Jane

When I wake, my first thought is of my baby.

I jerk up in bed, clutching my belly. What happened? I think frantically. I try to take stock of my body. I certainly don’t feel like I’ve just given birth. As if my baby can sense my anxiety, a little kick taps the wall of my uterus. “Oh, thank the Goddess.”I breathe, patting the spot. “Hello angel.”

“Jane, you’re awake!” I hadn’t even realized Devon was in the room with me until he spoke.

“Devon!” I exclaim, “What happened?”

“The doctor said it was pre-term labor, but they were able to stop it.” Devon explains, and when he doesn’t say anymore, I suspect that’s all he knows.

It’s not surprising, given what I’ve learned about how strict doctors can be with patient confidentiality.

The words ‘pre-term labor’ send a stab of fear through my body. I’m only five months along, that’s too soon for this baby to be born. “Stop it for how long?” l inquire, even realizing my friend probably doesn’t know.

Thankfully a doctor swoops in at precisely that moment, a chart in hand. “Hello Jane, how are you feeling?”

“Okay,” I answer uncertainly. “Is my baby going to be okay?”

“Yes,” He smiles, “we think your cervix was injured when you delivered your quads, this happens sometimes with babies following multiples. But don’t worry, we’re going to put a stitch in your c3rvix to make sure it’s nice and strong, and we’ll give you a gel to apply daily, plus some progesterone shots. We’re going to do everything possible to keep this pup inside you until at least 37 weeks.”

“Will I have to be on bedrest until then?” I inquire nervously, immediately thinking of my plans to go after Ethan.

“No, once you’re released you can go back to your usual routine, but we are going to keep you here under observation for a while, just to be safe.” The physician explains.

“What, for how long?” I counter, trying to remember if Nina told me precisely how soon Ethan would be having his surgery.

The doctor laughs, “Don’t worry, Jane. It will only be a couple of days, and then you’ll be free to go.”

I insist. “Can’t

expression. “Jane, whatever else is going on in your life, it can wait. This baby isn’t ready to be born yet. If you were to deliver now, it would have less than a forty percent chance of survival, and even then it would probably have life-long problems. We need to get you to at least 24 weeks to

even that had been a challenge, especially with Paisley’s heart condition. Three preemies was difficult, a fourth almost dying

day is

Janey. First

of it happening early enough in the day for us to make the drive and reach Ethan

studies me closely. “If you want to go after him, I’ll take you as soon as you’re out.” He promises after a

as I recall his conversation with Nina. “You knew I

“I wasn’t sure how much you were aware of,

heard everything. I confim. “And I’m not going to let

He smiles, the expression bittersweet. He looks both proud and pained

able to get there in time – to see him before he

time. I can’t let him face possible death without knowing that I love him, that

the familiar photo of my pups on the lock screen. “Oh the pups.”I clamp my

okay, where

in the children’s playroom, do you want to see

“Yes!” I exclaim eagerly.

a little while later, big smiles on their faces. Before the doctor can stop them, they climb

how are you?” I cry, wrapping them

tries to object, but I bare my teeth at him. No one keeps me

getting ridiculus.” Parker tells me sternly, his small hands framing either side of my stomach.

“You know it can

firmly. “You have to be nice to Mommy. She’s working very hard to grows you and is

right.” Riley chimes in, lowering her lips so close

be gentles with Mommy. Daddy

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