#Chapter 83 – Ethan’s Confession

How did it come to this? I think morosely. How did everything go so wrong so quickly?

I’d like to think I’ve been shielding the pups from the truth about what happened between Jane and I all those years ago for their own safety and peace of mind, but if I’m honest, I think I’ve been protecting myself. I know how horribly I messed up with Jane, and as badly as it hurt to see my former mate looking at me with that expression of utter betrayal, seeing it on the faces of my innocent pups is worse. When I left the house this morning I was their hero,

now I’m their villain.

“Why don’t you come sit down.” I suggest to the pups, hoping they’ll agree. How am I ever going to explain this to them? They’re too young to even understand a fraction of it.

Despite my tormented thoughts, they obey. One by one they toddle into the living room,

settling on the sofa while I take a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of them. I search their young faces for any hint of

openness, but they all seem completely

closed off.

“Listen.” I begin, not even knowing where I’m going with this. “I made a lot of

mistakes in the past, and I did a lot of things

I’m not proud of, but I love you and I love

your Mommy more than anything.”

The quadruplets exchange meaningful glances, “what does that mean?” Ryder

questions.

“It means that it’s true. Eve tricked me into

believing something terrible about Mommy,

and… I punished her.” I confess, “I put her

on house arrest.”

“But how could you b’lieve Eve?” Riley

demands, clearly affronted on her mother’s

behalf.

“Because I didn’t know how evil she was

then.” I explain, “I don’t have any other

excuse. I was a fool – I let her make a fool of

me, and believing her is the biggest regret of

my life, second only to how I treated your Mommy afterwards.”

“Wha’s house arrest?” Parker inquired,

clearly distracted by my previous choice of

words.

“It’s like what Paisley said, a permanent

time out.” I share.

“So you made Mommy a prisner,” Riley

summarizes, “for something she didn’ do.’

“Yes.” I concede. “That’s right. I made her

and I’ll

more.”

their affection for

blame them. If someone did to

I did

flipped upside down. A

awash with shame, guilt, and despair. I’m losing them. I think forlornly, I only just got

A little

after all, if you hadn’t

Jane they wouldn’t be able to hold it against

young and stupid.

understand the blurry

shades of youthful indiscretions,

and redemption. To them I’m the evil man that hurt their

out?” I ask

suddenly came up

both out all

us.” Parker admits,

just kicked

To my horror,

Ryder actually flinch

if frightened I’ll lash out at them. If I thought I

I caution,

((

was just surprised.”

you were a monster.” Paisley murmurs, looking as though

man. “People aren’t angels or demons. Good people do bad

you?” Ryder asks

over at me.

was tricked into doing something terrible, but I

is that I’m not the same man I was

understand.

They don’t.

that possible?” Riley demands,

can change so much over the years that you don’t even recognize the person you used to be, and having children is one of those things

don’ understand.” Ryder

think he’s saying he has two

in a stage

chuckle humorlessly, “I don’t

I just… I would

change the fact that I

})

were bad before, but

Parker presses.

not anymore, but that’s not for me to decide. It’s

bad thing once, he could do it ‘gain.” Ryder contributes, gazing at me with newfound suspicion.

in trouble’ gain. Was dis your fault too?” She asks

doing everything I

mother.” I insist.

what’d you think?”

“I love Daddy,

‘I love Mommy.”

Daddy hurt Mommy.” Riley reminds her,

})

Ryder put their heads together, murmuring to each other under

voices, I catch the tail

conversation. “I think we should leave.”

much nicer to Mommy.” Ryder

agrees.

was right, Mommy’s scared.”

her to be

we should leave.”

murmur, pulling away and looking curiously

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