The Luna and her Quadruplet Pups by Jane Above Story

Jane

Watching Ethan drive away with Paisley just about destroyed me. When she answered my question, informing us all that she did indeed want to stay with her father, I tried to hide how badly it hurt me. I think I did an admirable job covering my emotions, until of course Parker, Ryder and Riley threw a collective fit. We’d only just gotten them calmed down when Ethan announced it was time to go, and then Paisley was sobbing and clinging to me and the other pups. It seems that however certain she felt about her decision, actually saying goodbye was another matter entirely.

Finally Ethan scooped her up and carried her away, apparently deciding that if he waited until we were all done crying – they would never be able to leave. So I watched my youngest, precious daughter disappear into the distance, until Ethan’s car finally passed over the horizon and vanished from sight. Getting my remaining pups back into the car to complete our own journey had been easy after that, and their dramatic protests had drained energy so well that they quickly fell asleep.

“What do I do now?” I ask Devon, glancing into the back seat of the car to ensure the other pups are still out cold.

“You put one foot in front of the other.” He answers, reaching over to squeeze my hand. “And you keep doing that until you no longer have to think about it. One day soon you’ll be running at top speed, and this will all be a bad memory.”

“I did that once before” I remind him. “But in my experience bad memories don’t always stay in the past.”

“That’s true.” He acknowledges, glancing at me meaningfully, at the small hand still cradled in his.

“But things that were negative at one time of your life can be positive in another. And if you live in constant fear of your past then you’ll always be a slave to it. You don’t want to live that way, Jane.

And you don’t want that for your pups either.”

“Can I ask you something?” I press, my curiosity about the years we spent apart growing.

“Of course.” He agrees easily.

picture what it had been like for him. Granted, I left too, but I’d never been able to move on because

move on from my old life, or move on from you?” Devon clarifies, watching me out of

reply, trying not to feel too guilty. I still can’t believe he left because of

on from my old life was difficult, but I took it one day at a time, and eventually enough time passed and I found enough happiness in my new pack that I stopped missing my old life. I think I’ll always be nostalgic for the nightfang pack, but I left when I was so young that I didn’t

a slave to your past?”

advice,

I laugh, dragging my fingers through my

gradually replaced by snow banks and evergreens, and I wonder if I’m doomed to be like Devon. I can leave the NightFang pack behind, I can come to terms with being away from Paisley, but can I ever get over Ethan? Can I ever truly move on, or am I doomed to pine for him for the rest of my life? Is

for thinking this way, for letting a man steal her strength and break her spirit. I think of my daughters too, of the example I want to set for them not as a woman who falls down and is too afraid to get back up again, but as a woman who is stronger for her Scars, and has

pain control me for too long, I’ve let Ethan twist and contort me into someone I don’t recognize.. and I’m not going to

me, a look of

for a while – it doesn’t mean they’re going to stay that way. Nothing lasts forever. You have to work for the life you want, every single day. And I don’t know how to do that yet, I don’t know

if he not only understands what I mean, but

children are thrilled to see our familiar apartment. They tear through the front door, immediately letting Mr. Fluff out of his travel carrier and giving him a tour of his new home. That’s one detail that slipped my mind when we said goodbye to Paisley, I didn’t even consider the bunny until they were long gone. I have to call Ethan about getting Paisley another pet. I wonder if it’s even occurred to her yet that choosing Ethan meant leaving the

here as full and bright as they were before Ethan came along and ruined everything again. I deposit a huge pile of mail on the table recalling the

it open and extract the papers within, expecting some dull notifications about policy changes

I exclaim,

Devon inquires

fifteen years left on the

important to me to have money in the bank in case of emergencies, than to throw millions of dollars at an