The Perfect Run

It was May 12th, and Team Quicksave the Pandas had assembled.

As he drove towards Rust Town, Ryan hoped this battle would go better than Vulcan’s doomed assault against the Meta-Gang. The time-traveler had gathered everyone he could call upon, provided all the necessary intel, and he wore a cashmere suit. Everyone would soon move into position, Shortie included.

The die was cast.

Atom Cat remained silent at the car’s front seat, having outfitted his costume with a dart bandolier. Ryan thought knives were classic for a reason, but the idea of someone getting beaten by explosive darts amused him to no end. The and Wardrobe stayed at the back, the former whispering a song to himself, and the latter examining Ryan with her big, beautiful eyes.

“Yuki, I know you designed my new mask,” Ryan said, “but this is getting a little creepy.”

“You went on a date yesterday,” Wardrobe said with a smile. “I can feel it.”

Did she have a gossip radar or something? Then again, Ryan had returned to his penthouse suspiciously late into the night.

In the end, the ‘ten-minute visit’ lasted half an hour. Lucky Girl had incredible taste, both for interior decoration and her sculpture hobby, to the point the courier would introduce her to Wardrobe. He had the feeling they would get along fantastically well. However, while Ryan had enjoyed the ‘date,’ his master plan had utterly failed. Lucky Girl just sent him a message saying she would ‘allow’ him to invite her again.

“It was nothing serious, Yuki,” said the courier, “so I’m still open to new romantic applications.”

“Sorry, I really like you Ryan, but I’m already in an exclusive contract with someone else.“

“Really? Congratulations!” the time-traveler replied with a warm smile. “That’s wonderful!”

“Thanks, she’s super nice, you will love her,” Yuki said with a grin. “But we’re talking about your love life. Is she in Il Migliore? Is it Len?”

“I will leave you to your endless speculations, watching as you go down the rabbit ho—” Wardrobe’s costume instantly transformed into a cosplay of Sherlock Holmes, hat and pipe included. “Hey, that’s cheating!”

“Hm…” Wardrobe observed Ryan, making deductions in her mind. “If I had to make an elaborate guess… I would say Atom Cat’s sister Fortuna, and it didn’t go farther than a chaste kiss.”

Atom Cat emerged from his silent reverie to look at Ryan in disbelief. “What?” he asked.

“That’s awesome Yuki,” the congratulated Wardrobe. “How did you figure it out?”

“Elementary, my dear Panda!”

“You know Sherlock Holmes never said that in the Conan Doyle novels?” Ryan complained, but Wardrobe ignored him.

“We know she was pestering him for a date, and from his expression, he clearly considered it a chore before being pleasantly surprised,” Yuki explained, her mannerism mimicking Sherlock Holmes’ most famous movie adaptations. “Hence, he accepted out of a sense of obligation, perhaps hoping to subtly discourage her. His hairstyle is also well-groomed and his smell remains the same. Thus, we can assume the absence of physical intimacy.”

“I hate Yellow Genomes,” Ryan said, glowering while ignoring Atom Cat’s baleful glare. “I hate them so much. Also, why didn’t you use this costume before? You could have cracked the whole conspiracy in minutes!”

“I don’t like this costume,” Wardrobe replied, changing back to her normal clothes. “If I wear it for too long, I develop a craving for cocaine, tobacco, and violins. That’s not good for my health.”

“Ryan, I warned you,” Felix said, infuriated. “I asked you man to man, friend to friend.”

The courier looked into his second favorite cat's eyes, and decided to tease him some more. “I just want us to become family, Kitten,” the courier said softly. “Is that so much to ask?”

Instead of turning red as Ryan had hoped, Felix answered with a fiendish smile. “Ryan, your adoptive sister,” he spoke with the same teasing tone as the courier, “she’s single, isn’t she?”

When Felix struck back, he hit hard! “I see the kitten is young, but he has claws."

“I’m just saying, we could become a family, Quickie. But if you take, you have to give back too.”

“That’s great!” Wardrobe said, finding twisted joy in the scene. “You marry each other’s sister, and then your kids will have a teen romance! I can see the drama!”

Ryan looked back at the road. “You discovered my only weakness, Kitten. You are a troll worthy of respect.”

“Thank you, now drive,” Felix replied. “If the Meta don’t kick your ass today, I’ll do it myself afterward.”

“Oh, we’re going to Rust Town?” Wardrobe asked with a frown. “I had the feeling we would go there, but Enrique refused to tell us until we arrived.”

the bag, we could check our intel,” Ryan said, Felix rolling his eyes. This reminded

brought out his phone, having

read the report while showing Wardrobe and the a picture of Hannifat Lecter. “The USA issued an

killer before getting his Elixirs?” Ryan asked. Every time he thought Hannifat couldn’t

psycho long before he went Psycho. Orange/Violet. He can turn his skin into a highly-resistant carbon alloy, granting him enhanced strength and tank-like resilience; additionally, his stomach has been turned into a pocket dimension where he can store almost anything.” Felix paused briefly. “Huh, he has

dimension, right?” Wardrobe asked. “I really like

commando, Vietnam veteran, US secret service agent, and an Area 51 super-soldier experiment. However, his testimonies contradict real events, and he becomes aggressive if called out on the inconsistencies. Orange/Red, his body is

consume metal? Not stone

metal,” Felix replied, a little confused by

power had

in the courier’s frozen time. However, then he shouldn’t age and a

remembered the end of his disastrous Augusti Run. Frank the Mad and Augustus had briefly traded blows, and the Psycho’s power had

the spatial stasis hypothesis. But then, how could it explain the immunity to

thought. The courier had the feeling he had all the pieces of

that Psyshock’s real name was Francis Grey of all things. The group passed the Private

the north of Rust Town and its industrial district. The plan called for Dynamis to surround the Meta-Gang from all sides, and knowing Psypsy, he must have taken the courier’s prank

checking the time. Rust Town was eerily silent as they drove, the air suffused with tension. Either Psyshock had already brainwashed the locals, or

traveled through the skies like a

then, the courier had reached an abandoned gas station north of the area, vast swathes of concrete covered in oil stains. The place looked like a graveyard, facing a series

Sarin.

unleashed a blast of concussed air straight at the car. “It’s time, boys and girls!” the driver whistled as his

Dynamis dog drones broke through the buildings’ doors, having waited in

prepared for battle.

shapeshifted before he hit the road. His bestial form tackled the drones, while Sarin kept bombarding

like a cruise missile, but he was only the vanguard. A swarm of helicopters flew above Rust Town

all of Rust Town, before turning into a full-blown quake.

for Rust

abruptly stopped the car near the gas station. He and his remaining teammates quickly stepped out of it, the whole

and Desert Eagle out of

cosplay of Frankenstein’s Monster. Lightning surged through her body, allowing her to move at an impressive speed.

darts and threw them at Sarin. Hazmat Girl blasted them midflight, causing the projectiles to violently detonate and throw her back against

above, Ryan

his spine, as he pointed his coil gun behind him and pressed the trigger. Acid Rain had teleported behind him, knives in hands, but had to duck out of the way to dodge

snarled angrily, raising her weapons threateningly. “You

the back when we meet,” Ryan taunted her, having grown almost accustomed to it. “You don’t have

a knife at his head with deadly accuracy. While the courier dodged,

Girl’s blast hit the gas station and detonated whatever was left of the gasoline within in

shields of glass formed above the various heroes to protect them from the acid raindrops. This gave Ryan and Felix precious time to rise

Ryan, acid raindrops turning him

as he

in hand. She unleashed a hail of gunfire at Shroud and his companions, the Carnival member raising a multilayered barrier of glass to protect the

with a maddened face, her projectiles unable to force their way

defense into a volley of deadly shards, while Ryan assisted him with bullets and Atom Cat with explosive darts. Acid Rain tossed the machine guns away and teleported away before any projectile could hit her. The more he observed her lightning speed in action, the more Ryan grew convinced her teleportation ability came with enhanced spatial awareness; the same way his own power provided an enhanced sense

coming from the Junkyard. Frank the Mad came into view, now the size of a ten meters tall giant and smashing a transformed Wyvern through whatever buildings

Kaiju battle!

fanboyed, if his entire team’s life wasn’t on the line. A shiver went down his spine, as he sensed Acid Rain teleport all around them at blinding speed. In the blink of

Shit!

he could and tossing them away before they could explode. But ten seconds were far too few, and while he could spare Felix and himself the worst of the bombardment, two grenades exploded right next to Shroud. The detonation blew the

shards faltered and the heroes’ rainshields collapsed into dust. Ryan sensed acid

exploited the cooldown to appear right in front of Felix and stab him in the chest

grown numb to these things, Ryan panicked. “Felix!

from her fight with the drones, leaving the to manage them, and rushed

Ryan shouted a warning, Acid Rain teleporting right next to Wardrobe with a gun in hand. Thankfully, Yuki’s costume changed into a ghost bedsheet before the teleporter pressed the trigger, the bullet phasing

blondie!” Ryan challenged Acid Rain, though she teleported out of his bullets’ path. “I’m leaving for the Purple World and stranding you