The Luna and her Quadruplet Pups by Jane Above Story

#Chapter 83 – Ethan’s Confession

How did it come to this? I think morosely. How did everything go so wrong so quickly?

I’d like to think I’ve been shielding the pups from the truth about what happened between Jane and I all those years ago for their own safety and peace of mind, but if I’m honest, I think I’ve been protecting myself. I know how horribly I messed up with Jane, and as badly as it hurt to see my former mate looking at me with that expression of utter betrayal, seeing it on the faces of my innocent pups is worse. When I left the house this morning I was their hero,

now I’m their villain.

“Why don’t you come sit down.” I suggest to the pups, hoping they’ll agree. How am I ever going to explain this to them? They’re too young to even understand a fraction of it.

Despite my tormented thoughts, they obey. One by one they toddle into the living room,

settling on the sofa while I take a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of them. I search their young faces for any hint of

openness, but they all seem completely

closed off.

“Listen.” I begin, not even knowing where I’m going with this. “I made a lot of

mistakes in the past, and I did a lot of things

I’m not proud of, but I love you and I love

your Mommy more than anything.”

The quadruplets exchange meaningful glances, “what does that mean?” Ryder

questions.

“It means that it’s true. Eve tricked me into

believing something terrible about Mommy,

and… I punished her.” I confess, “I put her

on house arrest.”

“But how could you b’lieve Eve?” Riley

demands, clearly affronted on her mother’s

behalf.

“Because I didn’t know how evil she was

then.” I explain, “I don’t have any other

excuse. I was a fool – I let her make a fool of

me, and believing her is the biggest regret of

my life, second only to how I treated your Mommy afterwards.”

“Wha’s house arrest?” Parker inquired,

clearly distracted by my previous choice of

words.

“It’s like what Paisley said, a permanent

time out.” I share.

“So you made Mommy a prisner,” Riley

summarizes, “for something she didn’ do.’

“Yes.” I concede. “That’s right. I made her

I’ll never

more.”

affection for

blame them. If someone did to

what I did

believe how quickly things have flipped upside down. A little while

long time, and now I’m awash with shame, guilt, and despair. I’m losing them. I think forlornly, I only just got them, and

fault. A little voice says in

back of my head, after all, if

so cruel to Jane they wouldn’t be able to hold it

and stupid. I argue back, but

don’t understand the blurry

shades of

complexities of growth and redemption. To them I’m the evil

did you find out?” I ask

why this suddenly came up after

both out all day.

us.” Parker admits, looking

just

growl. To

Ryder actually flinch away from

I thought I felt ashamed before, it’s nothing compared to how terrible I feel now.

I caution,

((

I was

monster.” Paisley murmurs, looking as though the sky is falling around

I sigh, feeling a rush of pure hatred for the other man. “People aren’t angels or

you?” Ryder asks grumpily,

at

like to think I’m a good man who was tricked into doing something terrible, but I

is that I’m not the same man I was then.” I proclaim, praying

understand.

They don’t.

that possible?” Riley demands, “you weren’t you then?”

my hair, “but people change as time passes. You’ll see when you get older, sometimes you can change so much over the years that you don’t even recognize the person you used to be, and having children is one

understand.” Ryder

he’s saying he has two

explains in a

humorlessly, “I don’t have

just… I would never treat

I can’t change the

})

you were bad before, but you’re not

now?” Parker presses.

to think I’m not anymore, but

he did the bad thing once, he could do it ‘gain.” Ryder contributes, gazing at me

in trouble’ gain. Was dis your fault too?”

doing everything I can to help your

mother.” I insist.

what’d you think?”

“I love

‘I love Mommy.”

Riley reminds her, “He

})

Ryder put their heads together, murmuring to

towards their low voices, I catch the

think we should leave.” Riley is saying. 1

much nicer to Mommy.” Ryder

agrees.

Mommy’s scared.”

“I don’ want her to be scared.

we should leave.”

pulling away and looking curiously towards