The Luna and her Quadruplet Pups by Jane Above Story

Jane

Watching Ethan drive away with Paisley just about destroyed me. When she answered my question, informing us all that she did indeed want to stay with her father, I tried to hide how badly it hurt me. I think I did an admirable job covering my emotions, until of course Parker, Ryder and Riley threw a collective fit. We’d only just gotten them calmed down when Ethan announced it was time to go, and then Paisley was sobbing and clinging to me and the other pups. It seems that however certain she felt about her decision, actually saying goodbye was another matter entirely.

Finally Ethan scooped her up and carried her away, apparently deciding that if he waited until we were all done crying – they would never be able to leave. So I watched my youngest, precious daughter disappear into the distance, until Ethan’s car finally passed over the horizon and vanished from sight. Getting my remaining pups back into the car to complete our own journey had been easy after that, and their dramatic protests had drained energy so well that they quickly fell asleep.

“What do I do now?” I ask Devon, glancing into the back seat of the car to ensure the other pups are still out cold.

“You put one foot in front of the other.” He answers, reaching over to squeeze my hand. “And you keep doing that until you no longer have to think about it. One day soon you’ll be running at top speed, and this will all be a bad memory.”

“I did that once before” I remind him. “But in my experience bad memories don’t always stay in the past.”

“That’s true.” He acknowledges, glancing at me meaningfully, at the small hand still cradled in his.

“But things that were negative at one time of your life can be positive in another. And if you live in constant fear of your past then you’ll always be a slave to it. You don’t want to live that way, Jane.

And you don’t want that for your pups either.”

“Can I ask you something?” I press, my curiosity about the years we spent apart growing.

“Of course.” He agrees easily.

for him. Granted, I left too, but I’d never been able to move on because of

on from you?” Devon clarifies, watching me out of the corner of his eye

to feel too guilty. I still can’t

old life. I think I’ll always be nostalgic for the nightfang pack, but I left when I was so young that I didn’t really figure out who I was until later. You on the other hand… I’m not sure I ever actually

all that stuff you were saying about not being a slave to

because I can’t take my own advice,

enough.” I laugh, dragging my

and more bleak the further north we travel. Dead grass and barren trees are gradually replaced by snow banks and evergreens, and I wonder if I’m doomed to be like Devon. I can leave the NightFang pack behind, I can come to terms with being away from Paisley, but can I ever get over Ethan? Can I ever truly move on, or am I doomed to pine for him for the rest of my life? Is he the last man I’ll ever love, the last man who will ever touch me? Is the r0mantic part of my

bravery to marry him. She would be ashamed of me for thinking this way, for letting a man steal her strength and break her spirit. I think of my daughters too, of the example I

too long, I’ve let Ethan twist and contort me into someone I don’t recognize.. and I’m not going to do it anymore. I want to find a

a look of pride filling his eyes. “I’ve been

just because things are good for a while, or bad for a while – it doesn’t mean they’re going to stay that way. Nothing lasts forever. You have to work for the life you want, every single day. And I don’t know how to do that yet, I don’t know where to

understands what I mean, but feels it too. “Then I’ll

instead of tantrums and tears, my children are thrilled to see our familiar apartment. They tear through the front door, immediately letting Mr. Fluff out of his travel carrier and giving him a tour of his new home. That’s one detail that slipped my mind when we said goodbye to Paisley, I didn’t even consider the bunny until they were long gone. I have to call Ethan about getting Paisley another pet. I

happy, I can make our lives here as full and bright as they were before Ethan came along and ruined everything again. I deposit a huge pile of mail on the table recalling the exasperated look our doorman gave me when we entered the building. He’d shoved the stack into my hands before I had a chance to look at

slice it open and extract the papers within, expecting some dull notifications about policy changes or account maintenance. Instead,

I exclaim, scanning

Devon inquires coming to

in full.” I share, showing him the documents. “It has to be a mistake, I had fifteen

secure enough to take such a risk. It was more important to me to have money in the bank in case of emergencies, than to throw millions of dollars at an