymore, but that’s not for me to decide. It’s for you

could do it ‘gain.” Ryder contributes, gazing at me with newfound

trouble’ gain. Was

doing everything I

mother.” I insist.

what’d you think?” Parker

She whimpers, “I

‘I love Mommy.”

Mommy.” Riley reminds her, “He locked her

})

Parker and Ryder put their heads together, murmuring to each

voices, I catch

of their conversation. “I think we should leave.” Riley is saying.

nicer to Mommy.”

agrees.

was right, Mommy’s

her to be

we should leave.”

other two murmur, pulling away and looking curiously towards Paisley.

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