The Perfect Run

Genome parties were always fun, but the aftermath sucked.

When he returned home to Jamie’s place, Ryan found it in ruins. The floor had been buried underneath beer bottles, pizza boxes, trash, and stuff best left forgotten. Someone had drenched the sofa in a suspicious fluid, and while DJ Brain had survived the apocalypse, a partygoer drew a smiley face on the vat’s surface. Even with repeated time-stop, it was a struggle to clean up the mess.

Ryan was still working on it by the evening.

“Faster, slave!” Ryan’s cruel taskmaster, Lanka, sat on a chair while he cleaned up the sofa with a mop. Ki-jung’s rats looked at the both of them, like viewers watching a comedy movie. “I want to see this sofa shine enough to sit my ass upon.”

“Do you want me to clean your royal butt too while I’m at it, Your Majesty?” Ryan deadpanned.

“No, thank you, I already did my part,” she replied. “You’re the one who skipped town all morning.”

“You’re just mad I was invited to the big guys’ table,” he mocked her back, before hearing his cellphone bleep in his pocket. He took a break from his dirty work to check a message from Jasmine.

JasLove: How do you want your armor?

Ryan started typing his answer.

PlushieTamer: Have you played Fallout?

JasLove: Fallout 1, Fallout 2, Tactics, or Van Buren?

PlushieTamer: You didn’t mention Brotherhood of Steel.

JasLove: That game never existed, and I’ll kill anyone who says otherwise.

PlushieTamer: Good answer. Fallout 2, America for the Enclave.

JasLove: Figured. You’re going to look great killing muties.

PlushieTamer: You and I, and my big plasma cannon...

JasLove: Keep it loaded. Might give it a good polish if you behave.

“You’re texting your girlfriend during work, Blabbermouth?” Lanka said while looking over his shoulder, grinning upon seeing the sender. “Wait, wait, wait, it’s Vulcan’s number!”

“Jealous?” Ryan asked before putting the cellphone in his pocket.

“I’m glad you didn’t commit suicide by going after Livia, but Vulcan? Mad respect. She’s totally going to shoot you one day, but your bravery shall be remembered.”

Technically, she already did shoot him. “Well, I had to work for both of us, since you couldn’t get a date.”

Lanka grinned, sipping a beer. “Where do you think these fluids came from?”

Ryan looked at the sofa, then at the mop, and finally at Lanka, whose grin grew wider. “You know what, I paid my debt to society,” he said, tossing the mop at his flatmate’s face. “Clean your mess yourself.”

“Hey, you lazy ass, get back here!” she complained, trying to get the sticky mop off her face.

Ryan ignored her, moving towards the stereo to unplug his brain in a jar. Ki-jung’s rats left for the kitchen and trailed a towel back to the sofa with their mouths, intending to clean it up themselves. Their mistress was still holed up in her room with her boyfriend, but she might emerge from their lair sometime soon.

Jamie hadn’t believed he had been promoted at first until Livia herself called him to confirm it. After a moment of silence, the swordsman had retired to his room with Ki-jung to ‘discuss’ it, but they had been alone for three hours by now. Ryan was pretty sure there wasn’t a lot of talking involved in this private celebration.

When Jamie and Ki-jung returned to the living room, the rats had cleaned the sofa enough for Lanka to slouch on it. The couple was so close they were almost touching, and Chitter had recovered from yesterday’s breakdown. In fact, she looked so happy that Ryan thought she might ascend to heaven on the spot.

“Something big happened,” the courier said, as he separated the loudspeakers from the brain in a jar. “I can tell.”

“What’s up?” Lanka asked with an eyebrow raised. “Besides changing your names to Mr. and Miss Mercury?”

Ki-jung exchanged a glance with her man, who nodded slowly. “Jamie finally proposed,” she told Lanka, giddy with joy.

Her friend blinked. “No way!”

thumb up, while the rats clapped with their tiny hands.

accepted?” Lanka asked Ki-jung a stupid

chuckled. “I want you

her, the ex-marauder

smile, though it wavered a little. “Felix would have been

ask Mercury to be the best man,” Jamie declared. “I owe my whole life to him. If he hadn’t raised me up, I would still be some pisspoor orphan selling scraps. Now… I will

gonna have to call you boss now,” Lanka said with

happening,” Zanbato replied, torn between joy, pride, and anxiety. He looked so adorable

told the swordsman. “It’s like sanity, fake it until you

I suppose,” Jamie replied, though he clearly had a long way to go. “Still, it’s so big… beyond all the responsibilities and sitting at the Olympians’ table, I will have all the division’s

to invest in soccer

replied, his voice brimming with passion. “Dynamis keeps a tight grip on sports with their Dynacup, but the slums have so many talented people. Nobody will give them

develop detox centers, hospitals…” Ki-jung

with all of Rust Town.” Ryan shrugged. “That place is the

actually seemed to take his suggestion to heart. “That’s not a bad idea,” he admitted, looking at

at Ryan. “You have seen the Olympians. Do you think

the

As long as Jamie followed orders and didn’t interfere with the other divisions, Augustus probably wouldn’t give a damn if he used funds to create orphanages or charities. Neptune and Livia seemed more interested in developing the family’s empire, and they would probably approve the initiative if only

Bacchus however...

be open to the idea,” Ryan admitted, with a caveat. “As long as it doesn’t interfere with

they exchanged a silent glance. Ki-jung didn’t give up though. “If you could talk to Livia

replied, a

“But be careful around her. She’s

to him first,” Lanka said, laughing when

glanced at the mice in the room. “Sorry. Some of my best friends are

between you two,” Ki-jung smiled warmly.

warmly putting a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “I don’t know if it will last, but I hope she can make

before you give me diabetes,” the courier replied, carrying his brain in a jar to the garage. When he left the main room, the trio were discussing the wedding’s date

up during the party, and Ryan’s car was spared from the guests’ attention. If Lanka had used his backseat for her vile, sticky deed, the time-traveler might have gone on a suicide run out

place. He opened the door and sat at

of funny alternate universe songs, a faint voice

“Hi, Riri.”

garage door was closed, and finally increased the

it’s me. I don’t

I just had to confirm it.” He had to ask since

umm…” She stopped, not sure what to say. The awkwardness

spare her further embarrassment.

we played games. Board games.” She marked a short pause, trying to

“Are you inviting me?”

“I… maybe.”

wrecked beyond repair, or the kids’ presence helped

me about the Meta-Gang,” Len changed the subject, “I think you should know. I followed their submarine to a hidden

Ryan put his hands on the wheel. “Have you told

thought I should tell you first. Riri, is this true

one of their suits,” Ryan replied, putting his hands on

wondering if she was shocked, sad, or just lost the

for you. She’s better than the others.” Another pause. “You deserve

voice broke Ryan’s heart.

“Does she know?”

glanced out of the window, and

seem loyal to Augustus, Vulcan also had a fiery temper, enough to try murdering the courier in a previous

up undone at the end of a

said, clearing her

head perked up in interest. “You’ve

questions. “You create your time-stop by aligning your two selves, right? So for the ten seconds duration,