Chapter 0619

On the ride back, my thoughts were buzzing. Everything I leamed this trip, combined with the things Susie told me before I left, mixed with my own wants and desires, filled my heart with hopes and worries both.

I needed time to sit with these thoughts, sort through them all, and determine what I should do with them. I was leaning toward action. Towards turning down the King's request and standing up for myself, and for the kingdom that deserved a better queen than Bridget.

But to be so bold was a struggle. If I was wrong, it could cost many lives. If the King was wrong, lives would still be forfeit.

It remained a difficult choice. I wished I could speak to Nicholas about it, but I didn't dare with Elva sitting on the other side of him in the car.

Besides, I wasn't sure where I would begin. Nicholas was even more entangled in this decision than I was. While I was certain he didn't want to be married to Bridget, I didn't want to assume that he would rather be tied down to me.

Ug! I didn't know! It was all so confusing.

Regardless of my choice, I didn't want to tell him until I was sure of it. I absolutely did not want to make life more difficult for him.

Nicholas sneaked me a sideways glance as we journeyed in the car.

Catching my eye, he lifted a brow, as if asking me, You alright?

I nodded.

He didn't seem to believe me. He reached his hand toward mine and laced our fingers together.

The action gave me comfort and I closed my eyes.

I cared so deeply for Nicholas. I wanted to make the correct choice.

The person I needed to talk to most, to bounce my thoughts around with, was Susie. I needed my best friend.

Returning the palace, I couldn't wait to talk to Susie. I went with Elva to our bedroom and helped her settle down for a nap. When Elva was resting soundly, I left her in the care of Charlotte and the nanny and left the room.

room. The door was closed. That was not all that unusual. I knocked on the

glanced, but

if she still hadn't returned from her

at me, I could see

you heard from her?" he asked me, which was just what I had been about to ask him. I shook my head. "I take it,

were the paper and pens Susie used to write her

her since before she left for home,"

that didn't bode

couldn't give into panic. It was too early in Susie's pregnancy for her to show. Her family shouldn't have any

she's fine," I said, to lift both

though his heart didn't seem to be

and together, we went down to the dining room for lunch. The room felt empty without Susie, but I kept our usual seating

that, of course they want to keep the entire family at home. What sort of shame she

quickly, I nearly toppled

"Who?" I asked.

After everything that happened, I'd seemed to make it my personal job not

She didn't push me into conversation. She'd been keeping

quicker than the rest. "Susie, of course. Didn't you hear? it's a huge scandal. It's all anyone

didn't have time for that. I looked to

in Susie's family is having a child out of

its Susie, Olivia said,

always the quiet

one else seemed to

disgraceful to talk

back because of the scandal. They think Susie even being here would only bring attention to them. At least, that's

Bridget said. "She would bring attention to her family by continuing to be here. Surely someone would ask questions, and the poor, quiet girl wouldn't know

toward the door and saw Mark storming past. Had he overheard? I'd never seen him as angry as I had in that flash of his

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