Chapter 0304

Nicholas

Piper wanted to distance her heart. She felt she was too close to me. She needed space before she could kiss me again, or touch me, or let me please her the way I wanted to.

I understood her feelings. I knew as well as she did that we could never be together. But… to be apart from her like this… I hated it.

I didn’t want her to distance herself. I didn’t want her to put her heart on ice, and withdraw her feelings. It was only because we felt so strongly for one another that our stolen moments together had been so thrilling and so satisfying.

My love for Piper had never dimmed in these years apart. Yes, hurt had festered into something dark when I had thought she left me for another man. But now that I knew the truth, I could admit to myself that the anger and betrayal I had felt stemmed from love.

In fact, my affections for her had only grown since our reunion for this competition.

She wanted to find a way to put her feelings for me on hold. Meanwhile, I didn’t know if such a thing were possible for me. Three years apart hadn’t chilled my heart. I doubted a lifetime away from her would make me care for her less.

I didn’t care that we couldn’t be together. I wanted her as much as I could have her now, so that in my future moments of loneliness, I could look back and remember.

But if she felt differently… I would never push her.

Instead, I would swallow down the loss I felt, grief in my own way, and wait until she would let me bask in the glow of her pleasure once again. Even if it would hurt me, knowing she had tucked her heart away, out of my reach.

my hair and tried to organize

Piper’s feelings for me now, or in the future, the time would eventually come when we would be forced to part, and I needed to be ready for

she and

the time, then went back into my room for my jacket.

had his arms crossed and was leaning against one of the columns near the entryway.

otherwise move.

Julian said.

said, though felt guilty. If Piper hadn’t

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who hated me,

but there was no joy in it.

I said.

his eyes. “Sure.”

felt palpable, like something that could so easily take physical form. I knew it was my fault. Over the years, I’d blamed Julian for

the words were uncomfortable in my mouth. “I should have taken you with me when I spoke to our father about Terry.”

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