The Perfect Run

None dared to move, as Sarin pointed her gauntlets at the group. Energy built up within her hands, ready to unleash mighty shockwaves.

Truth be told, Ryan didn’t fear his rebellious VP. He could easily stop time and defeat her. However, they were in an enclosed space with Knockoffs kept in vats nearby; if she unleashed a shockwave and splattered the courier with the substance, even by accident...

“So, it’s treason then?” Ryan joked. “You know you will get impeached for this defiance, right?”

“You’re the traitor!” Sarin threatened him with her gauntlet. “You promised me to find a cure! I’ve believed you, killed for you, and now… and now you can’t follow through with it, you’re going to turn back!”

“Sarin, darling, there are others in the ro—”

“I won’t let you time-travel again,” Sarin snarled, uncaring. “Not until you cure me first. Even if it takes you months, I won’t let you go back until it’s done.”

Ryan tensed, and glanced at the other people in the room. Livia remained unperturbed, probably using her power on Sarin to find a way out. And Alchemo...

He wasn’t surprised.

“You knew,” Ryan said. “You bastard, you listened at the door when I told you not to.”

Every time the courier found the strength to trust that brain-in-a-jar, he found a new and interesting way to betray his confidence.

“I did no such thing,” Alchemo replied, though he sounded apologetic. “But when you wanted me to upload that girl’s memory map…”

“You checked her memories,” Ryan realized, infuriated. The Genius could harvest and read memories from others. “Like Psyshock.”

“I had to, to make sure there was no sabotage left,” Alchemo defended himself. “I am not the wronged party here, meatbag. Why didn’t you tell us, you selfish brat? After everything my daughter and I did for you?”

“Because I told you once!” Ryan snarled, raising a finger at Alchemo. “And you betrayed my trust! You went mad and tried to extract my brain, to prevent me from reloading!”

The Genius stumbled back as if he had been slapped.

“Tea had to finish me off mid-procedure, to spare me from decades of imprisonment,” Ryan continued. “You couldn’t live with the knowledge that you would forget everything.”

“Because you’re killing us, asshole!” Sarin snarled. “You’re playing with our lives!”

“That is not how it works, Sarin,” Livia spoke up, completely calm. “This is your psychosis talking, not you. I understand you must feel desperate—”

“You can’t understand me, jackass. You can’t even understand what it is to be me.” Sarin clenched her fists. “Six months.”

The Psycho let out these words like bullets, like a heavy secret she finally found the courage to get off her chest.

“The first time… the first time I gained my powers, the wind dispersed me,” she admitted. “I… I didn’t know how my power worked very well, so it took me months to pull myself together. Months to find a container I didn’t rust on contact. So no, you don’t understand what it is to be me. To feel nothing, to see people have sex and eat food and sleep and just watch!”

By now she was screaming.

“You can’t understand being separated from the world outside by this cloth prison. You can’t understand being afraid of any blade around you, in case one breaches the one thing keeping you in one piece! I’ve spent years like this!”

“And you spent those years hanging out with Adam and letting him sow misery wherever he went,” Ryan replied, his tone icy. “I’ve watched you stand by his side after he burnt all of New Rome to cinders. Did you stand by his side when he force-fed Helen an Elixir? Would you have let him turn me into a Psycho, if I couldn’t turn back time?”

“I…” To her credit, Hazmat Girl faltered a little at his words, but not enough to take responsibility. “I had no choice! Nobody else would help, and when I was in, he wouldn’t let me go!”

Ryan didn’t buy that excuse. “You always have a choice, even if some will cost you more than others.” He knew that from experience. “You just weren’t brave enough to take a stand. And unlike Frank, Mongrel, or Acid Rain, you can’t claim insanity. You’re entirely lucid.”

The courier felt some sympathy for her situation, and he owed her one for helping him so far, but it didn’t even begin to make up for her actions. He would cure her, but he wouldn’t forget.

“Sarin, we are working on a solution,” Livia promised, her tone soft and diplomatic. “We have gone further than what Adam the Ogre ever promised you. But we need more time.”

always more time,” she said, skeptical. “Adam

I will,” Ryan swore. “But you have seen the corpses outside, the people Ghoul killed before I could stop

us all hope, and you’re to throw us all away! Who gives you the right to let us all

me. I didn’t ask for this power, but I made the best of it. I can achieve

Another me. If you follow through with your promise and don’t forget us. You hold all the

we could copy your memories,” Livia suggested, hopeful. “I

Sarin pointed out. “What brain can you copy? If you die now, I die

Ryan pointed out. “What do you

froze

Livia said. “Because you are not thinking straight, Sarin.

didn’t listen. “I’m sick of words,” she said, pointing both her gauntlets at Ryan. “You’re all talk and

the courier replied. The words sounded

transfers. Your amphibian

being cured,” she said. “Because you won’t stop him, and he will remember. Has he abused your trust

should do, trust?” Sarin trembled.

his silence. “Because

The Psycho opened fire.

wall behind Ryan, passing within an inch of his head and forcing a hole into the thick steel. He didn’t

“Fuck!”

with her fists. She had raised her white flag. “I… I just don’t

will live,” Ryan said, his tone softening a little. “I swear, by the end of it, you will have a happy

hissed, her voice full of bitterness. “Don’t you get it? I don’t want to be Sarin! I don’t want to

will cure you all,” he said. “But you’re not the only person on my Christmas list. Your turn will come, even if I have to repeat the same month for years, but you shall wait

push him away, which he took

vocal device, in his case. “Meatbag, is that… is that why you left

And once this loop is done, I hope I won’t see you again. I’ll consider your favor settled, and you won’t

the cold hard floor,

“I’m sorry?”

another me having a moment of weakness. I am not the person he was. We

are on your worst day,” Ryan replied. “It

robot daughter, because he drove everyone

for you,” the

Doll too. She wanted to help others, so I did. I can help you, and that gaseous girl. Maybe she doesn’t have

trust you,” Ryan replied. “And the more people who know about my power, the greater

expect us to trust you unconditionally!” Alchemo

putting a hand on the courier’s shoulder. “You

earned,”

Doll’s memories and take them with you,” Alchemo said. “You may not like me, meatbag, but she loved you… much to my annoyance. If we never meet again, my

have people who care for and rely on you, Ryan,” Livia said, glancing at a despairing Sarin. “You don’t have to leave them all behind. I can understand the risks, but… is

Right in the gut.

left behind people with whom he had shared a lifetime, never to take it back. He remembered Spain, France, Italy, all the places he visited, all the communities he helped but

the same with Rome, achieving his Perfect Run with Len and leaving the place afterward. No one would know but Livia. He could begin again, as he had always done. He had fun hanging out with Felix, the Wardrobe, Vulcan, and many others,

Make connections that wouldn’t break, that could go

realized something important. He couldn’t do the same thing over and over

courier sighed. “I won’t take everyone. Too

a repeat of

but I have the feeling now is the best time to make back-ups of everyone.

mobilized, things would

to have

out how to record her memories. Ryan didn’t know if it was

situation, no, this entire loop, was a