#Chapter 83 – Ethan’s Confession

How did it come to this? I think morosely. How did everything go so wrong so quickly?

I’d like to think I’ve been shielding the pups from the truth about what happened between Jane and I all those years ago for their own safety and peace of mind, but if I’m honest, I think I’ve been protecting myself. I know how horribly I messed up with Jane, and as badly as it hurt to see my former mate looking at me with that expression of utter betrayal, seeing it on the faces of my innocent pups is worse. When I left the house this morning I was their hero,

now I’m their villain.

“Why don’t you come sit down.” I suggest to the pups, hoping they’ll agree. How am I ever going to explain this to them? They’re too young to even understand a fraction of it.

Despite my tormented thoughts, they obey. One by one they toddle into the living room,

settling on the sofa while I take a seat on the edge of the coffee table in front of them. I search their young faces for any hint of

openness, but they all seem completely

closed off.

“Listen.” I begin, not even knowing where I’m going with this. “I made a lot of

mistakes in the past, and I did a lot of things

I’m not proud of, but I love you and I love

your Mommy more than anything.”

The quadruplets exchange meaningful glances, “what does that mean?” Ryder

questions.

“It means that it’s true. Eve tricked me into

believing something terrible about Mommy,

and… I punished her.” I confess, “I put her

on house arrest.”

“But how could you b’lieve Eve?” Riley

demands, clearly affronted on her mother’s

behalf.

“Because I didn’t know how evil she was

then.” I explain, “I don’t have any other

excuse. I was a fool – I let her make a fool of

me, and believing her is the biggest regret of

my life, second only to how I treated your Mommy afterwards.”

“Wha’s house arrest?” Parker inquired,

clearly distracted by my previous choice of

words.

“It’s like what Paisley said, a permanent

time out.” I share.

“So you made Mommy a prisner,” Riley

summarizes, “for something she didn’ do.’

“Yes.” I concede. “That’s right. I made her

prisoner, and I’ll

more.”

affection for me evaporating,

I don’t blame them. If someone did

mother what I did to Jane,

down. A little while ago I was happier than

now I’m awash with shame, guilt, and despair. I’m losing them. I think forlornly, I only just got them, and I’m already losing

own fault. A little

of my head, after

so cruel to Jane they wouldn’t be able to

stupid. I argue back,

understand the blurry

of youthful indiscretions,

growth and redemption. To them I’m the evil man that hurt their

did you find out?” I ask

this suddenly

and I were both out

told us.” Parker admits,

I’ve just kicked a puppy.

To my horror, Riley,

actually flinch away

thought I felt

caution, softening my tone,

((

sorry. I was

murmurs, looking

rush of pure hatred for the other man. “People aren’t angels or demons. Good people do bad things sometimes, and

are you?” Ryder asks grumpily,

at me.

doing something terrible, but I don’t

tell you is that I’m not the same man I was then.” I

understand.

They don’t.

Riley demands,

as time passes. You’ll see when you get older, sometimes you can change so much over the years that you don’t

don’ understand.”

saying he has two

in

I chuckle humorlessly,

just… I would never treat

that way today, but I can’t change the fact

})

were bad before,

now?” Parker presses.

I confirm, “And I’d like to think I’m not anymore, but that’s

did the bad thing once, he could do it ‘gain.”

Was dis your

I can to help

mother.” I insist.

you think?”

whimpers, “I love

‘I love Mommy.”

Riley reminds

})

and Ryder put their heads together, murmuring to each other under their breath. Cocking

low voices, I catch the

of their conversation. “I think we should leave.” Riley is

nicer to Mommy.”

agrees.

Mommy’s scared.” Parker

want her to

we should leave.”

other two murmur, pulling away and looking

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