Chapter 85: Ayla

288 Vouchers

Chapter 85: Ayla

Theo held the door to our apartment open for me and I walked in, careful not to brush against him. I paused two feet inside our home. It felt wrong now. Foreign and cold. I wondered if it would ever feel warm and welcoming again. I knew it would never feel the same.

The door shut behind me and Theo’s hand went to the small of my back. I tensed and he pulled it away. It was just a force of habit. Why else would he touch me? Why would he want to touch me anymore?

I pushed the thoughts from my head. I knew it was the grief talking. Mina had spent the day by my side. Admittedly, I didn’t speak much. One of the times I did was to say that Theo would never forgive me. That he’d never look at me the same.

It didn’t help that I didn’t want him to.

His touch just reminded me of every other touch. And what they led to. And what we lost.

I was such a mix of contradicting emotions that I couldn’t make sense of it all. In my head, I knew I needed to grieve. I needed to mourn. But my heart didn’t know how. When my father died, I had a purpose. I had something to keep me going every day. I knew what my father would want. I had his memory to guide me through it all.

But I never got the chance to know my child. I didn’t know what my pup would have wanted me to do.

“Ayla,” Theo’s voice made me jump, pulling me out of my reverie.

I was standing in the middle of the living room. I was suddenly aware

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Chapter 85 Ayla

288 Vouchers

hand on my arm. I shifted away. His hand fell away and he took a step back. I didn’t look at him. I

“I… I understand you’re not… but when you are, I’m here. I’m ready to talk when you are. You should get some rest.” He stepped in closer and gently kissed my temple,

he was saying goodbye. Before I could read more into the feeling, there

to go away.

everyone to stay away for now. However, I

would require touching him. And I couldn’t bring myself to do

with my

how much I needed her. How much I needed my family. My knees buckled and

when I finally pulled away. “How

my face and hair. “Theo

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