Chapter 0619

On the ride back, my thoughts were buzzing. Everything I leamed this trip, combined with the things Susie told me before I left, mixed with my own wants and desires, filled my heart with hopes and worries both.

I needed time to sit with these thoughts, sort through them all, and determine what I should do with them. I was leaning toward action. Towards turning down the King's request and standing up for myself, and for the kingdom that deserved a better queen than Bridget.

But to be so bold was a struggle. If I was wrong, it could cost many lives. If the King was wrong, lives would still be forfeit.

It remained a difficult choice. I wished I could speak to Nicholas about it, but I didn't dare with Elva sitting on the other side of him in the car.

Besides, I wasn't sure where I would begin. Nicholas was even more entangled in this decision than I was. While I was certain he didn't want to be married to Bridget, I didn't want to assume that he would rather be tied down to me.

Ug! I didn't know! It was all so confusing.

Regardless of my choice, I didn't want to tell him until I was sure of it. I absolutely did not want to make life more difficult for him.

Nicholas sneaked me a sideways glance as we journeyed in the car.

Catching my eye, he lifted a brow, as if asking me, You alright?

I nodded.

He didn't seem to believe me. He reached his hand toward mine and laced our fingers together.

The action gave me comfort and I closed my eyes.

I cared so deeply for Nicholas. I wanted to make the correct choice.

The person I needed to talk to most, to bounce my thoughts around with, was Susie. I needed my best friend.

Returning the palace, I couldn't wait to talk to Susie. I went with Elva to our bedroom and helped her settle down for a nap. When Elva was resting soundly, I left her in the care of Charlotte and the nanny and left the room.

I was in the hallway, I rushed toward Susie's room. The door was closed. That was not all that unusual. I knocked on the door as I

I quickly glanced, but he was the only

if she still hadn't returned from her trip, but that

looked at me, I could see the worry

heard from her?" he asked me, which was just what I had been about

were the paper and pens Susie used to write her letters. She also kept a diary. That was missing

since before she

that didn't

into panic. It was too early in Susie's pregnancy for her to show. Her family shouldn't have any

fine," I said, to lift both our

didn't seem to be in it. His

together, we went down to the dining room for lunch. The room felt empty without Susie, but I kept our usual seating regardless. I sat across from Veronica

scandal like that, of course they want to keep the entire family at home. What sort of shame she would face coming back here, even if she isn't

sat so quickly, I nearly toppled

"Who?" I asked.

I'd seemed to make it my personal job

need for distance. She didn't push me into conversation. She'd

of course. Didn't you

up suspense. I didn't have time

family is having a child

one actually believes its Susie, Olivia said, side-eying Bridget.

quiet

one else seemed

shook her head. "It's disgraceful to talk

won't let her come back because of the scandal. They think Susie even being here would only bring attention to them. At least, that's what

be here. Surely someone would ask questions, and the poor,

never

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